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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find it almost devastating when something goes wrong with the car

24 replies

NapQueen · 06/09/2016 23:56

I don't know why, but The Car always gets to me. This particular one has been grand all the them we have had it but in the week or so leading up to the MOT I always feel a nervous dread.

Whenever I need to sort tax or renew insurance etc I always feel like it weighs on me. I hate filling it with petrol.

I love love love to drive though.

It's currently doing a sort of clunking noise under me every now and again, usually when I go from 3rd to 4th or the car has to make an effort (a turn on a steep hill etc). Google informs me that it's probably the transmission and as it's due a service I'm sure that will be checked then.

Aibu as I know tomorrow I can call and book it in. But it still fills me with angst. What if it's funked? What if it's major money to fix?

I just hate how bothered I get about it all and honestly have no generic life woes so really need to get a fucking grip. But I know tonight now I'm going to be tossing and turning bothered by the fact that (in my dramatic head) this whole thing is either going to result in my going bankrupt or the car falling apart on me on the motorway.

Neither of which are actually likely to happen.

OP posts:
TiggeryBear · 07/09/2016 00:11

You are not alone! I have given myself horrific migraine like headaches whilst waiting for my car to pass it's MOT! I know that it's fine & likely to pass as we've checked everything that we reasonably can but it still fills me with dread. It's definitely not helped that I live in a rather rural area, (extremely infrequent buses that don't go where you need to for work!) & not having a car makes things that much more difficult. The worst occasion was my car was in the garage for a service, booked a days annual leave, & the garage's ramp broke with my car stuck in the air! No option to work from home so had to take two extra days unpaid as had no car & their courtesy car was unavailable. I hate having to deal with the car, but I love driving it!

JessicasCrocodile · 07/09/2016 00:39

I am the same! Last time I broke down I actually cried and called my mum. Not sure what she was supposed to do, she was 120miles away and I had aa cover. And I was 28 ffs!

LikeDylanInTheMovies · 07/09/2016 00:41

I get incredibly fatalistic come MoT time. This despite the fact that despite its advancing years (20 and still going strong) it has flown through the MoT without even an advisory. I'm convinced that this year my luck will run out and start browsing autotrader to see what's available for under a grand whilst it is booked in.

NapQueen · 07/09/2016 07:20

Oh god I'm not alone. Thank God!

OP posts:
HKHKHR · 07/09/2016 09:56

Me too! No idea what it's all about. My family take the piss out of me about it.

EveOnline2016 · 07/09/2016 09:58

Me to as financial we just break even, and dh needs his car for work.

WhatWouldCoachBombayDo · 07/09/2016 10:06

I'm the same, our car is a money pit at the moment due to a problem were trying to resolve with a dpf filter. I get nervous to turn the fucking thing on, I'm so worried the engine light will come on Sad

ARumWithAView · 07/09/2016 10:18

Yes, same here. Also, I feel inexplicably mortified when they call to say it's failed the MOT. I react like they're telling me I failed my driving test: get all clipped and brisk and say fine, fine, it's not a surprise, that's exactly what I expected, FINE. Then get off the phone and burst into tears.

But it was worse in California -- there's no MOT there, and you can just drive your old banger until it gives up, preferably in the middle of a 16-lane freeway during rush hour. I used to get terrible hand-cramps driving our ancient car home, since I knew that gripping the steering wheel really really tight would stop the entire car falling apart. What's that clunking noise? Aargh! Turn up the radio.

cestlavielife · 07/09/2016 10:24

Try some mindfulness. .. anxiety is not good for you...
Get a new cheap car eg dacía basic model 5995 on a lease purchase scheme then you know exactly what your costs are for the year....

LonestarStateOfMind · 07/09/2016 10:27

I'm the same! I think it's because problems = £££s which I just don't have. Also I am afraid of garages, a couple of years ago I left my car in to get something simple done, new break pads and the mechanic failed to screw a vital part back on, which caused me to have a near miss.

LikeDylanInTheMovies · 07/09/2016 10:35

Mindfulness or 'sitting down and stopping mithering for five minutes'. All the time in the world inside a dream yurt won't alter the fact that a disastrous MoT would leave me having to find money that would take a massive dent out of my finances to replace or fix the car

The problem being with the Dacia idea is that like most people who drive elderly cars, it isn't for shits and giggles, it is because I can't afford anything else.

whatishistory · 07/09/2016 10:37

Growing up in the middle of no where and with my Dad unable to work due to ill health, I was always on edge about our car breaking down. They were always old/cheap so this happened with some regularity. There was no public transport and no shops within walking distance (no online food shopping, in the '80s). We were reliant upon neighbour's giving my mum a lift in order to be able to eat. I remember having to miss out on events/going to see friends because of the car breaking down. I hated being so reliant upon a car and felt trapped. I chose to go to Newcastle uni because of being in a big city with public transport and everything being easibly accessible.

That worry has stayed with me. We (I think wrongly) moved to the edge of our current city when we had DC. Although it's only 2 miles to a lovely fishing village with shops and 5 miles into the city, the public transport is poor. We made stupid decision number 2 when we put the DDs into an out of catchment school that is not within a reasonable walking distance. At the time, we had a car each. But a year ago my DH was made redundant and is a SAHP so we can only afford one car. DH has the car and I have to cope with buses. It's just over an hour to travel 5 miles to work, with almost a mile to walk to the bus stop at our end.

My car failed its MOT last week because it had a chip/crack in the windscreen (which we think had only recently happened as we'd never seen it until pointed out by the garage). We've been without a car yesterday and today & I feel trapped and stressed. DH has taken the to school on the bus, but it's hard work as DD is tiny and walks so slowly. The windscreen should be fixed today. Fingers crossed.

Sorry for the long post! I absolutely hate cars Angry

PickleSarnie · 07/09/2016 10:42

There's a teeny tiny bit of me wants it to break down because there's a small red sos ( "trouble button" as the kids call it) that you press and it apparently calls the manufacturer and they send someone out to find you and fix it. I'm itching to push the damn thing. But, realistically, I hope I never have to.

isthistoonosy · 07/09/2016 10:50

whatis wouldn't you be faster and cheaper on a bicycle.

NapQueen · 07/09/2016 11:13

cest because if I go over my agreed mileage I owe them money at the end. I'd be fretting every time I needed to do a long journey!

OP posts:
whatishistory · 07/09/2016 11:19

isthis. No, a bike isn't practical. I carry a lot of books back and forth to work-anywhere up to 8 books and sometimes a few folders. I'm also on the coast of NE Scotlandand the wind can be brutal during the winter. It would also mean cycling down a dual carriageway that seems to attract idiotic driving.

I get fed up with the bus, but I can work from home at least once a week.

Togaparties · 07/09/2016 11:27

It's worth getting your MOT done a couple of weeks before it's due. The new one will run from the original expiry date and it gives you some time to get things fixed when convenient and not be suddenly car-less for a couple of days.

maggiethemagpie · 07/09/2016 11:28

I'm with you on this. My car currently is making a weird nose when I drive, mechanics can't diagnose it but it's passed its MOT so I'm just putting up with it.

My dad owes an MOT garage, so I just pay costs but it still cripples me every time something goes wrong, luckily I know I'm not being scammed.

Magicpaintbrush · 07/09/2016 11:33

The anxiety is probably because the car is something people rely on so heavily. I couldn't get my child to school without the car as there is no safe route we can walk, so I need those wheels! I freak out at MOT time too, I hate hate hate being without my car, even for a few hours, I feel like I have lost a limb. It's like having your freedom taken away. And the fear of a huge bill for repairs is absolutely justified. We have all been there.

ihatethecold · 07/09/2016 11:40

Picklesarnie??
here's a teeny tiny bit of me wants it to break down because there's a small red sos ( "trouble button" as the kids call it) that you press and it apparently calls the manufacturer and they send someone out to find you and fix it. I'm itching to push the damn thing. But, realistically, I hope I never have to.

I think someone's having you over?

whatishistory · 07/09/2016 11:43

I have that SOS button, too! I vaguely remember getting a year's subscription when we bought the car. I never looked into it after then. We have a Citroen DS3. Looks lovely, but I would never buy another one!

Titsalinabumsquash · 07/09/2016 11:50

I'm the same! But that's because I have shockingly bad luck with cars wether they be old or brand new.

Our old (but new) Zafira, in the space of a week, had 2 tyre blowouts, a new clutch, windscreen wipers stopped working and and a sensor fail.... then after we'd paid out thousands to fix it, a deer ran in the road in front of us and wrote the fucking thing off. Hmm

PickleSarnie · 07/09/2016 12:26

Haha ihatethecold Possibly. But it does exist! Apparently its also got a feature that when the airbags go off, it alerts someone and then they phone your car and see if you respond. Not that I'd trust mercedes to actually bother their arses if the disorganisation of their sales reps are in any way representative of the company as a whole!!

The button looks a bit like this......

To find it almost devastating when something goes wrong with the car
ihatethecold · 07/09/2016 12:40

Wow. I've never heard of one of those buttons before.

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