To have just spent £135 on a bag?

[FlyHighLittleBee]

I'm always buying cheap handbags (primark) that break within a few months, due to lugging around my laptop and books. My old one has just broke, so went to buy a new one for uni when I fell in love with a moschino bag from ASOS - £135 I couldn't resist. I've never bought an item of clothing/ accessory that costs anywhere near that. I'm not well off by a long stretch of the imagination, but I've got a new job and my wages/ tax credits will pay for my rent, bills and food. The money I get from uni will pay for savings, stuff for DD, days out, Christmas, unexpected outgoings etc. DDs dad pays her nursery fees.

I deserve a treat, I think. I've broken up with her (EA) dad in the past few months, which has been really shit - but took a crazy amount of strength to first do it, and then stick to it. I got one of the top 50 grades out of 20000 students in my first year at uni, so will receive an extra £1000 scholarship this year. I've just managed to become a samaritans volunteers after a gruelling selection process, which will stand me in good stead for my dream career alongside my job in a psychiatric hospital. I don't get many congratulations from family and friends, but I feel really bloody proud of myself at present, especially since I was made homeless at age 16 (6 years ago), and developed severe mental health/ substance abuse issues. It took a good few years to get better.

I don't go out as her dad won't have her at the weekends, so my social life is non existent (but a great way to save money - silver linings ). I cook from scratch to save money (mostly) and try to walk everywhere to save money on public transport.

My DD wants for nothing. Me and her dad spent £200 each last month to buy her a new wardrobe for the colder weather in the next size up, and lots of new toys as she was really bored of her baby ones (she's 16mo now). So why do I feel so bloody guilty?! I keep thinking of other, more important things I could spend the money on, or that I should really save it. Plus I get a little bit of tax credits every month, which I know a lot of people despise on here. Should I really be spending so much on a bag when some people receive no benefits and are struggling to do their shopping every week?

Argh. Should I just cancel my order? I'm feeling so anxious and guilty about it that I don't think it's worth it.

hopefully it's a little bit of incentive, showing you the nice things you can treat yourself too once you've finished studying and achieved your dream job.

Never thought of it that way. I'll look at it in the library from now on when I'm feeling lazy, think of your comment and imagine the bomb handbag collection I'll have when I'm a consultant thank you.

Expect grrrr I meant except

No WAY should you feel guilty! All the achievements you've listed sound incredible - bloody well done! Look forward to the bag with excitement, open it with a glass of prosecco in hand then ENJOY IT. Feel proud every time you look at it. What are you studying OP?

Oh man. I'm crying now thank you everyone so much. My heart's been hurting from the lack of congratulations I've received from my loved ones (massively immature I know - I hope one day I'll stop needing validation.. I'm working on it).

But for now, your messages mean the world to me. I'm so glad I've found Mumsnet. People think I'm the most knowledgable mum in the world when really I just nick all your ideas

Very nice! I like the scarf. Enjoy it OP

If you don't put your own needs and wants first sometimes nobody else will either. Good for you! Very nice bag.

You sound awesome. Enjoy your bag because you deserve this lovely treat!

Oh I love it!! Definitely worth the money, enjoy it!

That is a gorgeous bag. I love bags, I know I'm not supposed too, but I do. I'd have a huge collection if I could.

I'm studying psychology. I want to be a psychologist, which is one of the most desired careers - meaning getting a place on the (fully funded) NHS doctorate course is extremely difficult. 1 in 40 get a place.

I had near on given up on the idea before I had even started uni. I still decided to study the subject as I love it - but I knew I wouldn't stand a chance in becoming a doctor of Psychology, just thought I would get a job in marketing or something with a generic graduate scheme after. I felt like it was much better to study something your passionate about, even if your job doesn't directly relate to it - which was a good shout; it's so much easier to receive a good grade when you read up on your subject for fun

But I bloody love helping people. I couldn't ever be happy in a job where I can't. Ideally, I want to work with kids/ teenagers.

..And then I got to uni, and surprisingly I've absolutely smashed it I truly worry that one day I'll get an email saying they've graded everything wrong and I'm nowhere near achieving a first class degree. But I know that's silly.

I also managed to bag myself a job in a psychiatric hospital, which is notoriously hard to get (in my one anyway). For my doctorate, you need a years experience, and I'll have three, so I'm hoping this will work in my favour.

This, the samaritans, a first class degree and a few scholarships under my belt, will hopefully help me bag a place on the doctorate course. I won't hold my breath, as my uni is very low down on the league tables.

But my grandad always used to tell me - shoot for the moon, and if you miss you'll be amongst the stars

So I'm just going to keep shooting, keep working as hard as I possibly can and hopefully one day I can do my best with helping all the precious little ones who have been dealt a really shit hand in life. Like I was. And we can work together to deal them a better one.

That was to Ellsteeth btw. Looks like I'm just wittering on to myself being cheesy think I'll put down the prosecco

Thrilled you all love the bag btw. I got free next day delivery as well so I'll have it tomorrow fingers crossed it comes before I have to leave for work at 12.30! Otherwise I won't be able to concentrate

You're the cutest thing ever!
Love the bag and am loving you...

FlyHighLittleBee

Sometimes I wish I had more emoticons, I need like one that is of someone standing and giving ypu an ovation. Well done on your accomplishments and a wholly and truly meant good luck woith getting the career you want.

OP you sound AWESOME. I've little doubt you'll achieve your dream some way some how! Good on you!! Your daughter is very lucky to have you!!

£135 on a bag is ok, but £400 on clothes for a 16 month old.. that's bonkers

You don't need to justify it - you totally deserve it! If you were to try and justify it, long term it's going to work out cheaper than buying primarni bags that break after a couple of uses. And to make you feel even better, it's better for the environment buying one good quality item that lasts than lots of crappy ones that need to be thrown away

If you have the money why not. If no one who relies on you financially suffers then spend it on what you want. People spend 4x that on phones.

I love the bag and the scarf. I saw a bag over a weekend for an eye watering amount of money but decided to sell my cheap and bags on eBay to raise funds. I'm at the stage in my life where I'd rather have one excellent quality thing than 10 cheap ones.
Well done for everything you've achieved so far and enjoy the bag :-)

I carry a laptop too and after wasting hundreds on cheap bags, I finally bought myself a good quality Designer bag. 2 years later it's as good as new. The investment is def worth the money if you can afford it and it sounds like you can.

£135 on a bag is ok, but £400 on clothes for a 16 month old.. that's bonkers

And toys. Plus she's a late walker, so shoes - sandals, trainers, shoes for best, wellies, boots. A decent coat, a new swimming costume, tops, jumpers, cardigans, trousers, dresses, socks. Stacking toys, a few irritating noisy ones, a dolly and pram and trike. Some bath toys. 2 sleeping bags. Coverall bibs. A big stock up of nappies.She needs a bit more than usual so we can split the essentials between 2 houses as her dickhead dad thinks it's funny to not return things so I need to panic and rush out and buy more. But because he paid some money towards them I have to accept this

Is this mad? I'll get her some more toys for Christmas but I won't have to buy her anything else although I will because I want to, I don't need to until about march.

How about "No". Don't you dare cancel that bag, because you have deserve it. You are working hard at life. Treat yourself.

If it includes toys and clothes split between two houses, it's not so bad.. I thought you meant £400 just on autumn clothes for her. If you can afford it, do it, but if you're feeling the pinch ebay is your friend!

that really is not a lot to spend on a bag tbh

30 years ago, young, single working in London, I spent £300 on a Mui Mui bag. I have no idea why - I was never that extravagant with clothes and accessories. For the past 15 years with mortgage and two very expensive children I have been lucky to buy one for £30 from Next. When my last cheap bag broke I came across my old £300 one and it is like new and so blooming beautiful - I wonder why I stopped using it.!
Enjoy your bag and use it, it does sound ridiculous but you will smile every time you sling it over your shoulder.