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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Childminder letting kids watch TV

43 replies

Teacherontherun · 25/10/2016 22:25

Hi, I live in Scotland and the kids have just gone back to school. We had an INSET day on Monday and my kids went to the childminder who also happens to be a old school friend. when I asked my 7 DD What she had done she said the CM had the TV on all day and they "just played ". Now I am not overly bothered about a chilled out day especially as holiday cover is cheaper than full fees. BUT here is the issue -CM told me TV was only on for the last hour but another friend collected at lunch and the TV was on. My baby also goes three days a week and i am worried now that I can't trust her to actually be doing stimulating activities. every time we collect from her the TV is on but we assume that its just for after tea, now I am not sure

OP posts:

Original poster

Teacherontherun · 26/10/2016 08:25

I have just driven passed and the TV is on.

OP posts:

Love51 · 26/10/2016 08:32

It sounds like the TV is on more than you would like. Is your kid in the same room as the TV? I ask because my kids are in a playroom (converted garage) but the cms own kids and bigger mindees are often in the lounge watching TV / playing age appropriate video games. She prefers this to the older ones bringing ds-es (Nintendo, not their sons!). But it is the honesty that is important, not the amount of TV time per se.

Atenco · 26/10/2016 08:44

Surely childminders are being paid enough that they could devote a bit of time to doing things with the children. It's all very well people saying that maybe it is just sheer coincidence and your dd is exaggerating, but if a person gets caught shoplifting, everybody quite rightly assumes that they didn't get caught on their first theft.

yesterdaysunshine · 26/10/2016 08:45

Childminders have to be OFSTED registered so I don't think 'stick kids in front of the tv' is on the EY curriculum!

oleoleoleole · 26/10/2016 08:50

She's perhaps a bit more relaxed in the holidays as may have a bigger group of mixed aged children. The tv could be on and she may be doing an activity with a small group whilst another group watch it. Personally I very much doubt it's on all day, everyday. If you've ever been a childminder or nanny the last thing you want on all day is the tv, believe me.

I wouldn't take what your DC say too seriously, after all they come out of school not being able to remember what they had for lunch and have done 'not much'

If you're really that bothered the way I'd mention it is to say that it was lovely the kids could have a chilled out day in front of the tv for a change and see what her reaction is.

I presume tv isn't allowed in your house?

SarahAnderson · 26/10/2016 08:53

following as I have also become a bit more aware of TV at our childminder.

DD has gone there since she was a baby but now she can speak.... she tells us all about the cartoons she's watching!

Our childminder is fantastic, goes out every day with them, lots of art activities, takes them to museums etc. (today they're going to science museum) so I am not overly concerned but it really does stand out that my DD only talks about the TV when she comes home.

Peach9876 · 26/10/2016 09:01

Sarah I wouldn't worry about her talking about TV shows. It's funny what kids pay more attention to and focus on. It sounds like you have a great CM, taking them out, doing creative activities etc... It could just be a case of TV is very much a novelty, as CM only lets them watch in such small bursts or as a 'special treat' for good behaviour... or maybe they even watch it and act things out afterwards. So it's making it all a bigger deal to your DD.

As for OPs DC I would worry if they don't do anything but 'just playing' and the TV is always on. That's not meeting any of the OFSTED requirements. Does you little one have a Learning Journey? Every child under 5 should have one in any care setting (as far as I'm aware). And it should track learning though play with various activities.

MrsJayy · 26/10/2016 09:07

She can't be Ofsted registered because we have no Ofsted in Scotland yes I know I'm being picky but it annoyed me. Anyway your 7 might have been exaggerating TV and then played seems a normal thing for a 7 year old to do . what did you want the childminder to do Op

maddiemookins16mum · 26/10/2016 09:11

I was a nanny (and had an Au Pair for a couple of years). I used the TV for roughly an hour or so a day (mainly at tea time) and just before nap/story time (but those were the days when there were no dedicated kids channels). Our Au Pair had the TV on a lot, it never really bothered me - it was more background stuff. DD would pick and choose if she wanted to watch. I'd quite often come home and find DD doing something in her room and the lovely Au Pair would be ironing (bless her lovely Aussie soul) in front of The Simpsons.

Chickoletta · 26/10/2016 09:12

I would be very unhappy about both the lying and the TV issue to be honest. I hate the idea of 'background noise' - I firmly believe that this is bad for children's concentration in the long term as it teaches them to flit between one thing and another. My DCs watch plenty of TV but they either watch it or do something else - I don't let them do a puzzle with TV on in the background for example.

My 2 both went to a nursery rather than a CM and this was a brilliant, stimulating environment for them which really prepared them for school.

MistressDeeCee · 26/10/2016 09:14

Part of the issue is that her own son is extremely demanding and if he wants to watch tv then he just shout until she gives in

^ Well - you already knew this and aren't comfortable with it, and obviously its part of the explanation as to why the TV is on so often! In which case, maybe at some inconvenience to you but thats always the risk - you need to resign yourself to the fact that you have to move your DD

Not seeing the point of angsting about or approaching CM as to whether she is lying about the TV at this particular time, when you already knew truth of the matter and partly, the reason.

Follow through on the decision you've already reached in your mind

Mother86 · 26/10/2016 09:20

Personally having the TV on all day doesn't bother me. We have CBeebies on all day but my son has plenty of toys to play with and he will only stop and watch for his favourite shows which probably only adds up to about 1.5 hours a day. I'd rather have CBeebies on in the background than some of my music which is adult and I wouldn't want him listening to. We have plenty of creative play in the day and often go out to the park, shops, library, groups etc.

It's the LYING that I'd be furious about, anyone who is lying to me about my child would get ripped into.

Richardhun · 26/10/2016 09:27

Keep driving past OP, then move them.

I wouldn't have TV on all day.

yesterdaysunshine · 26/10/2016 09:34

Mother86, it's up to you, it's your child, but it's not great for development to be honest.

I'd be really unhappy about it.

RentANDBills · 26/10/2016 09:44

An hour a day plus is a lot of TV!

I can't think of a job where I'd (Nanny) get away with playing that much TV.

TV before naptime is also counter produxtive as its stimulating, not relaxing

LittleReindeerwithcloggson · 26/10/2016 09:54

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but I also used to have CBeebies on most of the day in the background when mine were little. My DDs are older now and both complemented at school for their ability to get on and concentrate and not get easily distracted. Both are advanced for their years and my youngest is working at a level 2 years above her actual age. I can safely say that the to did no harm to their development! If anything it gave them the ability to focus despite background noise and to multi task.
Having said that, mine went to a nursery on the days I worked which was amazing. I would not have paid someone to let them just watch to all day.

LittleReindeerwithcloggson · 26/10/2016 09:55

Tv not to - I hate auto correct!

yesterdaysunshine · 26/10/2016 09:56

Yeah but that's like the endless arguments about unhealthy food vs healthy food blah blah.

Yes, it didn't impact on YOUR daughters, but that doesn't mean it won't impact on anybody's

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