Are vegetarians just fussy?

[changemyself]

So, me and DP haven't spoken for three days now. We had an argument which was as a result of him saying I used to be fussy when I was younger. Which I was. I now eat everything, except meat, this is for moral reasons.
He went on to say that being vegetarian is just a faddy, fussy first world idea and said vegans are even worse.
In ten years he has NEVER had any issue with me being vegetarian and doesn't eat much meat himself as I do most of the cooking.
I couldn't believe it and told him it's going to take a bloody long time for me to get over this. AIBU to still be annoyed?

And that relative I mentioned above is vehemently against people eating eggs, regardless of how the chickens are kept. He says that all egg production is cruel and even the best free range hens are kept in appalling conditions and we shouldn't support egg farming. Yet he eats he cakes that j bake using eggs. I have pointed out to him that he shouldn't eat any of the cake as it contains egg but he just shrugs his shoulders and says 'cake is different'.

Nothing wrong with someone being a genuine vegetarian, but the 'fussy' label might stem from those idiots who say 'yes I'm a vegetarian .... but I eat fish/bacon/whatever' or happily eat crap with gelatine/other byproducts, wear leather, otherwise don't give a toss about animals. They're just fussy and attention seeking. Real vegetarian - not fussy.

Yes, obviously vegetarians are just fussy. So are people who expect their OH to respect their views. Definitely a first world idea- no vegetarians in poor countries, no none at all.

We're the nightmare family to feed. We have veggies, coeliacs, diabetics and crohns in our family.

I'm vegetarian but wear leather.

I don't think it is because it is an idiot. It's just that I do what I feel capable of. There are so many ethical issues around all the things we consume that if I attempted to be perfect, I'd end up with more mental health issues.

Why draw the like at leather rather than veganism, or veganism rather than only local food, or only local food that is organic, or only local organic food and non polluting products of all kinds, and only second hand clothes and furniture, and giving almost all your income to water aid?

There's no obvious dividing line. People should just do what they feel capable of. And eating locally sourced meat can be a better option for some people.

There are lots of reasons for becoming a vegetarian. I became a vegetarian because I am "fussy" - I used to be able to eat flesh that didn't remind me it was flesh. I remember, as a child, even although my mother always bought good quality food, I would occasionally find a bit of fat or a sinew or something in my mouth. A "tube" very occasionally.

So...I was fussy. I got fed up going to peoples' houses and being served sub standard meat which I had no control over. It became easier for me to become vegetarian. That was 20 years ago.

Meat eaters and vegetarian can both be fussy!! Most fussiest eaters I know are adult neat eaters who live off chicken nuggets and burgers etc!

I'm vegetarian and by no means fussy.
I'm very strict with checking what I'm eating is vegetarian society approved but other than that I will eat anything.

I can go to any restaurant etc and I will find something. Even if it's chips. I never make a fuss or draw attention to it.

Whereas I often go out with meat eaters who are fussy and picking over the menu.

Always get sick on holiday from the meat.

So yanbu OP.

On a side note I think vegetarians win the award for the most stupid things that are said to them haha. So many idiotic comments.

Im not a tree hugging hippy or whatever and never ram my views down anyone's throat. But yes the world would be healthier without the consumption of meat, and it certainly is not sustainable long term.

I've known exceptionally fussy meat eaters and very fussy vegetarians but being vegetarian doesn't make someone fussy.

I'm vegetarian. I have been since I was 5 (I'm now almost 31). I chose this myself because I simply don't like the taste/texture or thought of eating animal flesh, it's not for moral reasons at all. If I liked it I'd eat it. There's not much else I don't like so wouldn't class myself as being fussy or attention seeking.

There are fussy vegetarians but there's also fussy meat eaters.

My husband isn't vegetarian as it never causes an issue really.

I have a genuine question to ask vegetarians as a meat eater myself. For those of you who are vegetarian for moral reasons, how do you justify consuming dairy, wearing leather and using animal tested products as the animals used to make these are kept under the same condition.
I'm genuinely curious as I find this with a lot of veggie friends. They shake their head at me eating a steak but have no problem putting milk in their tea, seems odd to me.

Well can only speak for myself but I don't use leather, animal tested stuff, and have minimal dairy, mostly soya I have.
But even so minimal amount of that is still better than hundreds of animals slaughter for me to eat in my lifetime?
And surely anything you do, little or small, is better than not doing it?
So say I had some milk, from a local farm, that's still better surely than eating them, siting on stretched skin (leather) and using products tested(tortured) on animals?

I'm veggie and grew up with a vegetarian mother and both my sisters ended up vegetarian too. It's quite simple - we don't eat meat. One of my sisters was fussy about other foods but the meat thing is just one thing not in a meal or replaced in a meal. I actually hate having conversations about it because other people seem to get in to such a flap about what to feed me. My FIL likes to discuss in depth what MIL has made me and how wonderful it is that she's cooked for me because he just cannot comprehend not wanting to eat meat. It makes me so uncomfortable as I am not fussy with it in the slightest. If your DH has suddenly decided there's a problem then YANBU. It has little to no impact on him. Surely by now he's used to having to prepare two different meals at times, which is hardly the most difficult of tasks when you fully understand that it is just about making a meat free alternative?!

We're not veggie, but have high welfare animal produce (meat/dairy/eggs) only.

There is nothing attention seeking or faddy about not wanting animals to die so that I can put them in my gob. Nothing at all.

This really

You know the types, they're veggie, intolerant to this , allergic to that... bollocks are they. Attention seeking twats is what they are. The trouble is they make people think that all cigfies are just fussy.

I have met far too many fussy eaters who are intolerant of this and that. The worst is my MIL who is allergic to egg (but not cake), can't eat pork but eats sausages, gamma and bacon, can't eat chicken thighs but is ok with chicken breasts. The list just goes on.

They seem to have moved on from vegetarianism to gluten intolerant though.

He sounds like a knob.

I don't like labels. I'm not 'a' vegetarian/vegan, a member of a weird sect or anything. I just don't eat or use animals or products from them. i chose this way of life almost 30 years ago and it was bloody hard work then, smiling through gritted teeth when ordering food and explaining that no, I don't just eat lettuce and lentils. I really thought the world had become more accepting these days, especially as a huge amount of the population follow vegan or vegetarian diets.

I'm probably fussy. I don't eat meat or meat products, I also don't eat other things, like - blackcurrents, mangoes, full fat milk, mushrooms, mushy peas, the list goes on.
I honestly couldn't care less about what other people think about my dietary preferences. I cook for myself and if I'm eating out I just pick a vegetarian option.
I also used to cook meat for my son until he went to uni.
I honestly don't get why vegetarianism is such a big deal to some people.

It's not just vegetarians. Now there are gluten-free, no-carb, no-fat, no-sugar, etc. etc. Plus there are some strange combo type ones like "vegetarian except chicken", "vegan except on Thanksgiving", etc. It does get confusing. And that's why we don't have dinner parties anymore. Just go out to restaurants and pp can order what they like. Kind of a shame though because I do like to host but just too much trouble these days. I just feel bad when my guests can't/don't eat what I have prepared.

But so what if you are a "fussy" eater? It's barely an insult really. Not to mention, 100% your right. These days, I sometimes feel like dh and I are the only pp we know who are not "fussy" eaters!

Ok i understand why veggies are veggie (I was one), Now as someone else said I try to only eat high welfare foods (I do visit family and will not inflict my morals on them).

But yes they are fussy eaters, they are choosing not to eat a huge chunk of the food readily available to them. Which is the definition of fussy eating choosing not to eat a large variety of foods.

My DSis is "vegan", but will happily tuck into an "ethically produced" bacon sandwich now and again. And seafood.

An ex friend of mine would forget she was vegan when pissed, and order fish and chips, pizza etc. Fair enough, but she'd make a huge song and dance about being vegan, whilst tucking into a pizza topped with cheese.

I was a pescatarian when I was younger and kind of just got on with it. Rennet free cheese anyone?

Even now I prefer, in the main, for the meat to be an ingredient - like little pieces of chorizo in a soup, and 4 days out of 7, I don't eat meat at all, but it's not a conscious decision, just what I fancy on the day. Occasionally I'll get the urge for a medium rare steak, or a Byron's Burger (YUM). Which makes me a meat eater, obviously.

OP I think trouble here is living with fussy eater is hard work .
Their diet becomes your diet .
Do you cook your DH favourite meat dishes and eat them with him ?
If he cooks his favourite meat dish do you eat it with him?
Do you cook your favourite meat free dish and eat with him ?
Does your DP cook your favourite meat free dish and eat it with you.
Hopefully your answer are yes to all questions if the answers are no . It is not really fair is it.
Hopefully you cook food your dh likes about 1/2 the week . I am saying you as you said you do most of the cooking .
You can be as fussy as you like but make sure you DP get foods he likes

Well, no, Summerainbow I don't eat his favourite meat dish with him. I don't eat meat. I don't understand what you mean.
He has now apologised again and said he didn't mean it but he knew it would piss me off as we were having an arguement

Sorry I meant to say that the reason he said it was because he knew it would piss me off.

To be fair, it can sometimes be annoying being partnered up with a vegetarian. My husband is, but can't really elucidate why, other than he's really stubborn and never gives up on something when he starts it.

But I have had the holidays in Paris walking past all the wonderful restaurants and going back to the hotel for instant noodles because there's nothing vegetarian on the menus of any of them. Or never being able to eat out in France, Spain, Greece for the same reason. And I have been embarrassed by having to hand over a long list of requirements to relatives.

And eating at friends is always such a disappointment as they always default to vegetarian so it's either pasta and fucking pesto or some goats cheese monstrosity. And I hear from other people what good cooks they are and how their duck is to die for. But I never get to try it because he's vegetarian they view me as vegetarian too by default.

And it took a lot of the pleasure out of cooking for me. There was no joy in cooking a meal for one and having nobody to share with. So I just started cooking vegetarian, but it wasn't the same.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that as the partner of a vegetarian you do have to make sacrifices for their principles. So occasionally partners might get a bit frustrated and snippy.

I know I do sometimes, and DH will tell me that he appreciates the fact I have made those sacrifices and miss out on stuff because of his principles. From my point of view it's a two way flow - he sacrifices stuff to be with a vegetarian, so a little tolerance for occasional frustration with it should come from your side too.

billsykes no need to sacrifice eating meat at home. Just cook 2 seperate dishes with side dishes for both of you. Surely you can enjoy your meal wihout having the exact same food on your plate as your husband?
And no one ever defaulted to my ex being vegetarian because I was. That's weird. I think I would have tried explaining to them that we were 2 seperate people.