to wonder why my neighbour is always wanting to busy me?

[user1474926891]

My next door neighbour and I are friends and have children at the same school (she has three DC and I have two).

She's currently on maternity leave. I work from home while DC are at school, with weekends off.

Every time we see each other, leaving the houses, were have brief chats. She always asks if I'm busy, I say I am, but she regularly comments that it must be nice working at home and maybe I should do some voluntary work at the school too. I always say I don't have the time. I work during school hours!

Anyway, this is an ongoing theme. She's always hinting that I should be busier.

Today, for example, DC, dog and I were coming back from long walk woodland walk. On her doorstep the neighbour commented that it was good to see me being "Active". But, I walk 6 miles a day, during weekdays, and she knows this.

I'm often 'out and about', work Mon to Fri and exercise etc.

Why would she feel the need to 'busy' me up?

Some people have the (wrong!) idea that working from home means you are on a skive! I work from home one day a week (in the office the other 4 days), I have a very busy job, and it can be challenging getting people to understand that I'm WORKING from home - not just got my feet up watching telly! They also don't understand that when you work from home you can arrange your day differently so you're not running to the same schedule as most people.

Sounds like she doesn't quite understand the concept of working from home and is under the misguided impression that you have lots of free time and should be doing more - when actually you're already very busy! There could very well be some underlying jealousy there. Bottom line - she doesn't understand your lifestyle because it doesn't fit with what she considers to be the "norm"; your schedule isn't one that she can relate to and therefore doesn't appreciate just how busy you are.

[grins] Ahh 'work'

Reminds me of a comment my sil made when my bro was working away and she was taking care the kids. It isn't 'work' if you're 'just hanging around' all day/night chasing rabbits".

He works as a self employed security guard, usually based out in the middle of nowhere with just him and the guy he rotates shifts with. No TV/Wifi/Internet and no other sign of life. Very basic facilities in the 'office' portcabin which includes one sofa they take turns sleeping on.
I found it hilarious but literally all he does is walk around the building checking security when the motion sensors go off each time the rabbits/ducks/other critters come out to play!

She enjoys the money too much to agree to him getting a different job, but at the same time will hound him for having all this 'freedom' whilst she's at home doing all the childcare. Apparently he should be able to take kids to work with him during weekends and any holidays under the guise of 'camping'

She's a tit.
I have three dc and a full time job, I'm out of the house a minimum of 12 hours a day in the week and our weekends are non stop housework, laundry, grocery shopping, kids. And yet someone I know keeps telling me I should do an evening class/ go back to being a school governor/ take up a sport, as if I spend my whole life sitting on my arse. She is also a tit. I now just stare at her and don't answer.

My friend has this, she works fulltime as an independent consultant based from home and all her school mum friends try to continuously get her to give free childcare after school and in the holidays. They simply refuse to understand that she is actually working and dealing with clients etc... It drives her nuts!

I think it's "anything other than wot I do" isn't real work.
joff you've posted about your work before, you sit around eating biscuits, right?

Start challenging her on it every single time, she will soon get fed up of having to explain herself.

"Which part of I am working dont you understand"?
" I dont have time for a college course, I am working all day"
"I have been to uni I dont feel the need to do any college courses while I am working full time thanks, do you want to do one"?
"Have you been looking at college courses, is that why you keep mentioning it"?
"Oh walking 6 miles a day every weekday isnt active enough for you? How far did you walk today?"
"I have a very busy life thanks, between work and play and kids we have a great life, hows yours?"

Keep it up until she has run out of stupid questions and remarks to make which she cannot back up. She is trying to belittle your life cos she is jealous and thinks 'working at home' is not really hard, there is something in her life she feels is missing and is taking out her frustration by making PA comments to you. Dont let her continue to do this, its not necessary and verging on harrassment.

Don't mind me my mum used to describe my dad's job as 'shuffling papers'

In her possible defence, if she is looking forward to going back to work it's because she hates being at home all day. And she thinks that you hate it too and is offering you the solutions that she'd choose if she was 'stuck' in your position. She is suggesting you do things that would get you out of the house, like volunteering at the school and an evening class. She 'complimented' you on being out for a walk. She could just think you want to get out more and doesn't understand that perhaps your lifestyle suits you.

ExMiL was like this. ExH was in the merchant marine and when he was at home on leave having been away at sea for months she would ask him when he was going to get a job .

Some folks just think that "work" means a particular thing, and "not work" as they define it is laziness.

Have a little moan to her one day about how your great auntie Mabel is annoying the hell out of you because she can't grasp that working from home and working part time involves real work. Mabel keeps trying to suggest things you might do during the day to keep you busy. Honestly, it's driving you potty. Mabel just doesn't understand the modern world!"