Family organised party in our home without consulting me and DH

[DibDobs2020]

Is that weird? We were invited when we had finished work. They said they'd have dinner ready for us when we got in. And to be fair Mum was looking after our kids for part of the evening. But they arranged to all come to our house - cousins, aunties, bros - without asking us first. When I asked why they were coming to us it was because my bros house 'was a bit of a mess'. Nice to have a family so comfortable around us...but still....is it odd....or am I becoming upright in my middle age.....

Maybe I'm unusual but I'd really like this. I don't see my extended family often enough and to have a party organised, without having to do any of the cooking and tidying up, would be bliss.

I wouldn't like being invited to a party in my own home, (unless it was a surprise party for me or suchlike).

Who was the party for? And why didn't they check whether it was OK with you first? They must have known before the day that they were planning to use your house for a party.

I can see that it might have happened if your mum was organising it & was at your place with your kids.

But to not ask you first?

That's odd imo.

Does she have a habit of treating your house as hers??

Oh no, no, no, I would not like this. Thin end of the wedge. Sounds like DB volunteered your house so he didn't have to tidy up his house or deal with it all. Cheeky fucker. "Oh don't worry DM, I won't mind the mess at DBs"

You've said no now I think? Good. Go out the back door and leave the key in turned inside the front so they can't surprise you.

Sounds like to me they minded the kids,so they could have the party there.Its hard to say no when they are doing you a favour[in their eyes].

Have they got form for this.

We had that one Christmas dinner. We were the last to be told it was at our house.
And yes, person who decided did expect us to do it all.
Move on a couple of years and they were hosting and they announced that they couldn't be expected to pay for everything so they'd split the cost... That'll be £50 please. I responded rapidly with an email to all that said we would bring exactly what they had provided when they'd come to us. They didn't respond.

No, no, no and no again. Not on and very arrogant of them.

OK, admittedly I am not a party animal. Anyone who organised a party in my house, particularly without even asking me (answer would be no anyway) would not set foot in it again, at least not for a very long time.

Would annoy the fuck out of me, who wants to come home from a day at work to a house full!

I had a friend similar, we let her stay for 2 weeks free of charge when she was between houses, one night she was babysitting our DD and arranged a dinner party for her friends at ours, without asking.

Change the locks
Close the curtains

What was the party for?

It's only appropriate to invite people to your own house, not someone else's.

Tell them you've become nudists, and are having a special nudist meal that night.

jaxhog good plan! I did say no to the party but I've just been feeling mean ever since. Feel much better after reading comments here. They are a lovely family just sometimes a bit ......er.....forceful. sundance01 think you are right - not worth a big scene. But very glad i put my foot down. Laid back is one thing.....doormat is quite another.

I also think it's quite nice. Although when my grandma passed away we put up some relatives from abroad because we were the only ones with space. We did then end up as family central, which did get a bit much (after a few days). I would be ok with it as long as it didn't happen too often.