about playfighting

[balia]

I've got another thread about my specific situation but really wanted to get a sense of how people feel about play fighting between siblings.

I hate it, think it is just an excuse for violence, but do other people think it is normal? Is it different for boys/girls? Do you feel like it is ok sometimes? Does it depend on the ages of the kids involved? All opinions welcome - am worried I am over-reacting.

[MrsMook]

My two are quite evenly matched. They have to stop if the other is unhappy with it. It helps them to learn their strength and control it.

I used to play fight with my much older brother.

[lessthanBeau]

Although I didn't encourage it with just DD and DS, they did have Friday night wrestling fights with dh, with an adult it didn't get out of control as they were on the same team against dh, however DD ended up with a broken nose around age 8 that has since needed 2 operations to correct it one at 16 and then a further one at 22, so even with an adult in charge accidents do happen. Just to clarify dh didn't hit DD in the face, he used to throw them on the sofa and DDS knees came up and smacked herself in the nose. Good times, my kids would say!

[redexpat]

Dd1 and ds4 love wrestling each other on our bed, and sometimes the sofa. There is a whole chapter in playful parenting about playfigghting. Could you get hold of a copy?

[balia]

I love a good book recommendation, redexpat thanks, will look into it. The way that most people are describing play fighting here makes it sound more like a contact sport, with adult supervision/involvement, rules and almost an etiquette? I'm still not convinced, TBH, but it has been helpful in working out in my own head that the issues are with my specific situation and not just a result of my bias against play fighting. So thank you!