I WILL leave him one day.

[QueenEagle]

I pointed out to dh last week how rudeI thought it was when he reached across ds2's face to get the salt pot at the table in a restaurant without saying either excuse me or could you pass it?

I also said I thought it rude when the waitress brought the starters and dh turned his nose up and said ugh I don't like the look of that.

Lots more examples like this occur all the time. I think dh is rude and ignorant. He wouldn't stand for it from the kids and would berate tham if they did anything like.

He gets angry when I point anything out but I cannot just keep quiet and say nothing especially as he has a go at the kids for similar things. I am growing to resent him more and more.

So, AIBU to point things like this out?

His behaviour isn't ideal.

But telling him off for these sorts of (relatively trivial, tbh) things, particularly in front of the kids, isn't exactly polite either, I'm afraid.

You have 3 options if this is a particularly important thing for you.

a) ignore it and try and come to terms with the fact that this is him

b) tell him everytime he does something like this, the same way that he would tell the kids

c) start doing the same to him.

If you think that something like this is Really That Important, then no, you arent.

Agree with last post - I understand why you want to raise the points wih him as far as setting a good example to the children is concerned, but if it was me I would rather it be pointed out to me quietly later on and not infront of other people or the children which would just make me feel embarrassed and get defensive.

Just to make it clear I did mention it when we were on our own together as I hate creating an atmosphere at the time.

These things may sound trivial but in my book you should treat others as you would expect to be treated yourslef.

As he always picks the kids up I don't think it unreasonable for me to want him to set a good example with his own behaviour. Unfortuantely he is the type of person who always moans about things, he is an eternal pessimist, very negative in his appraoch to life and it is now starting to pee me off tbh.

think your in the same place as me hun, its not really what my hubby does thats the problem anymore, its the fact that everything he does pees me off these days lol. but as regards your original question, no your not being unreasonable, infact its a bit of a bone of contention with me and my other half aswell, so i know how you feel hun. good luck getting the msg accross.

Hmm,I sense you are really going off your dh QE.

DH does this (on and off) He can be incredibly rude but can't believe it when people are rude to him or in his presence.
It's called double standards and p's me off. I ignore him most of the time because if I point out the fact that he has been rude, he gets defensive.
When he complains about others to me, I tell him that none of us are perfect all of the time are we ?

Goodness me, I thought QE was back - but thread is from 2007.

Really?! How on earth did It appear on the list of AIBU???!!
I haven't dug it up on Google search! Or looked it up in archives !
It was there! Is MN playing with my mind?

And I didn't notice the date.
Weird

Aha. I pressed last tab at bottom of AIBU page.

Wouldn't it be nice if the OP returned to update the story.