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Original poster

My DH's SN have prevented me from helping a woman in need

6 replies

BathshebaKnickerStickers · 24/10/2016 19:46

Trying to cut it short - acquaintance I first met 12 years ago, she moved away, lost contact, met her in the street a wee while ago, gave her my number etc....

Her life is a mess. Too much detail would be identifying, but essentially it's a mess, mostly not of her doing....

She phoned tonight when I was dropping my youngest at an activity - she needed a place to stay tonight until she can get to the council offices first thing tomorrow.

I feel so upset as I had to turn her down. My DH is autistic and has social phobia - he simply couldn't have coped if I had brought a stranger home to stay overnight no matter how in need she was.

I had to turn her down - she was in tears and obviously desperate for a place to spend the night. I offered her sleeping bag/air bed etc if she can find somewhere to go but I feel helpless as I couldn't help her.

My DH is supposed to be away with work this week and if he had been away she could have come, but as he is here I honestly had no choice.

I don't have the money to pay for her to have a night in a b&b or anything, and she clearly doesn't have the money either.

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MNHQ

AmyGMumsnet · 24/10/2016 22:04

Hi all,

Thanks for the reports about this thread.

We're going through and removing any posts that we feel break our Talk Guidelines.

We won't tolerate disablist posts and we'd be really grateful if folks could consider the challenges that many families of people with disabilities, or those who have disabilities themselves, face on a daily basis.

Mumsnet exists to make parent's lives easier and if there's one thing we could all do with, it's some understanding and moral support.

Thanks everyone Flowers

MNHQ

KatherineMumsnet · 26/10/2016 15:45

Hi all,

Thanks for the reports.

We did indeed remove some posts because of the term 'autist'. While it may well be OK to some, it's really not to others, and especially when teamed with the word 'pet', we had so many reports that we decided it was best all-round to remove the posts.

To clarify, we are by no means calling anyone disablist, however the posts were reported for the use of disablist language and in this instance we did agree.

If you have any feedback on this, please do let us know.

MNHQ

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet · 27/10/2016 12:01

Hi everyone
Can we just be clear that when we delete a post reported for breaking our Talk Guidelines, any subsequent posts repeating the words in the deleted post may be deleted, too?

MNHQ

YetAnotherHelenMumsnet · 27/10/2016 20:07

Hi all,
We're continuing to get this thread reported, but we're just going to try to keep going as we have been and take each report on its merits. Wrt the example above, we would probably delete someone saying 'pet gay' as well, fwiw, because it's just a bit goady, but it would probably rely on the context.

MNHQ

YetAnotherHelenMumsnet · 27/10/2016 20:33

Hi Statistically,
A lot of what we do requires taking the temperature of the thread, to be honest. You can see from this thread that we aren't deleting it as a matter of course, but we won't rule out deleting it again if it comes up on another thread. Sorry not to be more explicit, but we try to take things on their merits. Smile

MNHQ

YetAnotherHelenMumsnet · 27/10/2016 23:18

Please don't do anything in anger, Papaver. We can continue to talk about this tomorrow by all means; we can see your point and nevertheless have to take a broader view in deleting. (As to your more recent posts, we'll delete the more swearie of the two but just because you told someone else to fuck off, not because you told us to.)

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