AIBU to take this first psych appt

[manicinsomniac]

... despite knowing I may well not be able to go on with any more.

I've had mental illnesses since I was 16 but, since I was 23, have only needed medical appts related to them rather than psychological so these have been infrequent and at random times.

This year things have been worse for me and I've been on the waiting list for psychological treatment. I had a few initial assessments but they were at random, sporadic times. I was led to believe (I think) that when I got to the top of the list I would be phoned to see if I could get a suitable time. But I haven't, I've just got a letter with an assigned day and time.

It's not a good time as I'm not really supposed to have time off work but I can ask and it should be fine as a one off. But if it will be this time every week there's no way I can do it. I don't think I could have even a varying day time appt every week and definitely couldn't have the same time every week.

I know I should just phone and ask if there are evening/weekend appts and, if not, just thank them and turn it down. But I feel like if I went to this first one I might have more chance of negotiating/discussing in person?

But is that just selfish and a waste of NHS resources when I know so many people are waiting? I should just let someone who can attend the appointments have it, shouldn't I.

You need to take the appointment. They will then agree with you if you need follow up spots. For example you might be able to make monthly appointments and take it as annual leave.

Thanks, greenfolder - it's supposed to be the first of 12 weekly sessions but maybe they can spread them out. I will ask. I don't get annual leave though (I mean I do, obviously, but at set times, not at times I can pick)

What is your company policy on time off for medical appointments? Is there an occupational health or HR department you could talk to?

I had a very bad MH episode and some days I couldn't go to work because of it. When I got offered my weekly CBT course I had to sell it to my manager that it would help to make me more reliable again and the benefits would outweigh the cost of me having a whole morning off each week (the sessions were in another town) for 12 weeks.

She grudgingly agreed, but I have to say it was the best thing I ever did. I have some dips every now and then, but I would now consider myself recovered completely.

TBH I'd be fighting for this tooth and nail, your MH is far more valuable.

There are plenty of reasons why your employer should accommodate you. Are they aware at all of your health problems?
What would happen for example if someone needed regular physio? By way of comparison?

Policy is a bit woolly really - we can go if pre agreed by employer so it's case by case thing really. Not OH/HR, no, it's not big enough. And I'm not able to be honest about the reason for the apt really, I would have to pretend it's purely physical health (or I feel like I would have to pretend, I don't know if I officially have to). So harder to justify the every week thing.

Thanks, Rhoda - I know it's important but I don't know if it's more important than work, tbh, I'm a single parent so really need my job!

greenfolder - no, they're not very aware. They know of some of the physical effects that are harder to hide but don't know the cause.

physio is a very good point though, I know people have gone for that. I don't know how regular or frequent it was as it wasn't directly affecting me so I didn't notice. But might try to subtly find out.

There's a very true saying that if you don't look after yourself you can't look after anyone else. It can be hard to be open about mental health issues in the workplace.i really do think you need to go and have a chat with the psychologist.

Thanks. I feel better about going to the first one. I thought people would tell me to stop messing the NHS about