To question my Close Friends for staying in touch with my ex..?

[DooRight]

My oldest friends appear to be sidelining me, in favour of my ex and her new partner. - my friends only met her through me - she left me....

My ex & I have both moved on - but I am finding this hard to accept

should I be disappointed - or just not surprised...?

ShatnersWig - I can emphasis with that too - change "Xmas" to "Wedding" and we have the same story... - My MO is (whenever possible) "..Do as you would be done by..." - I would like to think that I wouldn't do the same to any of my friends - if the roles were reversed...

empathise * Dummy..

I think that you are being a bit unreasonable, but emotions don´t always follow reason and you feel how you feel about this. I think you are bit unreasonable because 10 years is a significant chunk of time to be friends with someone and as you have both moved on, I can see why your friends would feel that they should be able to maintain a friendship with both of you.

I don´t think you can change your friends´minds about this or that you should attempt to do so. The only thing you can control here is how you feel. What could you do that would make you feel better?

YABU if you think they shouldn't be friends with her anymore.

However, the main problem actually seems to be that they are now sidelining you, and YANBU to be upset about this.

I hate this sort of situation - because the one who's willing for everyone to still be friends STILL gets treated like they are at fault, or sidelined, if the other person isn't willing to be pleasant. Worse with absuive or controlling people who will feed others lies .

Unless the ex had been violent or abusive I wouldn't see the break up as a reason to change my behaviour towards either party.

sonjadog - I think that the die is cast - there is not much I can do to influence events - but as to how I feel about them - as kennyppppppppp says - "Be More Lion" seems to be the way forward - and I like the sound of that.....