Really really long story with a few conflicts so I will try to condense. Two very good friends. Myself and friend 1 are in our 30's. Friend 2 is in 20's, 2 small children. Her partner is the local drug dealer, horrible man, vile but I love her to pieces despite my husbands firm objections. We don't come from that "world" at all so my husband can't understand why I would be friends with her and have my name associated with him. Her partner has been arrested, charged and convicted of several violent crimes. Myself and friend 1 have helped her move homes, support her etc to leave him several times the last 4 years. Herself and 2 girls have even stayed with us on a few occasions. About 5 months ago he attacked her, trashed and I mean trashed her house, broke girls toys, urinated on their bedding etc. There was cocaine everywhere. The girls were there. He was arrested and sectioned under the mental health act. She refused to press charges and within 4 days she was back in contact with him and telling everyone he was better. Social services said all was good as he was in mental health accommodation. He was out within a week as it became clear to professionals that his problems were severe addiction, anger and control and there was no definitive mental health problem. He's just a bully. It came out that she is not as innocent as claimed and was helping him with his "buissines". At this point her family said they could no longer have contact with her and I should do the same. I could not despite husbands wish I would, but I would keep her closest family member informed between them and I, which I have done. Friend 2 pulled away from friend 1. Friend 1 constantly wanted me to tell her things friend 2 was telling me as she believes it's her right to know. I was very uncomfortable with this as I believe it is friend 2's choice who she confides in. The only person who imho who has a "right" to know is the close family member. Lots of other stuff in between. Anyway yesterday friend 2 rang to say he had punched her in the face, she was pressing charges, it was over etc, she was staying with one of his family members and had gone on a dating website, all in the same day! Obv a lot more has happened in the last few years and there's a lot more to this. I rang her family member who is not convinced as we have heard all this before and she always drops the charges and goes back to him. They dont believe any of it. So my dilemma is, I have my husband once again telling me to stay out of it, not get involved. I have her family telling me that if we all cut her off then she has to finally take responsibility rather than letting us do everything and then blame us to him when they get back together. I also have the issue of friend 1 not knowing any of this and when she finds out I fear losing our friendship of 10 years. Bit of a mess at the moment! Heart is telling me to do everything I can to help her as this is my nature and I love the girls to pieces but head is telling me to stay away, it will cause more problems in the long run, I risk other friendships and my relationship with my husband but I just don't feel comfortable leaving my really good friend and her 2 small children to just "get on with it". Really stuck, aibu to continue to keep what friend 2 tells me from friend 1 and aibu to want to keep trying to help my friend and her children or do I keep my distance even though I know she will start to rely heavily on me again. She is not a good friend in return and lies and manipulates constantly but I can't help feel this is down to him and if she was finally to get away from him she would be a new person. Then again I don't trust her and I don't trust the situation and I know the right thing for me is to walk away it's just, I guess, I will then feel like a terrible person who has let a friend down. Could just do with some outside perspective. Thankyou.