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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this woman has a brass neck

68 replies

fortifiedwithtea · 22/08/2016 10:51

I'm bemused by this cheeky woman. We have blackberries growing in front garden. We also have them in the back to the point that we have far more than we can eat.

Our car is parked outside our front gate and my DC and I were getting in the car. I was just getting in the passenger side when a woman in her sixties stopped, picked a blackberry front our front garden, ate it and walked on. I smiled at her but she refused to make eye contact.

AIBU to think she should have asked first, seeing as I was there? I'm not precious about the blackberries but she wasn't to know that. For all she knows I could be a member of the WI and intent on making jam I'm not

If she had asked or had made eye contact so I could speak to her I'd have said bring a bowl and pick more she'd be doing me a favour.

OP posts:

PotofGold1186 · 22/08/2016 10:53

I think it would get my back up initially and then I would think, 'it's just a blackberry, get over yourself'

Mcchickenbb41 · 22/08/2016 10:55

We have a cherry tree out the front. People stand there blatantly eating them. I let them get on with it and occasionally warn them not to as we live on a very very busy rd and have a feeling they wouldn't be very healthy.

Cherrysoup · 22/08/2016 10:56

You think she has brass neck yet had she asked then you would have told her to get a bowlful? Make your mind up! How was she to know it was your garden? Blackberries are fair game, IMO, as they usually grow wild.

90daychallenger · 22/08/2016 10:58

I'd have shouted at her in a very panicked voice that she should't eat the blackberries off that bush as it's a favourite pissing spot for all the neighbourhood dogs. Then I'd have looked at her with a mixture of sympathy and panic.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 22/08/2016 11:01

Depends on whether they were right in your garden. If they are hanging over onto the pavement then I think fair enough; you share the scratchy brambles with the public you can share the fruit.

But mostly I'm thinking it was one blackberry! You need to get out more or just read some more threads if that's your definition of a brass neck. Hardly a Mexican house thief situation.

SawdustInMyHair · 22/08/2016 11:05

My parents had a mature holly tree in their garden near (but not over) the front wall, and used to have lots of people around December snipping bits off! My mum would shout "YOU'RE WELCOME" out of the window.

SerendipitousFoxley · 22/08/2016 11:09

I think it was bloody cheeky. But then it pales into insignificance when you read the thread with the Mexican House Thief on! ALSO on that thread was a woman who turned up to the poster's house ready to completely empty her gooseberry bushes. When she found them empty already (by the ACTUAL OWNERS) she wasn't repentant, or even embarrassed. She was furious because she had promised her guests a gooseberry based dessert and now had no gooseberries! Shocking cheek.

opensideno7 · 22/08/2016 11:15

Sounds to me like the fruit was outside your front garden, if she didn't need to enter your garden to pick it. I am pretty sure if it is overhanging the footpath all bets are off?

acasualobserver · 22/08/2016 11:20

Is yours one of those cultivated, thornless blackberries , OP? If so, you are right to feel affronted because you are actually responsible for growing it. However, if it's just a bramble that happens to be in front of your house and accessible from the pavement, then I think it's fair game.

SwishySplash · 22/08/2016 11:20

Oh dear, our neighbours blackberry bush has grown into our garden and I help myself . I thought they were fair game.

MajesticSeaFlapFlap · 22/08/2016 11:23

I do this if they are path side

MsKite · 22/08/2016 11:23

Why does it matter how old she was?
Also I'm wondering if she was younger than you and looked like she could "handle herself" would you have still tried to catch her eye or would you have decided that discretion was the better part of valour?

pictish · 22/08/2016 11:24

I think yabu to get possessive over brambles. They grow around the place - why would you expect deference over a bramble?

pictish · 22/08/2016 11:24

Majestic so do I.

MrsEricBana · 22/08/2016 11:25

Was she on the pavement when she picked it? If yes I wouldn't give it a second thought. Bit weird if she sprinted up your path, grabbed one, stuffed it in her mouth and ran off shouting "Nom nom!"

EttaJ · 22/08/2016 11:25

But they usually have maggots in them don't they, if they're not washed? At least that's my memory from hand picked blackberries, raspberries as a child.,

pictish · 22/08/2016 11:26

Swishy they are fair game. OP is being silly.

meck · 22/08/2016 11:27

It does depend where they were, perhaps. Are they ripe now? I thought we had a little while yet.

I remember the gooseberry post!

shinynewusername · 22/08/2016 11:27

Bit weird if she sprinted up your path, grabbed one, stuffed it in her mouth and ran off shouting "Nom nom!"

Hate it when that happens Blardy bramble addicts are just out of control round here.

meck · 22/08/2016 11:28

Yes, I'm too squeamish to eat straight from the bush, too maggoty.

DecaffCoffeeAndRollupsPlease · 22/08/2016 11:28

My old man used to knock and ask people if he could pick the mushrooms growing on their front gardens - so embarrassing. I used to wish he'd just nick the bloody things.

peppercold · 22/08/2016 11:29

That proper made me laugh Eric

Original poster

fortifiedwithtea · 22/08/2016 11:30

Ok someone link me to the Mexican House Thief, I think I need to have a read. The gooseberry story is a cracker

Yes it was obvious we are the owners of the house. No blackberries were not hanging over the pavement. I'd been gardening a couple of days before hand, had a prune, picked loads (we've had blackberry and apple crumble) .

I'm not begrudging, just think she should asked first out of courtesy then she could have had more.

OP posts:

ArmySal · 22/08/2016 11:30

We had a blackberry bush in the garden of our old house, against the fence so some of it was on the path side as people walked past.

One summer we took DD to the park, and as we began walking back down our street we could see a little old lady with a bucket, rummaging in the bush and putting berries into a bucket, occasionally stopping to eat one.

My first thought was "Bloody neck of her!", but then I thought of how embarrassed she'd be when she saw us go into our garden.

Nope, she gave a cordial "hello" and carried on picking as many as she could carry, even as she watched us go in through the front door.

I was

shovetheholly · 22/08/2016 11:36

A lot of people see them as weeds, and seem to think that because of this, they can do anything they like! It's just the same as if cherries or apples were growing in someone's garden - you don't just lean in and take them! Apart from anything else, there are LOADS for free on verges in the countryside! If a branch is growing over your side of the garden, however, those are your fruits and you can pick to your heart's content.

A relative of mine spent ages getting little plants to grow in a wall to make it look a bit prettier. Neighbour came over and was having a gas, then leaned over and pulled three of them out saying 'Your wall is really full of crap! Here you go!' He meant to be helpful!!

All that said, at the end of the day, it's JUST A BLACKBERRY!!

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