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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to insist my kids wear helmets?

170 replies

Beastlyboysblog · 18/09/2016 18:01

It has been recently suggested that I am perhaps a little anal with the safety of my children's heads by insisting that they wear a crash helmet when they are on their scooters. I see other kids day in day out on the school run without them & I guess that's up to their parents but in my mind the scooters are no different to bikes and they can just as easily fall off them and crack their heads. I personally don't want to see my kids' brains all over the road if there's an accident. Is that really anal and AIBU?

OP posts:
kansasmum · 19/09/2016 15:58

I make my ds wear one scooting. He actually came off his scooter at a fair speed and hit his helmet covered head on the kerb. He hit it hard enough to crack the helmet- imagine if that had been his head. It actually really scared him so he always wears one now.

Goingtobeawesome · 19/09/2016 17:34

If they are running and trip there is nothing in the way of their hands breaking the fall..

Goingtobeawesome · 19/09/2016 17:39

NavyandWhite - given how many times I've seen kids wearing helmets in a way rendering them totally useless in an accident, I don't think it was patronising of casual to spell out how to fit them. That single post could save a life.

BikeRunSki · 19/09/2016 17:41

No helmet, no wheels here. Scooter, bike or balance bike. DD is particular can get a fair speed going on her scooter.

EmmaFairthorne · 19/09/2016 18:20

My younger 4 have ALWAYS worn helmets, no matter what. When my eldest (19) fell off a skateboard a few minutes from home a month ago, without a helmet, I wasn't expecting the outcome. Paramedics said it may be concussion, 24 hours at the hospital, then home. Then they called me in to the 'family room'... 2 bleeds on the brain, put in an enforced coma, intubated and blue lighted to Cardiff (a good 100 miles away) for brain surgery.

I hadn't even thought of buying her a helmet, she was always so very sensible. Now I will not let any of them leave the house without a well adjusted helmet, checked and strapped for bikes, scooters and skateboards! Even heelies (which none of them own thank the Gods!). I'm not trying to scare anyone, but life is precious, and it's not until you see your baby in intensive care that you realise. I will always feel guilty for buying her a longboard for her 14th birthday, but not a helmet to match...

AIBU to insist my kids wear helmets?
EmmaFairthorne · 19/09/2016 18:22

This is Georgia 3 weeks after brain surgery. She shaved the rest of her hair off so she didn't have half a head of hair! She says: 'My new hair is growing on me, pun intended!' xx

GertrudeBelle · 19/09/2016 18:28

Completely agree with the "no helmet, no wheels" policy. And Emma, how beautiful if your daughter! Hope she's ok.

But all that said, "We wet hair and apply shampoo at the sink, then it's helmets on and into the shower to rinse off. A decent helmet has enough ventilation slots to let plenty of water through" has to be one of the craziest things I've ever heard. Do you do that too FullTime? Genuinely curious.

EmmaFairthorne · 19/09/2016 18:34

Thank you! Yes, she is ok, we have a two year window of possible new symptoms cropping up until the brain scar tissue is healed. Fingers crossed for the rest of the recovery to go well. We are VERY lucky to have her here. Docs said to prepare for the worst. As far as I'm concerned, the NHS work miracles. She will always have a scar (57 staples, from the centre of her forehead all the way around to in front of her ear), but she is with us. That's the most important thing.

WhatamessIgotinto · 19/09/2016 18:39

YANBU. At all. Round here it seems to be when the kids get to about 11/12 they seem to stop wearing helmets on their bikes. DS is 13 and on his bike A LOT. He insists on wearing a helmet since seeing his cousin in intensive care after falling and hitting his head on the edge of the kerb. Now only has the use of one hand. It is totally not worth it.

somekindofmother · 19/09/2016 18:43

yanbu, ds went down a hill on his scooter, lost control, hit a wall and went upside down, over the handlebars, over the wall and onto a pavement head first... wearing a helmet... got up and got straight back on the scooter, relatively unfazed... not sure that'd be the same without the helmet.

BikeRunSki · 19/09/2016 19:46

I am involved a lit in kids cycle coaching and racing. At the start of every coaching session we do a bike safety check and a helmet check. No one is allowed to ride (or race) without a properly fitted helmet, even if it's just a skills session on an AstroTurf court.

shabbs · 19/09/2016 22:18

Emma - your daughter looks a beautiful girl - read your post faster and faster - in a kind of panic mode!!! Sending my best wishes to her and all the family for repeated improvement and total full recovery.

There is nothing like standing in A & E, or a ward or, sadly in our case, in a mortuary looking at your child (no matter what age) and willing them to recover, to open their eyes, to be who they were a short time before the accident.

EmmaFairthorne · 20/09/2016 08:32

Oh no... :( That is so sad. And what I had prepared for. Bless you, big hugs to you. xxx

changedMyUsernameToPostThis · 20/09/2016 09:42

To add to the discussion about helmets (and changed name to post this as it would be quite revealing!) I was involved some years ago in a company which was the first ever to test helmets after an accident...

Helmet safety standards are roughly speaking the same for anything from ski to cycling to riding etc. The test involves putting a head form (metal lump of a certain weight) in the helmet and then dropping the helmet from a preset distance. The head form has a sensor inside and it measures the shock to the head form through the helmet...

The test requires one drop and the sensor must measure below a certain value (drop is from a number of feet up in the air (representing a person of e.g. 6 foot falling over)

we were the first ever company (and possibly still the only company) to do formalised testing on what level of impact in the first accident would mean that the helmet would no longer perform to standard in a second accident - i.e. what level of accident is needed to make the helmet useless afterwards...

the results were quite frankly shocking - if you are a rider who comes into the yard and takes off your helmet and drops it on the yard floor - throw it out / if you knock a bike helmet off a kitchen table onto a hard floor - throw it out / if your child is wearing a helmet on a scooter or bike and falls off - throw it out (helmet not child Grin) - I would have to dig out the results to give precise figures, but basically any shock above a drop onto a carpet or equivalent could very easily damage the helmet enough to stop it working again in the future...

The way helmets work is simple - significant damage to the human is not from the impact or abrasion to the skull - it is in the skull stopping movement suddenly (i.e. impact with the ground) and the brain continuing to move - hitting itself against the skull on the inside - think of it as whiplash to the brain... a helmet works by using compressible polystyrene, in an impact this squashes, absorbing some of the impact, but critically it acts like a pillow in slowing down the de-acceleration, so rather than the skull coming to an abrupt stop and the brain hitting it inside, the skull continues to move at a slowing pace by compressing the skull into the polystyrene and slowing it all down - that is how it works...

The issue is that once compressed, the polystyrene will not work the same way in the future, it can crack, it can compress, it can dent - and all of it is usually hidden under the shell of the helmet, so the wearer doesn't know... This is why motorcyclists tend to really take care of their helmets - it is life or death for them... but children don't and while I don't want to overly worry people children who take the helmets off once having cycled to the playground / school / etc. and they get knocked onto the ground - well those helmets may be useless...

having said all that - any helmet which meets the relevant safety standard will have gone through the same testing - beyond that the price difference is all about style and brand and offers no extra safety... so any damage or accident, please replace the helmets...

drspouse · 20/09/2016 09:47

If FullTimeYummy can tell us how old her children are and roughly what area of the country she lives in, we can see if any MNers can spot her children on the swings with helmets on. As they will be the only ones.

Then we can assess whether she genuinely makes them shower with helmets on (does she shower with a helmet on herself? does she realise that adult brains are much slower to heal than child brains so she is much more at risk herself? and also from running/walking down stairs?)

Rinoachicken · 20/09/2016 10:08

Both mine wear helmets when scooting or cycling. Non-negotiable.

I also see so many kids wearing helmets hat are hanging off, too far back on their head or otherwise really badly fitted.

This morning though, saw a mother and her daughter cycling to school. /"saw them yesterday and just like yesterday the mother had to scream at her daughter to stop at the roundabout and spend 5mins talking about stopping at the line etc.

I thought to myself that it really doesn't matter where she stops - when she gets knocked off or falls of it WILL be serious - because neither were wearing a helmet.

I just couldn't get my head around the mum clearly trying to teach her daughter the rules of the road, how to cycle safely, but neither were wearing a helmet

FullTimeYummy · 20/09/2016 10:20

LOLZ at drspouse feeling the need to try and "out" me Grin

AlphaBites · 20/09/2016 10:22

We have horses and dc know the firm rules of "No hat and Body Protector = No Ride" same rules apply for the bikes (minus the body protector!), scooting I'm a bit more relaxed on as they aren't used much and when they are it's at a leisurely pace.

Squeegle · 20/09/2016 10:33

fulltime, for the avoidance of doubt - was your first post a joke or not??

FurryDogMother · 20/09/2016 10:45

AlphaBoites - that's interesting - why do we wear body protectors when riding horses and not when cycling?

Ifailed · 20/09/2016 10:48

changedMyUsernameToPostThis
I am aware of this, did mention it up thread. Problem is small kids (and adults) do mishandle them, and even at the cheapest it would become exorbitant to replacement every time they were dropped etc.
At the end of the day, it's about risk and I think the best thing parents can do for children is to teach them about safe riding, to constantly watch out for other road/pavement users, to always be in control of their bike/scooter and, obviously, never have a shower without full body armour.

acasualobserver · 20/09/2016 11:17

I just couldn't get my head around the mum clearly trying to teach her daughter the rules of the road, how to cycle safely, but neither were wearing a helmet

Wearing a (properly fitting) helmet is no substitute for knowing the rules of the road and being well trained in riding safely. As I said upthread, a helmet is not a magic hat.

BikeRunSki · 20/09/2016 12:51

A bike is unlikely to trample over you or kick you if you fall off and it's frightened.

Radiatorvalves · 20/09/2016 14:53

We are all bike (and ski) helmet wearers. Both I and DS1 (12) have benefitted in the last couple of years - been knocked off by drivers, and been ok, if bruised. Not sure that would have been the case without helmets.

The children absolutely get it, and have never questioned the need to wear helmets.

I didn't insist with scooters - it was some time ago, and I guess it depends on the child. I see both round here (London).

My sympathy to Shabbs and also best wishes to Emma's daughter.

Frenchfarmwench · 20/09/2016 16:08

You don't have to be going fast to have a nasty crash. When I was about 7 I was on my scooter and veered off course onto a drain. The wheel stuck in the hole between the grates and the scooter flipped up, somersaulting me over the handlebars. Lost 3 teeth and had to have stitches. I am 50 now, so this was a long time ago and helmets were not really around back then, but my goodness I made sure my daughters wore them even on a scooter.

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