A car parking thread and an argument. Who was right?

[PetraParka]

I'm adding a picture to make it a bit easier to understand.

yesterday I had to withdraw money from the cash point at a nearby smallish supermarket and had dd (2) with me.
I parked in the spot marked with a star.
Got back in the car.
All the parking spots were filled apart from number 4. The cars on the right were parked there illegally. As I started reversing, I got just past the jeep type car and a bmw driver whizzes in and parks in the spot marked with a square. Initially I thought I'd reverse into there and then drive on, but didn't think anything of it and realised I'd have to reverse all the way out of the park because I had no space to do a 3 point turn.

So I got to where the taxi was parked and a woman comes to my door and taps on it. I put the window down and she says "did you just shake your head at me" aggressively. I was completely shocked because I had no idea who she was or why I'd shake my head. It was like she was spoiling for a fight. I said "no why would i shake my head at you?" Then she got a bit intimidating and looked at me and said "yeah ok, because it looked like you did". I replied "don't be silly, can't you see I'm trying to drive out of here, why would I be shaking my head at you, what's your problem?" Then she got aggressive again and started F-ing and blinding, and I told her to fuck off and the only reason she was being so aggressive was because I was wearing a headscarf..she scoffed at this and ran into the shop.

My legs were shaking and I felt vulnerable. Later on I realised she might have been the person who parked in the spot but I didn't even acknowledge that. She was spoiling for a fight and I feel it was because I was wearing a headscarf.

Anyway, sorry for the long thread, but was I right to reverse out like this? As I had no space to do a 3 point turn? And why would someone come out of nowhere and start asking you if you shook your head at them aggressively?

What's your headscarf got to do with it? A Muslim headscarf?

I am a bit shocked you told her to fuck off as it seems to be really letting yourself down speaking to someone like that.

Neither of you were right. No, she should not have been so aggressive towards you but you lost the moral high ground the moment you told her to fuck off. Childish behaviour breeds childish behaviour.

And there is absolutely nothing in your OP that supports your belief that her behaviour was motivated in whole or in part because you wear a headscarf. If she was "spoiling for a fight" the fact that you wore a headscarf is irrelevant.

You lost any moral high ground you may have had when you started insulting and swearing at her in response to her question.

Annie and Alice

Read the OP properly please. OP says:

Then she got aggressive again and started F-ing and blinding, and I told her to fuck off

If someone tells me to fuck off then I'll tell them to fuck off too. Fuck the moral high ground. That's how these people get away with behaving less this.

Go and read 'be less polite thread'

And OP, i get why you think it may have been your headscarf. Alot of people see women in headscarves as easy targets, thinking they're subservient or some bullshit. Well done for challenging her.

Marvellous diagram, OP.

I would guess she got aggressive for one of two reason. Either she was defensive (defensively aggressive? Oh, you know what I mean!) because she knew she had no right to park in a disabled bay, or she has a hidden disability and was fed up of people looking at her as though she shouldn't be parking there. She sounds so aggressive I'd be inclined to go with the first option.

Thank you for your helpful advice, tofutti, but I did read the OP properly. I know exactly what the OP posted and I stand by my comment. She could have chosen to be the adult in the situation and left without exchanging obscenities but she did not. She instead chose the childish route.

That's how these people get away with behaving less this.

No, it is not my fault that someone else has poor manners nor is it my responsibility to call them on their poor behaviour - I am not their mother. I refuse to rise to their baiting.

She was probably the driver of the car that parked in the disabled bay and thought you were shaking your head at her using it. If she had an invisible disability she might be fed up of being judged and taken it out on you. Not that that's okay, but she could've had a bad day and this perceived slight took her over the edge.

None of this excuses her behaviour though, and I doubt it was anything to do with your head scarf.

Fair enough Annie. I've come across too many aggressive idiot drivers (mostly male). I now roll my window down and have at them. Otherwise I just regret it later for not having stood up to them.