DH swearing - would this piss you off?

[muminmanchester]

For a few months now DH has been swearing whenever DS wakes in the night. Things like 'for fucks sake' or 'what the fuck does he want now'. It really upsets me and makes me feel like he's angry with DS for what is perfectly normal and reasonable behaviour. He's 10 months old and crying is the only way he can tell us something is wrong in the night.

DH is a fab dad and I have no concerns about him ever being angry or upset with DS, but the swearing really gets my protective instincts going and makes me very upset.

Would this piss you off? Or am I being over sensitive? It's so hard to tell when you've not slept properly for the best part of a year!!

I used to sing 'shut the fuck up' to the tune of twinkle twinkle little star to mine. Because I wanted them to shut up.

I don't know. I can understand muttered swearing but "jerking you awake by shouting" sounds very different. My ex did this, and as time went on It was clear he had real, nasty anger issues. It was horrible. Only you know if it's just a release or whether he's got a problem with anger. Ensuring everyone is thoroughly woken up by his swearing and shouting isn't on in my opinion.

Also I think there becomes a problem when you're directing your anger at the baby. Most people are angry because they have to get up and they're tired, but not actually with the baby. Babies wake and cry, they can't help it. Shouting "what the fuck does he want now" loud enough to jerk your partner awake is different from muttering ffs for being woken and going to cuddle your baby.

makeitrain sorry, I wasn't clear - it's the baby's shouting that's jerking me awake, definitely not DH's. His is a muttering. I wouldn't stand for him shouting!

I get what your saying OP, I think because the swearing is aimed at your DC and not a general swear, is this maybe it?

I do it too I've never said FFS as much as I have in the past few months (terribly wakeful baby!).

That's exactly it MissJamie

It would probably upset me too but if he's never upset with your DS when interacting with him it's probably just a case of exhaustion when his sleep cycle is interrupted.

I'd just say 'He's only a baby. I bet you was the same at his age.'

I'd ask him to say something different. It would upset me to hear him say 'ffs what does he want now', and I dont think you are being over sensitive about it.

I do this in the middle of the night. It's frustration at loosing sleep that's all.