AIBU? Kids party etiquette

[Partypooper4]

DS is having his first ever birthday party this year, he will be turning 4. We are having it at local softplay straight after nursery at 12. I was only going to invite the children from his room at nursery (6/7 kids) and pay for them to have lunch and play. That's it. Will be cake and party bags. It's on a Thursday. We don't have tons of money to throw at a party but he really wants one.

One of my close friends has massively lost her shit with me saying how dare I not invite her daughter (aged 2) I backtracked and said I hadn't sent invites out yet. But AIBU? She won't be able to come anyway as both parents work on a Thursday. My two DDs aren't coming as I've sourced childcare specifically so I can concentrate on DS. She's saying she's invited us to all her little girls parties (big extravagant events) he's 4 though and will be with his friendship group. She's also said why would I do it on a Thursday but my view is it's a lot quieter at soft play so not so overwhelming also cheaper. Grandparents are on holiday and his dad can't get the day off work.

I've never ever thrown a kids birthday party before so I'm not sure on etiquette here. His friends that are in school aren't coming but their mums haven't taken offence.

I pointed out that I did invite them to his birthday meal with close family and friends but she's ignoring that.

What should I do? Send an invite just to keep her calm or stand my ground? We don't see her little girl that often really (maybe once a month for an hour)

Glad you checked to make sure there wouldn't be any problems on the day serving your cake. Enjoy your party!

Of course you oughtn't invite her - the mum sounds hard work!

They couldn't come on a Thursday anyway, but obviously she still wants the invitation and then to make a huge fuss about the day being inconvenient

Life's too short to be bothered with these draining people.

I wouldn't invite her as it's just for your son's nursery friends. At £6.50 per head for a place that your friend knows that she won't be able to attend anyway... No wonder that you only see her for an hour every so often. She sounds like hard work to me!

Stick to your guns. She sounds very difficult and the kind of friendship you can afford to lose. Your little boy sounds like a poppet - don't let this put a dampener on the party for you.

Also echoing stick to your guns.

YANBU. But if it makes it easier give her a party invite and if she wants to rearrange her day/take time off work to come then she can. Tbh she sounds like the kind of friend who will cause you no end of headaches throughout your DC's childhood. Might be to just quietly distance yourself from her.