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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who is unreasonable here - the staff or the potential customers?

141 replies

blankpieceofpaper · 10/09/2016 23:55

A reasonably busy tourist city today at lunchtime: we enter one of those vintage style tea and cake/ lunch tea rooms about midway through the lunch peak time. We meet the staff just after entering and its established that we do want lunch - not just drinks and begin to make their way to a table. It's in the next 'room' of the cafe and we are tersely are told its a table for four. Bit of confusion here over us thinking that means its reserved and we then make their back into main part of cafe there is a raised section with four out of five tables free so we begin to head there - it is quieter and there are window seats. We are stopped again - no, those are tables for four/ five (maybe ... if two people squashed on benches!). There is a table for two but it is currently dirty and full of plates, she will clear it for us. This table is squashed right by the serving hatch in the busier area. I've experienced this before and would prefer not to... but no, same blunt tone - this is the only table we can have.

Anyway, long and the short of it is, we leave a cafe about a third full and find a great one a few streets over. Happy ending all round - they kept their table rules and we were eventually fed.

I was just a bit amazed! They have great reviews on tripadvisor, but I spoke to a friend who went in there as a single person and was asked to move tables. Does this happen anywhere else?!

OP posts:
somekindofmother · 11/09/2016 09:57

why did you think the table you were initially shown to was reserved?

seems like they were happy to let you have the bigger table in the back room or the smaller table in the main room. that seems like a fair choice tbh.

however whilst it seems reasonable I am an absolute stickler for service and if the service is 'off' from the get go I would rather leave and go elsewhere. it's usually quite telling of how the overall experience will be.

Original poster
blankpieceofpaper · 11/09/2016 10:05

Trifle That is a lot of things I am supposed to have done! Ok:

Yes, we were told it would be a 10 minute wait.

It wasn't the 'back room' (where have I said that?) the cafe was in three sections in a long narrow design where rooms have been knocked through to make one complete open-plan space - there is a large door frame.

We went to this table first simply because from the angle as we walked in it was one we saw that was free and the cafe wasn't one of those ones where you wait to be seated. And, as I have said several times, several tables were free. We weren't 'led' there. (have you read what I have said properly?!)

This first table was is nearish a window, if that helps you. The staff member says no, that for four in such a way that it sounded as if it had been reserved. We did not "decide it was reserved," we just misunderstood/ slight confusion then think ok, not a problem and go in search of another table. Again, just to be clear, it is not a place where you are seated.

We go into the other section of the cafe. The third that, like the area we just left, is mainly empty - one table of customers. No - the only table we can have is the one that is dirty that we have to stand and wait ten minutes for - we are told this, just to be clear. And it was the location btw, not the size! As I have stated, they were all about the same size anyway! So we thank them, politely decline and leave.

No pram or drama. I won't bad mouth them to anyone - I will praise the other cafe instead who were really good with their menu and served an excellent G and T!

The

OP posts:
Arkhamasylum · 11/09/2016 10:09

YANBU.

I used to go a nice cafe near to where I live. I'd say they had around twenty tables. Most of these were tables for four. There were, I think, three tables for two, all squashed together, so you were almost sitting beside the people next to you. I went in once and I think maybe two other tables were taken, including one for two. The server showed us to a seat next to them. We asked if we could sit at another table (most of which were tables for four and empty) and it was made clear that this was a problem. Eventually, they let us sit at a table for four. We had a quick coffee, so as not to cause a bigger fuss, then left. Haven't been back, wouldn't go back. We were made to feel like crap, just in case fourteen parties of four walked in in the next twenty minutes. I think if a cafe wants to maximise its revenue, that fine, but it's bad practice to let the customers know that they're considered 'revenue'.

Trifleorbust · 11/09/2016 10:17

Fair enough, with a choice between a ten minute wait for a table I didn't want I would do the same as you. But I still don't think they were unreasonable to choose to hold their best table for a larger group.

YouTheCat · 11/09/2016 10:20

But there were several 4 seat tables free, trifle. Are you reading a different thread to everyone else? Hmm

limitedperiodonly · 11/09/2016 10:22

I showed a '2' to a table for '2' tonight and they didn't look happy so I gave them a bigger table (that wasn't reserved) I always think please the current customer as the next one might not even come!

I'd eat at your place RedSoloCup. I also don't mind being asked to share. Obviously not for a romantic dinner, but I've had some really good times squeezed in with people I didn't know before I sat down.

limitedperiodonly · 11/09/2016 10:30

It's not spitting out your dummy to not want to sit by the serving hatch or the toilets or a back room that looks boring and where the staff might forget you. You do what the OP did and ask for a better table and go somewhere else if there isn't one.

One of my favourite places has squeezed a table for two under the spiral staircase leading from the upstairs front door. I don't want to sit there either because when it's raining you get dripped on.

Original poster
blankpieceofpaper · 11/09/2016 10:35

Trifle you asked me if I'd been told to wait 10 minutes then answered 'no' for me immediately. She told us. Where else would I have got the information from?

And I have no idea what this 'best table' is! The first table we walked towards was the same as any other table - nearish a window, which wasn't even that relevant, it just happened to be the first one we saw and one that was free. As were several others!

There's no point in answering people who don't read the thread properly or just invent details of their own.

Anyway arkham that sounds awful and I'm not surprised you haven't been back. All those tables that will be filled rapidly! I am not a table hogger who will linger hours on a table for four with one cup of coffee. It's nice to be made to feel welcome.

OP posts:
Bountybarsyuk · 11/09/2016 10:35

Why is it unreasonable to want a window seat or a seat with a nice view? Part of what I'm paying for when I go somewhere is the experience, and so being squashed on a very small table in a not nice part of the cafe wouldn't deliver that. If it's an especially busy time, then I would take what I could get, but if it isn't, I will definitely ask for the table I'd like to sit at and spent £40 or whatever. If they'd prefer to hold out for the imaginary 5 lots of 4 people that may then arrive, that's fine by me.

Most places want you to be happy and want you to sit where you like, I do it all the time when places aren't busy, only on MN would it be suggested you should sit somewhere shit to appear not greedy by having a nicer table!

gastropod · 11/09/2016 10:45

YANBU. It's your money and your choice. When you pay to go out to eat, you are not being unreasonable to want to enjoy that experience. I'd have gone somewhere else too.

maddiemookins16mum · 11/09/2016 10:50

YANBU, tables for two these days are usually badly positioned and cramped.

limitedperiodonly · 11/09/2016 10:56

only on MN would it be suggested you should sit somewhere shit to appear not greedy by having a nicer table!

Or pointing out that tipping generously as a repeat customer gets you better service. It may not be fair, but it does, mostly. On the occasions when it hasn't, I didn't return and bestowed my largesse somewhere else.

Nanny0gg · 11/09/2016 11:00

It's not spitting out your dummy to not want to sit by the serving hatch or the toilets or a back room that looks boring and where the staff might forget you. You do what the OP did and ask for a better table and go somewhere else if there isn't one.

^^This. You are paying for the ambience as well as the food so sitting by the serving hatch if there are plenty of empty tables is unnecessary.

Proprietors should deal with the customer in front of them not potential ones that may never come.

It was lunchtime on a busy Saturday in a touristy area and they had a number of free tables. That says a lot.

Trifleorbust · 11/09/2016 11:20

YoutheCat: It doesn't matter how many 4 person tables there were. The staff reserve those for groups of more than 2. That is at the discretion of the owner.

Trifleorbust · 11/09/2016 11:22

I think when you go out to eat, it is absolutely your money and your choice. But the establishment you want to eat at isn't obliged to seat you - they can turn your custom away because what you want (a big table for a small group) doesn't work for them. It's a transaction. That's how transactions work.

Trifleorbust · 11/09/2016 11:23

OP, excuse me if I didn't read the thread in enough detail. I still think this is what happened: you wanted to eat somewhere, you were offered a table, you didn't want it, you went elsewhere. No-one was being unreasonable not to offer you a table that they could make more money from with a different group of customers.

Original poster
blankpieceofpaper · 11/09/2016 11:33

Trifle it was the tone of your reply that I found objectionable - and it was fairly basic stuff you had missed or mistaken. The accusatory tone and hyperbole was unnecessary, and the assumptions were erroneous.

As someone else said early upthread, if that truly is their policy then fine - but it should probably be managed with a seating policy/ notice/ greeted as you enter or whatever.

And as I said in my first post - everyone won. They got their table policy, and we got lunch elsewhere. It had not been something I had come across so specifically before. NannyOgg etc that's fair enough, you're paying for more than the food in that sense.

Enough said - I am off to have lunch. On my sofa that seats three, that I have made myself!

OP posts:
Trifleorbust · 11/09/2016 11:37

Excuse my tone. I think it was because I found your OP quite entitled. And frankly, I still do. Why should they put up a notice? It's fairly obvious isn't it - two people, two seats. If it a lunch time service in a tourist area, they know they could get busy quickly and you don't really know their patterns of footfall as well as they do, so you can't really say they weren't expecting a rush.

YouTheCat · 11/09/2016 11:51

I don't see what's so entitled about wanting to be able to sit at a table of your choice (within reason - obviously sitting at a table for 6 when there is just 2 and other tables available would be a bit off).

Why are 2 customers, who are going to be buying lunch as well as drinks, less important than 4 customers that aren't even in the restaurant?

The table for 2 wasn't even clean anyway.

Trifle, you're just nitpicking for no apparent reason.

roundaboutthetown · 11/09/2016 12:02

Well, you'd have to be a rather entitled sort of a cafe that assumes it doesn't need the custom of single people and couples to have told the OP & co that they had to wait ten minutes for what was clearly the shittiest table in the place where no-one would choose to sit. It's not remotely entitled to say no thank you to a cafe with such dire customer service - why would anyone bother paying for that?

MissDuke · 11/09/2016 12:05

OP yanbu at all. I despise poor service and would not have sat on there feeling hard done by - having to wait 10 mins for a poky table - while other groups came in after me and get seated and their orders taken. Glad you found somewhere better!

roundaboutthetown · 11/09/2016 12:06

And they don't even clear their tables quickly enough when they aren't even busy - sounds crap...

OlennasWimple · 11/09/2016 12:11

DH hates making a fuss in restaurants, but I've had too many meals out ruined by sitting in a draft / sitting at a cramped table / being next to the loos / being in the blind spot where no one can see if you need something to put up with that unless it's completely necessary, so now if I don't like a table when we are being seated I will ask (politely!) if we can move to another table straightaway. 99% of the time they are happy to oblige

dustarr73 · 11/09/2016 12:23

Often times as well those table for two are tiny.Not enough room for your plates.

It says a lot about the place if it was nearly empty on a Saturday.

Lweji · 11/09/2016 12:25

It's stupid for a restaurant/cafe/whatever to send away two existing customers for the possibility of four customers.

YANBU

I can see Triffle quickly going bankrupt as a restaurant owner. Grin

Any restaurant/cafe/whatever I've been on will seat two people in whatever tables they have. If they only have four seaters left, they will take the two people to those. No hassle.
The only exceptions are when there is a queue of people waiting, but still, I wouldn't expect a larger group to get ahead of a smaller group unless the waiting time would be short.