Dd and Hungarian boy in her class

[GastonsPomPomWrath]

This is wwyd situation. Please be gentle with me.

It's my children's first day back at school today. Dd is 8 and has just started year 4. She's a bright child, top of the class, good in all subjects.

There's a new boy in the class. We'll call him Y. Y is Hungarian and speaks no or very very limited English at the moment.

The teacher has put my dd with Y to partner him in everything. She must work with him, talk to him, play with him at play time and lunchtime and help him during dinner in the hall. He has to copy her work exactly so he can learn to write our language. Dd didn't manage to finish her work because Y was struggling to keep up with her.

Dd told the teacher that she was having trouble understanding him and him understanding her and the teacher replied that she "hasn't got a choice" and she "must teach him how to speak and write English."

Now I do understand that the boy is probably better off being integrated in the classroom to pick up the way things are done and the language but is it totally reasonable for the teacher to carry on with her lesson whilst letting my dd teach Y? The school don't seem to have any resources or staff available to teach one to one for children who don't use English as their first language. The teaching assistant didn't offer any help (I asked Dd)

Would you be happy with this situation?

Dd came home asking me to help her figure out how she will communicate with him tomorrow.

[Owllady]

My dog has never eaten another dog

[SukeyTakeItOffAgain]

And they also go to school to learn about other people, and learn about kindness and empathy if no one is teaching them at home.

"Dog eat dog world"? They're EIGHT FFS.

How unutterably depressing your posts are :(

[cannotlogin]

do you teach, Manon?

[Owllady]

Ahh they're not depressing Sukey, they just highlight the narrow minded posters you should stay away from
I love they think they are more intelligent though :weeps with laughter:

[TinklyLittleLaugh]

My DS had this at about the same age with a little Afghan boy. I imagine they chose him because he is a kind, conscientious child.

On day one the little lad didn't like his school dinner so (probably with the best of intentions) scraped his leftovers onto DS's plate, to general disgust from everyone. On day two, DS was messing about with a pal and little Afghan lad thought DS was being pushed around and piled in trying to batter DS's mate. Again probably with the best intentions.

By day three DS was sobbing that Afghan boy was ruining his life and wanted nothing to do with him. I popped into the school to clarify the situation and his teacher was horrified that DS thought he was solely responsible for this child. It is really easy for kids to get the wrong end of the stick, I would talk to the teacher.

[SukeyTakeItOffAgain]

But Owllady, they're out there They're parents FFS.

Maybe I will emigrate after all. To Bhutan.

[Ninasimoneinthemorning]

queen it doesn't matter if the teacher has infinite resources or funds! It really isn't this child's responsibility to teach a child that can't even speak English. It's effecting her work. So yes it has had a detrimental effect or does it not matter?

[GastonsPomPomWrath]

I'm shocked at the way this thread has turned.

I don't really understand why I'm taking such a bashing here. I've been told that my daughter is a very bright child who is one of 5/6 at the top of the class. I don't see what the problem is with that. It's not bragging, I think it's relevant that the teacher trusts her. But I'm concerned that she is struggling already with the responsibility that seems to have been put on her.

Im not a shit stirrer. I've written exactly what my daughter told me. As some of you have pointed out, it might be that she has misunderstood and I will check as soon as I can.

I haven't said the boy shouldn't be in school. I haven't made any nasty comments about him or his family. I understand that he should be in school and I want my daughter to be accepting and friendly towards him but from the way she's described it, he needs more help than just her.

Thank you for all those sensible replies.

[Ninasimoneinthemorning]

2stripped go back and read op posts: what you have posted is untrue

[Secretmetalfan]

I would be talking to the teacher to clarify the situation then if necessary the head teacher. I would not be happy in the situation. The non English speaker needs adult help and your dd needs space

[cannotlogin]

I love they think they are more intelligent though :weeps with laughter:

The primary class I mentioned up thread....the 'top table' in that class of 30 consisted of 6 children who were all, without exception, children who spoke a language other than English at home. One of them spent at least 2 months a year in her home country due to her father's work patterns - and was working with a different script from her home language as well. She was still 'top of the class'. By about 200 miles. And that's in an area where foreigners are still relatively uncommon!

[ManonLescaut]

I'm not a teacher no, the people I was discussing it with were.

It's not uncommon at secondary level.

[OwlinaTree]

I've only read the 1st page, so apologies if someone has already said this.

When we have had EAL students at school, we have been lucky enough to get some sort from the LA. In their recommendations they have often said that an effective strategy is to ask other pupils to work with the student to help them. However, it also says that this role should be shared around so that no pupils are adversely affected.

So it sounds like teacher is using a recommended strategy, but not correctly.

[SukeyTakeItOffAgain]

OP just so you know, my last few posts weren't directed at you.

However I do think you're worrying unnecessarily at the moment. They've been back, what, a day or two? ( unless you're in Scotland.) It's not currently affecting her work. They won't have done any yet.

[cannotlogin]

It's not uncommon at secondary level

there are whole schools of thought, theories, pedagogy, based on pairing weaker children with stronger children. Some schools work that way. Some individual teachers work that way. I am not sure it necessarily has anything at all to do with not being able to cope with the class in front of them. .

[GastonsPomPomWrath]

Sukey - it's not her work I'm worried about. I haven't meant to come across as being solely bothered about her work. It's more that she feels pressured by it. She's usually one to be helpful and kind but I think she feels responsible for the boy and she seemed a bit at a loss when she said she had no idea how she was going to communicate with him tomorrow.

[DelicatePreciousThing1]

The OP's will not necessarily know it is a temporary fix, though. Kinda the point.

...sigh...

[DelicatePreciousThing1]

The OP's child might not think this is a temporary arrangement, though. That's the point.

...sigh...

[DelicatePreciousThing1]

Wish we could edit posts here.

[DoinItFine]

If this were my 8 year old, I would presume she had misunderstood what was being asked of her in terms of her total responsibility for everything.

I would have a chat to the teacher at pickup to clarify the situation and explain what my child had understood.

I can't imagine that one child (a girl at that) is being all the responsibility for helping a little boy find his feet.

Everyone in the class will be included in that.

If she is eager to please, she might well have got herself in a bit of a tizz about this because it will be the big talking point of the return to school and the new kid will still be a massive novelty for them.

Talk her down and be exvited for her to get to know this new boy from a country she (probably?) doesn't know much about.

Tell her about Hungarian and Finnish and their relationship to each other as languages, or whatever kind of thing she will find intetesting.

It'll be fine.

But it's the start of a new year, so don6let it get off to a bad start.

Clarify, explain, smooth etc.

[PartiallyStars]

For those who don't believe that a teacher would say a particular child is top of the class, DS's year 1 teacher said exactly that. It's not particularly professional, and his reception teacher was very much the other way, talking in teacher-language only - exceeding expectations etc - but Ms Year 1 was young and gushing and most definitely told us that DS was top of the class. In those words. So it does happen.

[Ninasimoneinthemorning]

What's depressing is the fact that posters expect children to take on the burden of teaching another non English speaking child at the expense of her own education - which is ironically what posters want the little boy to have - all under the guise of empathy. As empathy will really help you pay the bills or keep your family when your an adult. This practise has to stop.

It's got nothing to do with empathy from the child, she is right ffs! it's about the teacher and the school getting their shit together and not even expecting this.

[Ninasimoneinthemorning]

partially your not allowed to admit on MN that your kid excels in anything.