To have called her out on this?

[flamboyantfolly]

NC as this will out me. Don't particularly give two hoots if the person involved reads this, just don't want them going back through my old posts.

I found out I was pregnant on Thursday. It was a huge shock and I was trying to process it all. On Friday I began bleeding, lightly at first but has gotten heavier. I am fairly convinced this is a miscarriage, I've had one before and this feels exactly the same.

Last night on a group I am on on Facebook they did a wave of light for pregnancy and infant loss. I haven't told anyone what I am going through other than DP, but I made a post saying I would be lighting a candle and talking about what I am going through.

I didn't realise that someone I knew was on the group until she commented with a shocked face. She then posted a status on her FB profile about how she doesn't know what to make or what she sees and that she doesn't know if she can mentally cope with it. She has form for making ambiguous statuses. I brushed it off but was a bit that it had come so soon after seeing my post. She received the usual 'You ok Hun?' replies and replied back to someone saying that everytime she has something to celebrate (she is almost 6 months pregnant) something comes along and bursts her bubble, and that she'd tell the person who responded all about it when she saw her.

Maybe I am just upset and irrational, but this made me fume . This isn't the first time she's taken something I have said or done and made an ambiguous status from it.

I couldn't hold my tongue and I, perhaps stupidly, fired off a reply on my original post saying sorry I had inconvenienced her and well done for making it all about her. This obviously devolved into a bit of a spat in the replies. She bought up that we weren't planning to get pregnant (like this matters?) and called me selfish and delusional and that the status was nothing to do with me.

AUBu to have done this? I just felt it was the straw that broke the camels back. I understand my post may have shaken her but maybe a direct message to me would have been more prudent.

Feel a bit about the whole thing today.

Have you had yourself checked over yet? I bled all through my pregnancy, despite having had two previous miscarriages.

Ignore the FB stuff, far more important things to be dealing with. Maybe it was about you, maybe it wasn't. You can't change that, you can just look after you.

Whatever the truth of the situation, it is incredibly nasty of both her and her mother to start slinging insults at a woman who is going through a miscarriage. Get them both out of your life forever.

Original, I went to the Drs when the bleeding started and he checked everything over, said to rest and if things got any worse to go back. The bleeding has since gotten heavier and I have passed some clots (sorry for the TMI).

Fairly certain this is what it is, but not really sure where I go from here. Last time the EPU took bloods to measure Hcg but nothing of the same has happened this time, so was going to revisit doctors on Monday.

Can you delete her? To be honest, it sounds like it was aimed at you. As others have said, the shocked face is just insensitive and then if you had misinterpreted, she would have been mortified and should have taken steps to reassure you as its obvious you'll be upset and hurt. She didn't do that. Regardless of whether you misinterpreted, she's been v insensitive.

I suspect she has lots of people she knows thinking that status was about them. Passive aggressive. Can't stand it. Good for you pulling her up on in, even though it may not have been aimed at you. She was probably aiming it at multiple people. It's a twatty thing to do. I've come off FB but before I did had quite a severe block/defriend policy. Basically anyone who darkened my day with:

1. passive aggressive posts like your friend's
2. racist/homophobic/sexist or any ist comments/memes
3. Constant moaning about their life/the weather/neighbours etc etc.

Any of this shit got them defriended (after putting up with it for years). Quite cathartic to come off it for good now because I was subconsciously comparing myself to others and becoming increasingly worried about not being included in things. Not good for a balanced state of mind.

She sounds like a couple of "friends" I have jettisoned in the past because of just this type of immature attention seeking victim status behaviour

Cut her loose and think no more of it. I am sorry about your miscarriage

Her mum has also weighed in in the comments saying that 'some people' (I.e. Me) are pathetic and need to get a grip on reality 

Yes I agree your daughter really should get a grip and see that she has a healthy pregnancy to be happy about. I wonder if she gets her negative attitude from you?

I can't quite get my head around her FB comments - does she really mean that she shouldnt have to hear about someone elses miscarriage because she is pregnant and it upsets her? Is that it?

I've been pregnant whilst friends have experienced miscarriages and miscarried when others have been pregnant. You support one another or you're not a friend, thats the point of being friends!

Cull her from your friendship group and dont look back.

FWIW I bled throughout my second pregnancy - clots included - you know your body best and the hospital will be able to give you more information. .

Go to the hospital or see the midwife and see if you can have a scan.

I'd ditch her, myself. You don't need people like that in your life.

So sorry for your loss, OP.

Dfriend and block.

I suspect that status was about you but even if it wasn't she was very insensitive to do a shocked emoji rather than contact you and express sympathy.

Her and her mother sound cut from the same cloth- an unpleasant one.

I'm so sorry for your loss .

Distressing time for you, so sorry 💐

She's a dick. Block her and don't bother with her anymore and surround yourself with people you love. Be kind to yourself at the moment x

I bet it was about you as well, she just wasn't prepared for you pulling her up on it. Delete and block her. Life is too short.

I had a 'friend' who kept deleting me from group conversations. Not her place to in the slightest as I had been part of the convo and she took it upon herself to remove me.

After the 3rd time I deleted her. A while later I got texts from her as she had heard from a mutual friend that I wasn't happy. I told her about the deleting and she apparently couldn't remember. Luckily for her, I remembered each one and told her. I then got some shit excuse about her being hormonal and taking it out on me, like that was perfectly acceptable. No apology. I haven't bothered with her since.