Really object to DH "babysitting"

[talcam]

This drives me up the pole, if I ever manage to escape for a night to be faced with the repeated question "Is your husband babysitting then?" No he just happens to be at home with his children. Do you think he has ever been asked if I am at home babysitting?

Argh I get this too when I am working weekends etc. I detest it so much even though he does act like it is babysitting too. I feel like I have to tell him what to do and when to feed them as most of the time I come home and he hasn't shifted all day and kids haven't eaten.

But I say "No he is looking after his own children today!" even though perhaps "yes" would be closer to the truth .

In fairness to my DH it isn't a phrase that he has ever used in reference to himself. It is the whole implication that he is doing me a favour by staying in whilst his wayward wife goes out for once.

lol at where are the kids.

Last night sil came over just as we were getting ready to go out for a dvd and take away. Ds was on floor with jammies and hat on ready to be shipped to bed when we got home.
Sil asked...you taking the wee man????

Well no i was going to leave him sitting on the floor playing with that brush while we both nipped out

I'm with you on this one. Don't have any sprogs of my own (until June) but I know a couple of women whose partners 'babysit' the children. Like it's not just their job! I don't suppose it's so bad if it's a phrased used for both of you, it's when the man is 'babysitting' and the women is just being a mum.

It's because it's used about men more than women that I object to it.

Nobody ever asks me if I'm babysitting the boys when DH is at work. But on a Sunday, when I'm at work, DH is, apparently, babysitting them.

Why?

actually, I DO occasionally get it the other way round - dh has a regular Friday night commitment (evening class) which clashes with me going out with people from work on a semi-regular piss-up.

If MIL isn't available to babysit, & I cry off night out because dh's thing comes first, workies will quite often comment that 'Raven won't be out, she's babysitting'.

Maybe because I work f-t &/or earn slightly more than dh?

my BF hubby - if asked by my own dh - to go out for pint - he says cant - have to babysit

my dh says -dont be an arse - you arent babysitting - you are looking after your own children

it pisses me off,and myBF and my dh

so YANBU

This drives me mad too. There was a brilliant riposte dh remembered from a very old Peter Sellers film, which I have since used.

"Dh babysitting?"

"No, I've left them on their own with a precariously balanced oil heater" (exit stage left)

Babysitting is looking after someone else's child. Looking after your own children is parenting.

I got all frosty with one of DH's old workmates over this once. He was not happy.

YANBU AT ALL!!

This is one of my pet hates (there are a few ) - it drives me potty!! Of course you can't 'babysit' your own child ...arrrrrggghhhh

Woudn't irritate me at all- if it was the phrase automatically meeting a father when he went out to see his mates: 'oh, so your wife is baby-sitting?'. The irritating bit is that it doesn't.

People used to say this to me when the children were younger.But they used to say it to DH as weel. It didn't bother either of us.

LOL at all these!!!

And YANBU but frankly I don;'t think it even needs saying!

I have this too. An elderly neighbour of ours will always ask where the kids are if he sees me on my own. If I say they're with my dh, he replies, "Oh, so it's his DUTY day then"!

Does annoy me, especially that generation who think a man can't possibly get anything out of spending time with his children!

I thought I was the only one who got annoyed by this. Every time I dare to leave the house someone says something about dh babysitting. I always say he's not babysitting, he's looking after his son. Needless to say noone ever asks dh if I'm babysitting when he goes out as obviously I'm just being a mum.

Yep. It's up there with people talking about men "helping out" round the house. Like it's only my job and he's doing me a favour.

i also get annoyed when dh says that he tries to 'help' as much as he can with the domestic chores. um, if he's 'helping' then surely the workload must be all my responsibility he gets annoyed if i point this out. says i'm being pedantic. bloody cheek!

ps good idea to revive this v v v old thread

great minds, clam

I have a male friend who says this all the time. I drives me mad! They are his children, not some stangers kids he's minding!