AIBU to expect her dad to visit her in hospital?

[MadameJosephine]

3yo DD broke her arm yesterday afternoon. Nursery called both me and her dad and we took her to A&E together. Once she had been X rayed and we were told she would need to be kept in and operated on in the morning XDP went home telling me to 'keep him posted'. I've been with her here overnight. She's has had her arm pinned now and I'm hoping we will be discharged this evening but if not she'll be in for another night. When I rang him to update him on how the op went he just again said 'ok keep me posted, I'll see her on Saturday' (his normal contact).

AIBU to think this is crappy and he should be coming to see her?

Is he at work?

Is he avoiding the hospital because he doesn't want to see you now that the emergency is over? Do you normally avoid each other if possible?

Does she need both of you there?

Eevee he's self employed and actually sent me a message by mistake earlier that was meant for his new partner telling her he would be finished and home shortly after lunch

YES! its not nice! My dd was in hospital recently and dh popped in loads! Not local to us - not convenient either! Of course it would be nice if he said - Can I visit again and is there anything YOU need? Can I take over? Of course!!!!!

Six no the split was amicable and we are on reasonably good terms

Nap, perhaps not but considering I am still wearing yesterday's knickers and have had 4 hours sleep it would be nice

Top dad there, lunch with new partner trumps hospitalised child!

In that case he has no excuse. He should st the very least take over watching dd for a few hours whilst you pop home, have a shower and get something to eat.

Op I you need a break to dash home and I expect you do, You need to text him to ask him.

ask him

Just text him and say "need you to step in this afternoon so I can get some rest, who time shall I expect you?" And see what he says.

my dh took a few hours out to let me go home, change shower and grab some things.

Tell him

yeah text what nap queen said and make it clear you WONT be there

Doctor has just been to see her and it looks like we'll be going home in a couple of hours so I'll be able to get a shower and an early night.

To be honest I'm ok coping by myself I just was a bit taken aback when he said see you Saturday, maybe I was a bit unreasonable but it just seemed odd to me to not want to see her

It is rubbish, my ex would be much the same. DS has severe allergies and asthma and I once rushed him into hospital when he had an attack. I text his Dad with all the details, which hosp etc ( in the situation easier than phoning) and could see he had read my message. He called 12 hours later, because apparently that was the first chance he'd had to make a call?!! Hmmm.

My 16 year old DD was about to undergo life saving open heart surgery. ( She's been getting more and more unwell for a year and was more or less bedridden until it was found out what the problem was and what gave her the best chance of survival. Her father, my exdh, phoned her as she was preparing to go to theatre. He announced he'd 'do his best' to be there for her but it depended how busy he was at work!
You have my sympathy, someone once told me that you see the real character of a person during the big crisis in life