To be a bit judgey about these parents?

[FedupofbeingtoldIcantusemyname]

Last night Dp and I went to an event with some of his friends.

Said event was being held at the next big city, so a 2+hr drive there and back.

A few of the people we went with decided to bring their kids along, which would be fine and fair enough except for the fact that the event in question was being held until late at night, outside in the rain and cold, with literally nothing for the kids to do. It was not a child friendly kind of event at all, all of the kids were under 5, one was only about 6 months.

By the end, just before we left, one of the mothers (who I didn't know) was just shouting at the kids to be quiet and stop fighting because they were so bored they were just lashing out at each other.

Aibu to be a bit judgey about them taking their kids along to this event? I mean I'm all for living your life and not stopping everything you enjoy just because you have kids but I really felt that this event was not the right place for such young kids to be and the parents should have either gotten a babysitter or just not gone. Aibu?

Dp and I go to a lot of these shows, and sometimes we bring Dss. No issue with taking kids to these kinds of shows, just not this particular ones given the circumstances.

Sorry x-post when you said it was a car show. What an odd thing to do generally!? I personally can't imagine wanting to go out in the dark/rain/cold to a car park with people revving their engines, sounds really strange. Each to their own though I suppose - some people might not like the music festivals we take our kids to.

But a baby with no shoes and socks on late/cold/wet - that isn't about whether you should take kids along that's just really poor parenting (regardless of venue!), as is shouting at them. Both examples are separate issues as to whether they should be there - if they were appropriately dressed and fed and looked after and parented well then going along with the parents to something is fine (still a very odd sounding event though!!).

I guess it depends on the meet up.

My DD has went to a few of those with her uncle, he's in a group or whatever they call themselves. Although she was dressed for the weather and there were some other kids there.

Unless it's illegal street races I think YABU

Yes, I agree moomoo its not really my kind of thing but dp and dss enjoy it so I tag along!

6 month old cold was just silly

6 month wrapped warm in sling or pram, perfectly fine

Yes, YABU. Not every aspect of family life is or should be 'child friendly. It is a ridiculous expectation.

How old is your DSS?

YABU. Not every aspect of family life is or should be 'child friendly. It is a ridiculous expectation.

^this^

I wouldn't expect that every occasion should be child friendly, but I just felt that this one was very family unfriendly.

How late is 'late'? Apologies if I've missed it. 9pm for dsd (5) wouldn't be late for a weekend, although he's not routinely up until 9 or 10 even at a weekend - as a one off he'd be fine. When he was 6 months he'd have slept and we'd have taken PJs and warm blankets etc for him to sleep in his buggy. Was the baby awake or asleep? We've always gone on the basis that if an event isn't marked 'adults only' then we'll behaved children are acceptable. The minute ds gets bored, tired or disruptive we leave - as I think most parents would.

Ds not dsd.

So which parent should have stayed at home? Maybe the mother didn't want to be at home with the kids. Maybe the father really wanted to go to the car show. But couldn't drive. Or they could have just wanted to do something together. If it's not your thing why doesn't your dp go alone.
I would have been more bothered about the fact that the kids weren't dressed for the weather. Than the fact that they were there.

Maybe it was. So what? The kids weren't harmed, were they?

I wouldnt judge, its their call not yours. All I would think is "rather you than me!" and be grateful I had got a sitter.

We were there till half 10.

All of the people could drive so that was not an issue. In fact, they all had multiple cars too!

If it had been a warm summers evening I probably would have felt differently but the kids were obviously bored, fed up and didn't want to be there.

the kids were obviously bored, fed up and didn't want to be there

You have just described about 60% of my childhood! Sometimes we all have to do things we dont want to do. Perhaps the parents didnt realise how child unfriendly this event would be, you live and learn.

And half ten, plus travel time, is fine during half term if they can lie in the next day.

Ok, fair enough, it seems IWBU!

We had one of these evening meet up car events locally to us recently, it was featured in our local paper as police were involved and there was some sort of standoff. Ultimately some damage was caused.
I'm not saying that all of these types of events end up being like this, but this particular one was definitely not child friendly.

I wouldn't judge, but I'm always a bit surprised when people can be bothered to drag kids to an event in the evening. Always seems more bother than it's worth.

You're going to get lots of people who think that once you have DCs, it's unreasonable to ever even consider doing anything without them ever again, and the rest of the world should be made 'child friendly' rather than parents do stuff without their DCs on occasion, but personally, I find that mentality depressing. (And those are the parents who don't seem to cope very well when their DCs grow up and don't want to spend every minute with them)

I actually think the 6 month old would be the only one I would take - stick them in a buggy, push them around and if you have one who'll sleep in a buggy, it'd be fine. It's the older DC who really should be left at home with a sitter. Perhaps they misunderstood how unchildfriendly it would be, but then the timing should have given that away.

You sound like you spent more time checking what they were wearing/doing etc than you did actually enjoying the event.

It may or may not have been reasonable of them but it isn't actually anything to do with you. HTH

We were standing around for a long time Livia

But yeah, fair enough.

Half past 10?!

Think you save your parenting judging for serious issues like child neglect, not a misjudgement of event.

Was this actually an official organised car show or street racing event? It sounds like the latter to me.