This will probably out me but I'm so annoyed. My DM hasn't seen my DNs for several months, despite them only living half hour away. My DB has over the years backed off from seeing any of us unless it's on their terms or for their children's birthdays when we're all expected to jump to it. All attempts at visiting and/or invitations for meals are either refused or accepted but then cancelled at last minute. At the same time sil bemoans facts that her kids miss their cousins. In summer holidays I tried to arrange to meet up but that came to nothing. Fast forward to last week when my DM arranged to visit them on Monday evening, this was cancelled on the day. My sil said she would visit my mum on the Tuesday but cancelled on the day. Neither could do the Wednesday so Thurs evening was agreed upon. My DM went up to their house, my DN let her in, put the kettle on, chatted away while his siblings were in other room on computer. When my DM asked where their mum was she was told "her and my dad have gone out for the night" ! My mum didn't make any fuss and stayed for about an hour with children (eldest is mid teens so was in charge of other two) and then went home.
My mother is always quite docile about these things but I am furious! How rude, how ignorant. I am tempted to send an angry text to them both, although I know it won't do any good. But I certainly won't be keeping in touch anymore. Just needed to rant 
AIBU?
To be furious with my brother and sister-in-law
worldsworstchildren · 08/09/2016 10:08
World Whatever you decide I would not send a text in anger - been there done that 
-it may have worse repurcussions.
How does your mum feel about it.
What I have learnt is that you can't make people hold rhe same standards as yourself nor can you make them apologise (frustrating though that is).
Your brother may have his own longstanding reasons for feeling inferior or something similar or he may be totally self-absorbed /entitled. At least your DNs are not prevented from seeing your DM n their own home so I would encourage contact with them directly and then later some enquiry as to whether your DB has been offended in some way because you would love to see more of them.
Little Beauty here's an idea. When you have perfectly valid reasons for not wanting to see someone, don't ask them round to visit. Simple yet perfect. 
Thank you all for your comments, they have cooled my rage 
I wouldn't be surprised if dsil was on MN so may hear from them yet.
M
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