AIBU to get offended by this woman

[welshpixie]

In the supermarket this afternoon, waiting to pay, unfortunately the card machine was not working, a woman who i can only describe as Jabba the Huts female twin huffs loudly and says "Fuck this, the stupid fucking Ginger is taking too long" , I can't decide if I am annoyed at her for referring to me this way, or whether I am pleased I am still passable as a red head.

Not the point of this thread but my ex personal trainer used to yell at me "Come on Jabba!!" when we were running up mountains.

I really can't get over how many people seethe to themselves but don't speak up in environments where it's very unlikely you'd be attacked.

What do you think OP should have done, other than smile sweetly?

Her rudeness to your face is massively worse than you bitching on an anonymous Internet forum

I didn't call you a ginger.
I called you a whinger.

And my new exfoliation regime is taking a little time to perfect. Hence the scaly toes.

Oooohhhh all the holier than thou folk are out tonight! Form a line to be canonised pleeeeeease

She sounds like a cunt OP

Either speak up or ignore it. I don't see why anyone takes pride in passive aggressive choices.

Mabey she did not know what to say at the time, we don't all come armed with come back ya know. So what if she is bitching on an anonymous internet forum, isen't AIBU full of it anyway! Op I would have probably have done the same as you, but not put in on Mumsnet, for fear of the hollier than thou brigade. Actually I thought the same thing when my MIL who is 24 stone, told me I was putting on weight, and that I would need two seats on the aeroplane, and a seatbelt extender. Oh she was only 'joking' of course, I am used to her fat jibes, I am a size 14 btw and excercise every day. I felt like ripping her a piece, but we were staying with her in her holiday home and I did not want an argument.

She never makes fat jokes at dh who is 17 stone and 6ft tall, only directed at me somehow.

If you consciously make a choice to respond in a passive aggressive manner it would take less time to ignore it completely if you didn't know what to say.

I can't believe someone swore at OP, insulted her, yet she's in the wrong for smiling

She was rude to OP and OP simply vented on here, she didn't say it to her face.

Are all you holier than thou pps saying you've never had a bitchy thought after someone had upset you?

Where did I say that the woman's original comments were acceptable? They weren't.

I just think passive aggressive behaviour benefits no one, least of all the people who use it.

Since you've kept your criticism for op sooty it looks like you think that

YANBU, can't believe the self-righteousness going on here!

I think op response to that woman was perfect, she smiled and waked away. You cannot argue with someone like that, as op might have got a mouth full abuse. Good on you op!

I love a bit of pass agg myself - it is my 'go to' response to rude people - I am far too British to be directly rude.

The issue that people have is that her looks/size is irrelevant. Being ginger is just a fact and nothing to be ashamed of but slagging her off on here about being overweight is bitchy.

Either say something at the time in that situation or don't, although (and I say this as someone who suffers from fairly extreme anxiety) why would you give it a second thought? She may have been in a hurry, she may just have been a twat but I would bet she's forgotten all about it.

And this really happened? Course it did on the Jeremy kyle show.

livia the woman was downright nasty and vile, if she confronted her, she probably would have got a mouth full of abuse from someone like tgat. No op did the right thing, smiled and walked away. The bad thing is she vented on here with the oh so perfect and sancatmonious Brigade! Sometime I feel Mumsnet is in a parallel universe, some of the responses on her support that.

I would have said. I might be slow but don't mess with the redhead.