AIBU about people who offer alternative health therapies?

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I like alternative health stuff: acupuncture, osteopathy, herbalism, naturopathy, deep tissue massage. I believe they have their place in a healthy lifestyle and they work for me, so making time for myself via these things is good and they make me feel good too.

I am not rolling in cash so see these therapists ad hoc. I tell them upfront that I can't afford to see them every week but I am happy to take what I can from ad hoc sessions. If I ever miss a booked session for whatever reason I always pay the cancellation fee because I respect other people's time. And on my birthday, people know to contribute to and/or buy me a session with one of them.

But I am continually blown away by the outrage I receive from them for not seeing them more frequently. And the barely concealed tactic of telling me that I shouldn't leave it long before I come back because of (something to do with ) my health.

An example is a woman I see for acupuncture. She is very well respected in her field and she is good at it. What she does really works for me. I saw her three weeks ago before the birth of my baby and she helped with some SPD pain i had. At the end of the session she insisted that I Skype her from the hospital the day after the birth and tell her how I was feeling and get her to come in and give me a few needles.

I said no. And that I would be in touch when i next wanted acupuncture. I am three weeks post partum and I have so far received 12 emails from her asking how I am and if I need anything. I have replied to 3 of them, saying I'm fine, baby is fine, thank you for her concern and I will be in touch when I need something. But still the emails are coming thick and fast reminding me that I need to come and see her to give my post birth healing the best chance, and the implication is if I don't I am causing myself a problem of some kind.

Here's what I don't get - She is good at what she does. It works. She is not a con artist. She has no need to force herself on people. But for some reason this money-grabbing masquerading as "concern" and this apparently "relaxed hippy attitude" barely concealing quite an aggressive pursuit of sales, is utterly off putting. Why can't she see that?

If this were just a one-off it would be an "AIBU about this acupuncturist?" But I have had it with many others too. I posted about an osteopath, a perfectly good osteopath who solved a lot of my back problems, who had no need to go begging for clients. a few years ago when I had my first DC. She used to send emails and make calls trying to guilt trip me into seeing her more frequently to help with my DC's "neck problems" (which she had diagnosed herself.) The implication was that if I didn't come once a week for the problem she had diagnosed and was trying to treat, then I was somehow not giving my baby the best start in life. When I reminded her that I could not afford it she said I should reorganise my priorities!

There have been others - not as persistent as these two, but people who have gone cold with me or annoyed if I see them for one session here and there and do not see them more regularly or follow their suggested "course of treatment," which usually involves extended sessions booked in advance and usually carrying cancellation fees if I cannot attend.

Can any alternative health people tell me why this is? Is it a lack of formal training which makes them not good at setting boundaries with clients? Or respecting boundaries when they are set by the client? I am fed up of having to stop seeing people who are really good at what they do because they overstep the mark, and then having to find someone else. Also I am fed up of not being able to use these therapies how I want to use them without having a whole lifestyle or regime forced on me whic orientates solely around that therapy.

Alternative therapies. Also known as quackery and charlatanism.

As the well known saying goes, what do you call alternative medicine that works? Medicine.

You are surprised that mountebanks are keen to sell as much snake oil as they can? More fool you.

Acupuncture to tap into the magic energy lines in your body works does it?

Or could it possibly be your body's normal reaction to having needles stabbed in it-a release of adrenelin and endorphin.

They are a scam and regular, repeat treatments is part of the scam.

And as others have pointed out, if 'alternative' medicine worked, it would be called 'medicine'.

Stop letting yourself be taken advantage of.

Osteopaths should be registered with the General Osteopathic Council, so drop a few hints about pushy sales tactics breaching her Code of Conduct and she will probably back off.

I'd say it was a private healthcare thing, as well as an alternative medicine thing, look at how over medicalised the US medical system is, because the more they do, the more you pay.

Ignoring the nay-Sayers I think there are two parts to this.

First, some of these treatments make the most sense if you have a few sessions in a short period of time. I love acupuncture and find it works best for me this way.

Likewise osteopathy if I have had a problem.

Personally I discuss with therapist that I'm using or thinking of using, how they like to structure it and charge, before we start working together. I tend not to do it if
Money (or more likely time in my case) would make that difficult.

However the best therapists I know are respectful of my time / money. And so I am a long term client, even though sometimes I'll go months without seeing them. I have an osteopath and a herbalist like this. Also an acupuncturist although she is currently taking maternity leave. My osteopath helps me manage a long term spinal condition (scoliosis) far better than conventional medicine ever has. So I do discuss with him how often to visit, especially if I've had a problem. But last time I saw him he said 'come when you feel'.

I've found a replacement accupuncutist and i don't like her as much, for some of the reasons you describe.
Some of this is touting for business, I'm sure but she is very busy so I don't think it's just that. Her personality is very ordered and she likes to know her schedule in advance. Whereas I am more 'as and when' and will often slot in a treatment at short notice.

12 emails does sound a lot.
However an accupuncutist would consider that good support could be offered shortly after birth. Many of my therapists are generous with their time and would often, say, visit after a birth free of charge.

I think you need to find better therapists!

The reason why alternative treamtents take longer to work is because the body is a self healing organism and thats how long it takes to heal itself.
The therapy only offers a placebo.

If it were effective it would have to be licensed and regulated the way medicine is.

I've seen that pushy attitude in alternative practitioners, including an aromatherapist who would push her services at ecvery opportunity - including once at a firework and bonfire party. Hardly the place for a soothing massage.

I think that in the west our attitude to medicine is that if we are ill we get help, from wherever. In Eastern medicine, such as acupuncture or Ayurveda, your practitioner is there to keep you healthy and in balance. You have regular sessions to stay healthy, the 5 elements are balanced or the doshas are balanced. When you get ill, you are out of balance, thus the urge to continue to have treatment even when you are healthy. ( I agree though that this does not always sit well with your pocket).
Other treatments such as massage, osteoporosis etc fall more in line with a western attitude to health. It's broke....fix it.
Yes and some therapists are pushy.

I grew up with traditional remedy including the old school bonesetter. She sounds unprofessional and I would consider finding an alternative. If she's the only one that you trust with your treatment, I'd just schedule an appointment at your leisure.

I didn't read your full posting when I posted my previous reply. She's got no professional boundary and unethical. Just ignore her emails. Don't bother to JADE - Justify, Argue, Defend and Explain. Schedule as and when necessary if you still intend on seeing your current therapists. If in person after treatment, poker face response "I'll give you a call to schedule" and leave.

Leaving aside the issues surrounding the ethics of a lot of this stuff, there is a fundamental difference between the healthcare model that we are used to in the UK (i.e. service delivery via the NHS) and what alternative practitioners are doing (i.e. running a business). Even if you are not a fan of conventional medicine, if you grew up in the UK you probably have natural, reflex assumption that anything you consider to be healthcare is not predominantly about money.

But, if the practitioner is running a business, they have other considerations. The need to generate income being one of them, and as ExAsterix mentioned, the need to protect their reputation being another.

It's like giving your phone number to an insurance company when you ask them for a quote. Unless you specifically tell them not to, they will phone you every year at renewal time.

You have previously done business with these people. They have your contact details. They are a commercial enterprise. It's not realistic to think that they won't try to drum up repeat business.

I am not an alternative therapist. I am trained by and work in the nhs (training takes many years). I explain to small private practice that to help, they need to commit. If they do not, I will not offer treatment. It would be unethical, just as giving/taking antibiotics for only one day would be. These people probably do believe in what they are doing, but that doesn't mean that it works, and if long term treatment was necessary, it should have been stipulated from the start. (I do not believe in woo). Can you imagine a gp not telling you that anti bs need to be taken for the full length of treatment before giving them to you?

I've seen osteopaths and an acupuncturist and NONE of them behaved like this. This is someone touting for business, pure and simple. I'd junk her emails and fine another practitioner.

*find

That's not my experience. Maybe you need to go to different people
Didn't realise i'd been doing the 'woo stuff'
I'Ve had acupuncture through my doctors numerous times after finding physio no good.
They seem to be recommending it more and more lately. ( doctors in general, not just mine).
Can't say it helped my problem but i did feel generally more calm for few days afterwards, each time.
I also go for massage to help my pain and damage.
My gp did recommend this and it has been fantastic for me.
I don't go every week and sometimes have to cancel due to bad health.
I'm never bombarded nor told my symptoms will get worse if i don't return nor told my health will get better it's just to help manage it.
I too take some supplements, but these were not recommended by anyone, just something i found online.