AIBU to panic about catering for 40 people

[M0rven]

I have 40 people coming for lunch next weekend for a family party. I'm not a confident hostess or cook so I'm now getting a bit stressed.

WIBU to just do a cold buffet ? I was thinking cold meat, cheese, salads .

It's mostly teenagers so I was going to get sausages / burgers for them to BBQ if it's dry .

How do I know the right quantities ?

Any tips / suggestions welcome .

I think people would LOVE a BBQ, if you're up for it, but your AIBU question referred to a panic about catering for 40, so I thought cold food / pizza would be easier. That's the only reason I thought best to avoid a BBQ

Good point

I was going to ask about GF, but seeing as you are GF, that's easy. Lidl and Aldi do really good burgers and sausages which are GF. My partner's kids are coeliacs and it is a shame when they go to things and can't even have a sausage (they expect to bring bread places, but not sausages).
Making a big pasta with GF pasta is also great at filling people/teens up, Lidl sell the pasta too.

Do the BBQ even if it means someone stood in the drizzle. Then people can sort themselves out (less hassle for you, more choice for them). The pizza sounds great too. Good idea about the salad, extra bread always makes sense.

When you cater for something big, remember that you're not running a restaurant and if folk expect that, they should go to a restaurant.

For the dessert, you could also do a DIY thing, putting out the fruit, shop bought meringues, some whizzed up berries as a sauce, cream or ice cream. Absolutely no shame in asking people to bring items! Some mad people actually like doing this kind of thing.

In terms of drinks, take the number of non-drinkers and that's your very rough number of total soft drink litres. Divide that into cans or bottles. You may be able to do sale-or-return at places like Majestic (also handy for ice and ice bin hire) or get something that your family will use up.
Some are funny about branded soft drink, ditto about sugar free, but you know your guests.

For wine/prosecco, take the number of drinkers and calculate as follows:
Light drinkers 3 to a bottle
Average drinkers 2 to a bottle
Boozers a bottle each
So if your estimate is about 20 light drinkers, buy 7 bottles.

And consider buying some cordial/squash as back-up. Fizzy water/Sodastream is nice to have, but not essential.

You will survive. Promise.

we do something similar (church then a family gathering) and the following works really well.

Chilli in a slow cooker or cooked and then in a very low oven to keep warm (boil rice when you get back as no one will expect to eat straight away)
Chicken with some jars of sauce in one of those disposable roasting dishes in the oven for about a couple of hours on low heat (ready when you get back)
Salads work well
Be careful of bread and sandwiches as they can get a bit stale if left out.
Iceland/supermarket party bits seem like a good idea but in reality are a pain in the backside.
Cold meats etc work well too, you could roast a chicken the day before and carve it up.
Desserts - fruit salads, cheesecakes, buns

I love bbq. Just hate doing it myself because I burn or undercook. But we have crappy kit.

A group of teens on a BBQ sounds like a disaster waiting to happen, one person should really be manning it.

I think ice cream with a variety of toppings for your guests to DIY sounds perfect.

Flinders - thanks so much for all that useful drinks information . I'm going to the supermarket to buy all the store cupboard things and drinks , so that's perfect timing .

Do people really supervise teenagers while they BBQ? My kids BBQ all the time with ony minimal adult suspevision and they are 10,12 and 14. They set the fire and light it on their own. .

They all understand the basic laws of physics including the ways that heat is conducted and we have no accelerants or fireworks handy for them to throw on the flames .

I don't see how a BBQ is more dangerous than traffic, and most teenagers can cross the road on their own.

Glad you approve of the ice cream idea. I've already bought ice cream toppings - sauces and sweets - and there's plenty ice cream in freezer . This is my standard dessert for when the kids have lots of their friends round. None of this " whip up a quick and easy cake made with quinoa and grated vegetables " here .

< prepares to be thrown off MN>

Just reporting back to say that we had a lovely day and everyone commented on how nice the food was.

The weather was fab and the BBQ was a great success. Those of you who said that the adults would scoff the BBQ were absolutely right - 35 people consumed 61 burgers and 48 buns .

Teens loved the pizza ( done in oven )

I bought the brioche style burger rolls and everyone loved then .

The s'mores went down a treat , as did the ice cream and sauces / toppings.

I make a large platter of various cold meats and one of fish - mostly salmon and prawns . That was easy , looked lovely and was finished quickly .

I made 6 different salads ( including the pesto pasta someone mentioned uo thread - thanks for that. it was lovely ).

I bought 4 salads from M&S.

I made two puddings - fruit salad and chocolate cheesecake. Three guests also brought desserts so we had loads .

I managed to buy nearly everything from Lidl and aldi, which kept the costs down .

I was VERY lucky to find lovely burgers in M&S reduced to £1, so I only paid £16 for 64 burgers- a big saving . Although I spent some of it on lovely BBQ sauces and posy mayonnaise etc

Very little alcohol was consumed, perhaps 4-5 bottle of wine / cava. But there were lots of people driving - I'm sure it woudl have been a lot more if there were more adults and it was in the evening.

The only thing I woudl do differently next time was buy more coke / Pepsi and fewer other soft drinks.

And we needed more glasses. Although I had 50, everyone had a drink when they arrived and put their glass down , then needed another one later. I was endlessly loading and unloading the dishwasher and didn't have much time to eat or talk to people . Maybe next time I'll get some plastic ones .

So thank you everyone for your advice . I feel much more confident about doing it again .

Well done you. So pleased for you. Sounds like a great day