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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think more notice would have been nice!

39 replies

WinterIsHereJon · 28/08/2016 11:01

8am this morning we had a knock at the door. It was our rear neighbour (i.e. their garden backs onto ours) to tell us that they are replacing the fence so please could we keep our dog indoors. Before I can even nip to let her out for a wee (in pjs!) her DH has already started taking the fence panels out. This in itself wouldn't be a huge issue, but for the fact that we are hosting a family party this afternoon and it would have been nice to have use of my garden
AIBU to think 5 minutes is not really a polite amount of notice? The noise from his tools is loud, he has the radio blaring and I've no idea how I will manage with all the neices and nephews cooped up indoors later! Rant over!

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 28/08/2016 12:23

Just use your garden.

Er, no. If they take down their fence panels and don't secure their garden, that is their issue. Just tell them the dog will be let out as usual.

I actually think it is the dog owner's responsibility to ensure their dog can't escape. It's why my dog can't go out unless he's on a long line and I am going to have to spend £££ replacing a fence that is not mine.

Helgathehairy · 28/08/2016 12:24

sanityclause Even though it's clearly NOT the issue - why would a family party next door be an issue if hosting after a funeral?? We had a gathering after my fathers funeral and it involved quite a few kids running around the garden and people sitting around chatting and laughing and eating (the adults were inside to be fair, it was January).

SoupDragon · 28/08/2016 12:24

You can't demand they do the work another day. You can demand that they don't encroach on your garden whilst doing it but they can replace their fence whenever is convenient for them.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 28/08/2016 12:26

Have your party outside as planned.

People would be supervising the kids on the play equipment anyway if there are toddlers using it so do it.

Don't have a dog so can't comment on that issue.

Bugsylugs · 28/08/2016 12:27

You could check your council site ours bans loud DIY and garden work on a Sunday. Never knew that until checked after a previous mumsnet thread then you could ask them to clear up and keep noise down. Very unreasonable re notice.

Trifleorbust · 28/08/2016 12:28

Soup: With reasonable notice of the change, I would agree with you. But otherwise, no. They should have given their neighbours the chance to erect a temporary barrier to stop the dog escaping. They can't demand it stays inside, that is unreasonable.

Floralnomad · 28/08/2016 12:29

I really can't see the issue , unless the garden is tiny , keep dog on a lead , tell children to stay away from the fencing and ask neighbour to keep his mess to a minimum and turn the radio down a bit . If the man is anything like us we make decisions on the day about what DIY is being done as some is weather dependent .

Mummyoflittledragon · 28/08/2016 12:41

So the legals: he cannot come on your land without your permission.
Regarding the dog. You have responsibility to keep you animals off other people's land. However, the land owners also have responsibility to protect their land from other people's animals. In other words. If you chose to let your dog out and it went onto their land, really and honestly, tough. However, if they are unscrupulous people, they may decide to let it onto their street out the front door. So best to keep it inside or on a lead.

Regarding the work, I would ask them to erect the new panels and remove the remaining panels one at a time if possible. And get your own music go over the top of theirs or ask if they wouldn't mind turning it down a bit once your guests have arrived. I'd try and keep it as amicable as possibly tbh. They've been thoughtless rather than vindictive. You're having a party and they're doing diy. Maybe together the two households can have a workable situation.

BurningBridges · 28/08/2016 12:43

Sanity - now there's an oxymoron if ever I saw one

Mummyoflittledragon · 28/08/2016 12:47

BurningBridges.

Chewbecca · 28/08/2016 12:59

I'd still use the garden for the party but keep the dog on a lead.

ReggaeShark · 28/08/2016 13:40

Put dog on a long lead. Tell him you're having a party and children present so tools need to be out of reach. Offer him a drink and a hot dog when you bbq and get relatives to help with the fence. It will be done in an hour. Win win.

SanityClause · 28/08/2016 14:28

Okay, well as he's using your garden, I agree that he is out of order. We have re-fenced our garden on two sides, and later rebuilt a wall which fell down in the Christmas storms a few years ago, all without access to the neighbours gardens.

There's nothing stopping you from telling him that he can't have access to your garden today, as you have a party.

And no, I'm not suggesting you should give notice every time you have a few friends over. I'm saying neighbours should live and let live a little.

He wasn't to know it would be inconvenient for you, today.

Unnecessarily bitchy, BurningBridges.

Crunchymum · 28/08/2016 14:38

Why didn't you mention this party to them at 8am?

They knock and advise you about the fence, you say "that is fine but we'll be using the garden from 3pm as we have people coming over, can you make sure you are done by then / things are safe and secure"

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