Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU To assume people tell fibs to their Dr about how much they drink?

289 replies

Diel · 26/09/2016 18:36

I went to see my GP recently and he asked how much alcohol I drink, I was about to give my usual 14 units answer but decided to tell the truth and say about 3 bottles of wine a week. GP looked horrified and told me I absolutely must stop this. This isn't news to me as I know it's more that I should drink but he then asked if it's because I can't sleep, um, no, it's because I love wine. Anyhow, surely I'm not alone? Or do people just not admit to this vice?

OP posts:
NoCakeLeft · 27/09/2016 01:12

I don't really drink much (2-3 bottles of strawberry lime cider once in 2-3 month), so don't have to lie.

RattieOfCatan · 27/09/2016 01:35

DH and I tell the truth and they don't believe us Hmm then we get lectures about drinking despite the fact that we rarely drink! I think that HCPs find it easier to believe that people are teetotal than to believe that people only have a couple of glasses of wine a week at most.

At one of my last midwife appointments the midwife joked that we're almost reaching a point where DH needs to make sure he doesn't drink and is ready to get me to hospital (I was about 28 weeks at the time, now 34!) And she didn't believe me at all when I said that isn't an issue. Since January he has had one night out to celebrate uni being over and apart from the alcohol consumed on that occasion (still not much) I can count using my fingers the glasses of wine he's had. It's even more fun now that he's in a job with a zero tolerance for alcohol consumption and who do regular checks! At least we can blame the job now!

Ludoole · 27/09/2016 01:47

I dont tell the truth because i know i drink too much. Ive stopped drinking in the week now but for months i was drinking between 50 and 60 pints a week. I realised i had an issue and now i drink weekends only and alternate my drinks with non alcoholic ones.

Threebedsemii · 27/09/2016 01:53

Sayings anyone who drinks more than the recommended limit of 14 (?) units a week has no "intelligence, common sense, or sense of responsibility" is so ridiculously stupid and uneducated that I can't believe Anyone would defend it.

Be hysterical all you want. Don't expect others not the challenge you on it. If you can't tell the difference between someone who drinks more than the recommended limit and a problem drinker you have little to add to a thread about alcohol consumption.

Threebedsemii · 27/09/2016 01:54

Donotblame- no one said it was a full bottle to themselves, they said it was 3 bottles a week. Not that they sat there 3 times and steady worked there way through a full bottle before clocking off

AverageGayLadAtChristmas · 27/09/2016 02:05

I can't drink and my GP knows this so I don't even get asked Grin

OlennasWimple · 27/09/2016 02:06

We told the truth about our alcohol consumption when we were being assessed to adopt, and nearly got turned down because the medical advisor assumed that we had lied so increased our consumption in his head and decided it was too high...

nooka · 27/09/2016 02:07

My MIL didn't think she was a heavy drinker even though she drank at least a bottle of wine on her own every day. She was dead at 50. My niece had liver failure and spent her last days in a unit full of people who had or were effectively killing themselves with alcohol. It was very sad (niece had cycle cell anemia and didn't drink at all).

If you are regularly drinking a large amount but consider yourself unaffected by it that's not a good sign. Your tolerance may be a sign you are a functioning alcoholic. Personally I enjoy a drink every now and then and if asked describe my habits relatively accurately - two or three small glasses of wine in an average week, with a couple of spirits added if I have a night out (once a month or so). I'd say I was a moderate drinker. I'd describe the OP and others with similar drinking habits as heavy drinkers, I'd be concerned if you were my relative or child.

wayway13 · 27/09/2016 02:08

I'm a non-drinker but, based on what I see on facebook, a lot of people drink way more than 14 units a week. I've got a few friends who can get through a bottle of wine each before a night out and they are fine the following day (whereas I got pissed on a large Baileys at Christmas). They either lie to their GPs or there are a lot of "horrified" GPs around.

AverageGayLadAtChristmas · 27/09/2016 02:26

The guys in my uni course, from what I've overheard, seem to go out most nights Confused

frikadela01 · 27/09/2016 02:32

Midwife though I was lying when I told her I can count on one hand the number of times I'd had a drink in the last year. I do enjoy a drink its just not something I do when I'm at home and don't really go out very often.
I must say though I agree with pp that I would consider what op drinks as more than a "moderate" drinker. There are a lot of people on my Facebook getting ready to do the stoptober thing and many have said how hard it will be, I've it to be honest if you consider not drinking alcohol for 30 days a challenge and something you'll find really hard then I would consider that havin a problem with alcohol.

BillSykesDog · 27/09/2016 03:12

I don't drink at all.

From working in an NHS toxicology service I know that most of the scientists there ignored the limits as they're set at a level which takes into account the possibility of someone with an unknown underlying health problem being able to drink without damage. In reality most healthy adults can drink quite a bit more than that without harm.

A lot of health professionals want to see the limits put up as they are so unrealistically low people ignore them, especially because almost everybody will know at least one person who regularly exceeds these limits without ill effect.

I'm not quite sure where all these innocent doctors are who are shocked at a bottle of wine a day so much they fall off their chair! Alcoholics on 3 bottles a day are relatively common occurrences and some people you can add a bottle of spirits on top of that!

BillSykesDog · 27/09/2016 03:16

Oh and lost your very sanctimonious post about it not being 'normal' isn't correct. The average amount drunk per week is just under the recommended amount, so just under half of all adults exceed them, do very normal I would say.

In fact if you take non-drinkers out of the equation probably the majority of drinkers exceed them.

StarryIllusion · 27/09/2016 05:04

No because I rarely drink. My salt intake on the other hand gets... edited slightly.

Miiow · 27/09/2016 09:32

Regsrdless whether the recommended levels are sensible or not it still seems weird to go to your doctor and lie about how much you drink. I'm also surprised at how many doctors 'lecture' their clients. I've never met a doctor who has lectured me or are people interpreting a simple reminder that they would feel better/loose weight or whatever as a lecture.

Butterfingering · 27/09/2016 09:40

Last time I went to the GP, she asked me how much I drink and I told the truth- nothing on school nights then one glass of wine and a couple of shorts on a Saturday night.

She spent most of the consultation telling me she didn't believe me.

Helpful.

daisymai08 · 27/09/2016 09:47

I used to drink 4/5 bottles a week, I told my Dr and he didn't bat an eyelid just said oh that's possibly a bit on the steep side.
I have lots of GP friends who DEFINITELY drink 3 bottles of wine a week - they're human too!!

daisymai08 · 27/09/2016 09:50

3 bottles of wine is 9 large glasses a week...that's average I'm sure!

lynniep · 27/09/2016 09:50

I didn't lie when I went last week, but then at the moment I don't drink that much. Maybe a bottle over a weekend. I probably would have lied back in my twenties, when it was more like a bottle a night.

YellowCrocus · 27/09/2016 09:56

I have never answered this question truthfully 😳. I have been worried about my alcohol intake recently and done some research. Apparently the best thing you can do is give yourself an extended break (at least two weeks) from alcohol every now and again. This allows your liver to regenerate.

The80sweregreat · 27/09/2016 09:59

i agree with through, yes, we say less or just lie because we know the lecture is coming - don't do this, don't do that. My theory is they all know that the NHS is properly doomed ( whoever is in charge) and they need to ram home the healthy eating, no drinking, no smoking, lots of exercise mantra purely because there isn't any money to cope with the fallout of people not taking care of themselves in years to come. My nurse looked quite upset when i said no, i don't smoke, never have done. although i did get the ' drink less alcohol , lose weight' talk.

BarbaraofSeville · 27/09/2016 10:00

I drink a similar amount to you Butter, maybe slightly more - it's generally nothing Sunday to Thursday apart from once or twice a month where I will have one or two drinks on social occasions in the week and then a bottle of wine on Friday and Saturday night (one bottle in total not per night). DP probably has even les than me - he rarely drinks at home.

So it probably averages at about 12 units a week - the bottle of wine is usually 10/11% cava that says 8.6 units on the bottle. But when I did the latest health app's alcohol quiz, it criticised me for 'binge drinking at the weekend' because I drink nearly all my alcohol in 2 days and I should spread it out more. You can't bloody win.

But like you, many people don't believe that I rarely drink in the week and 'only' drink one bottle of wine at the weekend. It would seem that most of my colleagues share a bottle of wine most nights with their partners, at the every least - sometimes they open a second bottle. One colleague is currently trying to cut down but finding it very hard and she seems to view it as a real achievement if she has 2 alcohol free days in the week.

Thefitfatty · 27/09/2016 10:02

My regular GP is in Canada (I've seen her yearly since I was 9 years old) I'm honest with her about my drinking, which I know is above "recommended units" and probably classifies me as a moderate to heavy drinker in the UK. She doesn't care. She's more concerned with my diet and exercise and making sure that I keep not ever having smoked (which beyond some teenage cigarettes I never have).... Hmm

The GP is see a bit more regularly in the UAE doesn't think my drinking is worth worrying about either.

To be fair, the UK is the only place in the world where I have ever heard people talk about "recommended limits." I don't think the vast majority of Canadians have any idea what the recommended limits are....

BarbaraofSeville · 27/09/2016 10:03

Saying that 3 bottles a week is about average, doesn't make it right or healthy though. The average UK person is overweight and unfit and probably drinks too much. It's just with alcohol, it's not generally visible until it is causing serious health problems.

m0therofdragons · 27/09/2016 10:07

My colleagues have cut down so now they only have 1 bottle a week and feel much better. Turns out they were having a bottle a night. They asked if I wanted to cut down with them but as I rarely drink it seemed pointless. I'll have a few glasses of wine at a social event and the odd thatchers cider but really that's about 2 nights a month. I'm shocked how much others drink.