Aibu to no longer want to be known as the "beef thief"

[Purpleeggs]

This is so stupid 😂

I'm 25 have a dp and 2 year old daughter . When I was around 8 I was reaaaaally chubby 🙈 And would hoard food and basically eat anything I saw. I have a great uncle who is one of those tells shit jokes at every opportunity etc . When I was 8 in my chubby phase we stayed at there house for 2 weeks in the summer , my siblings and I. His wife who has now sadly passed was lovely but she was obsessed with my weight and put me on a strict diet which actually wasn't too bad but I was used to wolfing everything down. She also used to say kitchen closed at 6 pm. On the last Sunday of our stay she cooked a lovely roast with all the trimmings and gave me what I saw as a baby's portion. That night the rest of the beef went into the fridge in tin foil. I waited til everyone was sleeping and I ate the lot 😂 Didn't even slice it. My uncle caught me red handed with the plate and I've never lived it down.

Fast forward to now and every Sunday since his wife has passed uncle goes to my parents for dinner which we also attend and every bloody week hey beef thief is how I'm greeted. He tells the story all the time told my dp the first time he met him and my brothers new girlfriend today .

I want to punch him 😂🙄

It's like the old joke...
Bob is in the pub with his mate, complaining over a drink
"I saved 2 people from a burning building, and do they call me Bob the hero? No
And I won those races, but do they call me Bob the runner? No
And I played the organ in church for all those years, and do they call me Bob the musician?
But I shag one sheep..."

Or start laughing and say "hey do you remember that time I came into your room and you were having a sly wank? That was so funny the way you zipped up so fast!"

I can see the funny side and also the infuriating side.

My parents love to talk about how I used to have a bit of a temper as a child. It comes up almost every time we have a conversation. It gets pretty tiresome after a while.

Oh come on, it's kind of funny. I'm laughing. Everytime he greets you with "Hey Beef Thief", just say "Hey SpongeBob" or something ridiculous right back at him.

Why is it we have such a hard time telling people not to say things about us/tell childhood stories that are embarrassing or hurtful.

"Uncle Blabberfuckingmouth, I really dislike you calling me 'Beef Thief' and I am asking you to stop and to stop repeating that story to all and sundry. I don't consider either the name or the story very amusing. Thank you."

I had to say this to my brother who used to think his childhood nickname for me was amusing. I also had to tell him to stop telling a certain story about me as a child that he thought was funny.

Buy him a joint of beef and say you thought it was about time that tired old joke got closure? Might make the point!

Tell him that although he happened to catch you eating the food that one night...for the other thirteen nights you just licked everything and then put it back

Respond by calling him Uncle Child Starver?

Give him an envelope of cooked beef every year for Christmas and his birthday. Tell him when he shuts up that you'll give him a proper present.

Just tell him - on his own - no drama or anger - that the story and name upset you and you don't want to hear them anymore. If he is actually a nice person that'll be the end of it.

One Story Borey

Bless you, OP - I would hate that! I did plenty of things as a child, but my family (generally) let's it all lie. Thank god.

Right - here's what you can do. You wait until he's making fun of someone else - then you make your move. Your timing is critical. Then you say "Uncle X always makes the same joke/never forgets" or whatever. And give a real look around.

It worked for my friend, whose MIL was always commenting on her weight. Said MIL criticised someone else's weight, people were like and friend took her opportunity "MIL always comments on people's weight". She never did it again.

Or you could just go (Monica from Friends-style) "One time - 20yrs years ago- I ate some beef from the fridge - mentioned every Sunday forever more!!"

I had this, it used to upset me every time and in the end, whist they were all laughing, I said "yes I wish we didn't always talk about this because it makes me remember how upset and frightened I was by that and it still makes me sad!". My family don't tell that story now ...

it may work for you

The beef thief though 😂 It's very witty, I'm still laughing.

Hello OP,
Your uncle doesn't sound very nice. He puts me in mind of a story called The Blue Castle by LM Montgomery, recently mentioned in another thread. It's free to read at Gutenberg Australia and may provide inspiration.........

I think if he's a nice person who isn't doing it to put you down, then blueeyedpeas suggestion might be good
"Every time you tell that story it reminds me how upset and scared I was, and how I hated myself (etc). I don't ever find it funny. Can you stop now?'

If you think he'd cling on to his delusion of being a funny funny guy, and refusing to believe you are hurt by it... as then he'd have to acknowledge being a crashing bore for the last 2 decades, I'd suggest the more indirect route of rolling eyes and sighing loudly every time he starts with it, saying 'not again uncle (repeater!), do we have to have this every week?' Or 'do you know any new ones uncle?' Type stuff.

He thinks he's hilarious everytime he calls my parents house phone he will say "where are you? Are you at home" without fail. Fighting a losing battle

God he sounds a right pain in the arse. I can't stand that kind of stuff. It makes my face muscles ache with the effort of trying to laugh politely.

I second buying him a joint of beef

I don't find that stupid joke very funny at all to be honest. It is stupid and puerile.

If he is doing it just because he is awkward and dim that is one thing, (and I do not know what to do to counter it) but actually that sounds a bit nasty.

It's not the worst name :(

tell him he sounds like uncle in only fools and horses
"when i was in the war"
and then repeat it whenever he starts to tell the story

I feel for you, OP. I hate this shit - I hate that you have to smile indulgently at people mocking you. I'm all for self deprecation but this isn't the same. Talk to either your Uncle or another family member who can get your point across. You're not over sensitive, you don't lack a sense of humour and you don't have to take it.

If it makes you feel better I snuck back to the kitchen one night and ate all the filling out of a meat pie, but left the pastry top. My mum put the pie in the oven the following day for her and my dad's tea and didn't realise until she cut into it that it was just a pastry top. I never lived it down.

I'll have to ask my parents is there anything I could mention about him I really love him and he will go out of his way to help anybody but it's bloody exhausting . Thanks for all your replies