to expect dog owners to help in this situation

[cansu]

I have a dc with severe autism. He is non verbal and has significant learning disabilities. He walks in a slightly odd way, hand flaps and makes odd noises so he is quite visibly different. He is also scared of certain noises and is frightened of dogs despite my own parents having two lovely little dogs who have never harmed him. Whenever we go out for a walk, he gets v upset by dogs running towards him. I try and put myself in front of them. I make it clear he is scared but dog owners invariably chuckle and tell me oh he is just giddy, no harm in him etc etc, making no effort at all to either call dog over or put hand on dogs collar whilst we pass by. Meanwhile ds is flapping, shouting, running into bushes etc. He is an older teen so not possible to scoop him up if I see a dog coming over. I don't expect dog to be on lead, but would it be unreasonable for a dog owner, once they have twigged situation to call over dog whilst we pass by??

[PageStillNotFound404]

OhThatThingAgain while I agree with your general point, it's worth pointing out that not everyone gets their dog as a puppy (I always take on adult rescues, for example) and it can be a lot harder to eradicate bad habits - or even not to know that a bad habit exists until the first time it manifests itself - than to instill good ones from the off. Also not all dogs are food motivated.

[MyWineTime]

he obviously spotted or smelled the treats I carry for the dog
just keeping a couple of treats in her pocket to distract a persistent dog
Carrying treats is more likely to attract a dog than that distract them, and then encourage them to come back for more.

[MiscellaneousAssortment]

I find it increasingly annoying that disablist stuff is allowed to stand when it comes in this format.

When posters have harsh but superficially 'reasonable' sounding opinions, that turn out to be disablist prejudice and discrimination when the logic of their 'harmless opinions' is examined.

It's unacceptable to excuse disability discrimination in this way.

Equality should be the baseline of any debate, not the subject of the debate.

This thread should never have been lowered to someone positioning a disabled teen beneath the rights of dogs to be out in public.

Sorry, I get over protective when I see fellow posters who do a bang up job every hour of every day looking after their children, have to put up with the trickle trickle trickle of this rubbish.

< Steps off soap box> Ahem. As you were.

Pats friendly dog on its lead.

[ItShouldHaveBeenJess]

I like you, *Miscellaneous'.

I also find it interesting how much is made of people with ASD being unable to 'read' social cues, and yet throughout this thread, we have seen examples of NT types who are equally struggling.

[ConfusedintheNorth]

All dogs in any public space should by law be on a lead... so no YANBU at all.

[honkinghaddock]

By allowing the two comments to stand, mumsnet is indeed condoning the view that severely disabled people like my son have less rights than other human beings and should only be allowed out in places where they can't possibly inconvenience anyone else.

[PageStillNotFound404]

All dogs in any public space should by law be on a lead

This is a common misunderstanding. Dogs must be on a lead in designated pedestrian zones and where livestock is present, and it's illegal for a dog to be "dangerously out of control in public", but not being on a lead does not automatically equal being out of control, nor is it automatically illegal for a dog not to be on a lead in public.

[Puzzledandpissedoff]

Reminds me of my own SN lad being attacked and me asking the dog owners to put their pet on a lead

I was told to put him on a lead instead

[Ameliablue]

Of course, I generally don't let my dog run up to people but I would certainly call her close to heel if someone was visibly scared of her.

[WaitrosePigeon]

All dogs in any public space should by law be on a lead... so no YANBU at all.

I'm afraid you're wrong there.

[PitchFork]

All dogs in any public space should by law be on a lead... so no YANBU at all.

would be great imo
too many dog owners/handlers have no idea what 'close control' actually means.

[ohtheholidays]

Of course YANBU but they are the bloody idiots!

We have 3 Dogs and 5DC,2 of our DC are autistic,they love our Dogs and our Dogs love them but we'd never ever let any of our Dogs run upto someone elses child/children let alone a child that we could quite obviously see is autistic and getting distraught because a Dog is near them.

[DriveInSaturday]

Puzzled, that's appalling.

Yesterday I had a good forest bike ride with DS (ASD, teen, scared of dogs). I asked dog owners to hold their dogs as we went past, and they were all happy to do so.

I have found in the past that the further away from the forest car parks you are, the more considerate the dog owners.

There are some people round here who own dogs but don't see why they should walk more than 200 yards into the forest with them. They have no consideration for their own pets' needs, so it's not a surprise to find that they have no empathy for others. Giving car parks (and the parts of forest near housing) a wide berth avoids most of them, as well as the 'status dog' types who actually want you to be scared of their dog.

Back to the positive bit. Everyone yesterday was lovely. People who care enough about their own dogs to give them proper exercise are generally thoughtful and kind people.

[WankingMonkey]

I don't expect dog to be on lead You should. Especially in public places I do not really see why people let their dogs off the leader..yes your dog may be friendly but ANY dog has the potential to turn and hurt someone. They can hurt just by playing, it doesn't even have to be turning.

I would just give them the death stare and say my son is afraid, I don't care how friendly your dog is. And hope that would work tbh

[merrymouse]

People let their dogs of the lead because many dogs are well trained and under control.

It's the people who think that they have no responsibility to control their dog or put it on a lead that cause problems (For dog lovers and dog haters and dogs).

[WankingMonkey]

People let their dogs of the lead because many dogs are well trained and under control.

I don't believe any dog can have instinct completely trained out of them. And instinct is to attack if they feel threatened in any way.

Having said that, we used to let our Lab off the leader in forests and such (Hamsterly Forest..where people often go hiking and such so its not exactly secluded) as we did believe she was well trained and was very very very unlikely to ever do harm to anyone. Also she never jumped up at people and that, which is an issue I see again and again with other peoples dogs. Despite knowing how well trained she was, I would never have let her off in a place filled with people, such as a public park.

[tabulahrasa]

"I don't believe any dog can have instinct completely trained out of them. And instinct is to attack if they feel threatened in any way. "

A well trained dog out for a walk with a responsible owner is fairly unlikely to feel threatened though.

They'd be somewhere close to their owner, playing or training with them or having a bit of a sniff - not wandering off near strangers.

[OhThatThingAgain]

WM I agree totally. The best trained pet can act on instinct. But unfortunately there seem to be tons of dog owners (not so many on here) who think that their precious pets are just cute and friendly and can run wild.

Keep your dog on a lead in a public space, and let them free where it's safe to roam. Our local council actually have a fenced off locked dog area in the park. It's lovely if you go at 7am, because those people are usually genuine dog people (it's kind of a social scene, we're friends). I'd not chance my luck at 3pm on a Saturday. Those are the same people that OP met when walking with her son it seems :(

I once had to get off my horse to catch a loose dog, putting myself and my horse in danger. I took a stirrup leather off and used it as a leader, when I finally found the woman she got told in no uncertain terms that she could have caused a traffic accident or worse. Bloody idiot, thank god my horse didn't bolt. She said oh I just got her from Battersea yesterday, I was like you understand recall? She said no. FFS!

[Paintedhandprints]

Yanbu. But didn't you know op? We live in a country full of dog-lovers. Most of whom think they are their fur-babies. Yuck.

[WaitrosePigeon]

Here we go again Navy

[AppleSetsSail]

Yanbu. But didn't you know op? We live in a country full of dog-lovers. Most of whom think they are their fur-babies. Yuck.

You do know that the vast majority of dog people find the 'fur-babies' brigade as weird as you do?