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Birthday blues

7 replies

OneTreeHilled · 18/10/2016 22:51

I'm not after anything really just need to vent somewhere.
Today is my birthday, wasn't looking forward to it and have been feeling down for a while, and my partner knows this.
He already gave me my present 3 weeks ago (I like to have presents on the day so was disappointed but it's not a big deal) but I was looking forward to a bit of a cheer up on the day from him and my sons (1yr and 2yr old) nothing big but the usual "look it's mummy's birthday" kinda thing and he also said we were going out for a meal with our boys.
He didn't even say happy birthday, took my eldest to nursery, went to college himself, didn't message me all day, came home late, didn't take us out, and my question of the day "can I ask why I've had no cards?"
His reply "oh I forgot"
Again it's not a big deal but to not have a card from my babies really hurts.
Sorry for rambling, I just needed to get it off my mind. XxX

OP posts:
boo2410 · 18/10/2016 23:02

Oh that's pants. Your DP (is he D today??) should have got you cards from all of them and at least a small present from the DC's. I would be feeling fed up too. I'm not a great one for birthdays but would feel royally pissed off if I didn't get a card, especially if my DC's were so young. It just means so much. My DS is 12 and I'm hoping he gets me a card next week, if I get a present as well I will be gobsmacked!!

Not much else I can say so Happy Birthday from me. Have some Wine and Cake andChocolate and Flowers

GnomeDePlume · 18/10/2016 23:07

Cake Flowers Chocolate

Happy Birthday

Whatever your age it is not unreasonable to expect your partner to mark your birthday.

How have you celebrated birthdays in other years? How do you mark your partner's birthday?

Is it possible that your partner decided not to mark your birthday because you were feeling down about it?

mymilkshakes00 · 18/10/2016 23:07

Happy birthday op. Flowers

Well you should make a big deal of it.
You need to tell him I want to go out for my bday. Or whatever it is you want.
If Dh doesn't make an effort then you should Defo make plans by yourself. Shopping , manicure pedi. Anything you enjoy.
Your dc are obviously too young and Dh should really be showing them how it should be done. But they will learn when they're older.

Gramgram · 18/10/2016 23:08

Happy Birthday. Birthdays do matter and it is nice to feel appreciated, maybe he can make up for it at the weekend by pampering you with tea and toast in bed etc. Drop hints, very big hints.

dirtywindows · 18/10/2016 23:18

Happy Birthday op. It sounds like you need to be up front with DH. Tell him you're upset and disappointed and what you'd like for future birthdays - pressies on the day, cards from kids, a meal cooked for you.... Maybe he wasn't being a dick - just not thinking. If he does it again LTB!

KC225 · 19/10/2016 01:45

Happy Birthday OP

Why did you accept the presents three weeks ago. You should have said 'No, I want them on the day or its not special' You say 'its no big deal' twice in your post but clearly it is or else why would you be posting. You need to be more vocal about what matters to you.

It's rubbish he forgot but did you not ask where you were going out to eat? What time he had booked a table? If you should ask someone to babysit etc. What about cards/gifts from family and friends? Was there really no clue that it was your birthday?

SplendidPanda · 19/10/2016 02:56

Happy Birthday!!

I think some men just do not get birthdays. You have to spell out in very very clear terms exactly what you want, probably multiple times (which takes away some of the special-ness and does make you wish that they'd just get it).

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