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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be proud or not that my DC are entering another school year

20 replies

onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad · 07/09/2016 18:31

Should i be proud? I don't feel it.
All being well most children will enter yrs 1,2,3,4 and so on.
There's been a stream of photos on Fb lately of lovely children in their new smart sparkling school uniform with captions such as: 'So proud (my child) is entering yr (whatever)'
Should I be proud my DS is about to go into yr 11 and my other DS is going into yr 13.
I don't feel proud, I feel relieved that we all got through another year and another summer was diverted without too much disaster.
I'm glad for my DC that they are either doing what they want to and/ or that they are being educated - but should I be 'proud' of something they haven't achieved in their own right but rather something they have to do.
I don't get why parents are posting pictures of their DC on FB saying 'I'm proud that my DC is/are entering year (whatever)' ?
Is this a serious mother fail... am I clearly missing something?

OP posts:
J0kersSmile · 07/09/2016 18:34

You only missed that it was national photos of dc in uniform stood in front of a door/fireplace. Grin

EnglishGirlApproximately · 07/09/2016 18:35

I've felt a bit like that this week tbh. Ds has started reception and I feel like I'm the only one not weeping at the thought. I'm excited for him but don't find myself heartbroken that my baby's growing up or anything like that - I see him staring school as a good, exciting thing.

I'm also missing something I guess.

Balletgirlmum · 07/09/2016 18:36

I was proud when both of my children entered year 7 of their schools - of the yiung person they were & also their schools are selective (one academically one vocationally). But now I just feel relief they got through to another year & in ds's case nervous about what is to come as he has a lot of difficulties at school.

Lilaclily · 07/09/2016 18:37

Weeeeell

I guess parents are proud of the children their babies are growing up to be ?
I'm proud my dd skipped into yr 5 yesterday without a backward glance , I'm proud she's growing into a confident young person

FATEdestiny · 07/09/2016 18:38

Is it ok to post first day pictures as long as you don't say you're proud?

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 07/09/2016 18:39

Yabu.

It's exciting. I think you're being miserly.

AnnaMarlowe · 07/09/2016 18:39

Of for goodness sake - you are over thinking this!

People just take an opportunity to share a nice picture of their kids to wider friends and family. Moving up a year in school is a big deal for most children and exciting.

If you don't choose to post a picture that's fine.

MumsFlouncingOnASummerHoliday · 07/09/2016 18:40

So glad its not just me. I have a relatively small selection of people i've friended on facebook yet pages of posed DC in various uniforms. It left me wondering if I should have felt more than relief and documented this great acomplishment at geting them each to their schools on time, in one piece, after six weeks of laidbackness.

pictish · 07/09/2016 18:43

You know fine it's just an expression of love and general pride in their children growing up and flourishing.
Yabu to pretend you don't get it for sneering purposes.

WaitroseCoffeeCostaCup · 07/09/2016 18:44

Very sneery indeed.

CwtchMeQuick · 07/09/2016 18:45

DS started reception yesterday. I'm proud that he went into school happily without a backwards glance, that he played nicely with the other children, that he's so keen to learn. I'm also proud of myself for raising him to be such a well rounded little boy, something that everyone told me I'd fail at when I became pregnant. I'm not proud of his first day, but I'm proud of all the connotations that come with that and I'm proud of what it means to us.

bigbluebus · 07/09/2016 18:49

My Fakebook newsfeed has been full of these pictures too - and my DCs are now adults. I get why someone might post a first day at school picture or first day at Secondary school photo but I don't get what is so special about moving up to Yr 3, 8 etc. If you want to post a photo of your child in their new school uniform, then post it and just put 'Lily/Oliver looking smart on 1st day back at school. No need for the 'feeling proud' bit - as you say OP the child is just doing what they have to do in the natural progression of the education system.

Interesting that yesterday my local radio station was debating the rights and wrongs of posting such pictures of your children on Facebook as they will be there for posterity and someone searching in years to come may be able to find such pictures which the child (as an adult) may not want people to have access to.

bumsexatthebingo · 07/09/2016 18:50

Well I agree with you op. I think I put a photo of my kids on their first day in reception. The whole photo at the first day of every year is just odd imo. And the timehop ones with the previous years photo next to them that looks exactly identical!

AnotherDayInParadiseLost · 07/09/2016 18:54

I don't say I'm proud but I know my friends who live a long way away love to see the annual door picture and I love to see theirs.
It's a fun record of how they change over the years. Unless of course you don't believe you should ever post pictures of your children on any social media. I'm not in that camp so it's fun :).

onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad · 07/09/2016 18:59

It's not that I don't believe you should post pics of your kids in school uniform (not that I do) but it's the 'feeling proud' that I just don't quite get. What is there to be proud of?
Hundreds of kids all over the country are returning to school - it's something they have to do / not sure what there is to feel proud about?
Maybe I am just miserly as some one said.

OP posts:
Whatthefoxgoingon · 07/09/2016 19:00

I don't think my parents ever took photos of me at the start of the school year come to think of it....

pictish · 07/09/2016 19:00

Yes maybe so.

user1473106504 · 07/09/2016 19:00

you can feel proud of what you like :-)

TheSecondOfHerName · 07/09/2016 19:09

I'm proud of DS1 for starting Y12 because he worked his arse off to get the required grades for the courses he wanted to do (provisional offer of ABBBBB) and catch up on missed work after two years of illness.

Didn't post a photo of him in his new suit, although I was tempted. Smile

Mummaaaaaah · 07/09/2016 19:13

I read somewhere that you really shouldn't post pics of DCs in their uniform for safety reasons. Elton John did so yesterday and now anyone knows where he sends his DC to school!!

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