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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be a little bit terrified?

29 replies

TiredOfUsingTechnology · 19/08/2016 16:05

I'm booked in for a ELCS in a couple of weeks due to breech awkward baby and I'm totally freaking out.

I'd planned to have a water birth, been to hypnobirthing and pregnancy yoga and was really hoping for a natural birth. I know that these things don't always go to plan In fact I'm a bit of a fatalist so assumed that it wouldn't go to plan anyway but I can't help but feel disappointment about the natural birth I'll be missing.

I'm also completely terrified... I've never even had a filling or broken a bone so the thought of a medical procedure is really scaring me. I felt sick when the words catheter and cannula were mentioned! I'm also worried about breastfeeding as I know it can be harder after a section and I'm clinging on to that as it's the one part of the process I still feel a little bit in control of!

Sorry if this is waffling... Feel like a big mixed bag of emotions right now

OP posts:

monkeysox · 19/08/2016 16:10

it will be fine. They'll explain every step by step. Get a feeding pillow. All the best.

thewideeyedpea · 19/08/2016 16:12

Cliché I know but the most important thing is a healthy baby and a healthy you! Good luck with the CS and please don't worry about breastfeeding afterwards being difficult , after my 3rd section ds is still feeding at 20 months.

Saladfox · 19/08/2016 16:14

There are lots of threads in Childbirth explaining the exact procedure. I had an ELCS, and it was a surreal, but pretty pleasant, and entirely pain-free experience, with nice, cheerful, professional staff who talked me through everything as it happened and made sure I felt consulted re things like the catheter, which goes in when you are still entirely numbed - and was actually rather nice, as I'd been going to the loo about every ten minutes in late pregnancy!

I wasn't able to breastfeed, but my lack of supply mystified everyone, and no one made any specific link to the CS.

Good luck!

Lovelongweekends · 19/08/2016 16:16

I've had 2dc and two c-sections, the first emergency, the second elective. The elcs was actually quite an enjoyable experience, very relaxed, music playing, nurses/midwives chatting and joking with me in pre-op. Actually c-section straight forward, dd2 actually started rooting when they put her on my chest!
I bf-ed both of mine and it was fine - second the suggestion of a breastfeeding pillow though. Hope all goes ok for you.

Bagina · 19/08/2016 16:19

It's FINE!! It's even WONDERFUL!! You could be missing out on a horrendous 3 day labour and a fourth degree tear, but you will never know that, and always have the picture of the perfect birth in your head.

I had a bad 24 hours but after that recovery was onwards and upwards. Breastfeeding fine. Cannulas aren't great but you really can't feel them. I was the same as you! Catheter might sting a bit when they take it out, but it's great not having to get up to go to the loo! You can't really feel it. It's a bit crap having to stay in hospital for a few days but it goes quick. Many people who have vaginal births have to have all these interventions too. Just be glad that your vagina will still be in one piece!

ProfYaffle · 19/08/2016 16:22

I've had 2 c/s, 1st emergency, 2nd elective. I loved them! The elective was a very civilised way to give birth. I had no issues bfing either, bf both babies for over a year. I did get shown how to bf lying down which was very useful.

Mouikey · 19/08/2016 16:24

I had a c section booked but baby had other ideas. First thing is that every birth is natural - you're just getting a helping hand, don't see it as a cop out or something negative, it's not. Secondly, own the process, take control of the bits you can - use your hypnobirthing (I did mine on the assumption I would have a c section), pick your labour music out and buy some nice nightdresses for after. Thirdly, embrace the catheter - it is your friend!!! I dreaded having one when I had major stomach surgery, but in hindsight it was brilliant as I didn't need to get up to pee!!! Finally, remember that this is happening to ensure you and baby are safe and well - you will get skin to skin and will be able to BF - make use of the nurses and BF counsellors on the ward - without them I'd have given up.

And mostly congratulations, life will change and the love you will feel is unimaginable - I say that sat here with my 3 week old sat on my chest!!!

MrsD28 · 19/08/2016 16:33

I understand your feelings of disappointment - I was pretty devastated when I was told that I would have to be induced (and all my plans for birthing pool etc had to go out the window). I ended up having an emergency C section (which was also a huge and rather horrible shock) but am now happily breastfeeding a healthy three month old baby. The procedure itself is not too scary - the baby is out within the first ten or fifteen minutes, so for most of the operation you can be looking at or potentially even holding your new baby 😀

The first day or two afterwards is tough, no doubt. You will be absurdly grateful for the catheter, as it means you don't have to get up to go to the loo (and you won't be able to feel it). Sitting up and standing are a challenge at first, but within a few days you will be surprisingly mobile. And having a C section does not necessarily get in the way of successful breastfeeding - I have been exclusively breastfeeding since birth with no more issues (and sometimes fewer issues) than my "natural birth" friends.

So there is no need to panic. But don't feel bad about feeling bad! For the first few weeks, I would get really upset when I thought about how far-from-plan my birth experience was... but it soon fades, as you focus on life with your gorgeous new baby. Good luck!

Italiangreyhound · 19/08/2016 16:38

My adorable daughter was born by C-section and I breastfed. All was fine in the long run. It is what it is. Focus on holding your new baby for the first time.

Good luck

mumsneedwine · 19/08/2016 16:42

Best advice I was ever given. You get pregnant to have a baby, not to go through childbirth. It doesn't matter how the baby comes out as long as it's safe. Best wishes - babies are lovely however they arrive x

NoMoreStickers · 19/08/2016 17:17

I had an elective c and it was great! I'd never had an operation before and was terrified. Everyone was lovely, all calm, organised, told exactly what was happening, each baby lifted up and brought to me.... I was asked about every little thing, how high did I want the screen, would dad stay with babies or me etc. I'm a complete control freak and I had a lovely birth experience. I believe recovery is easier with elective c section compared to an emergency. I was trotting about by tea time. I hated the idea of the catheter but it was all very discreet. You'll be fine! Good luck xxxx

panegyricS1 · 19/08/2016 17:24

Mine were fine.

Two tips: tell a member of staff if you start to feel nauseous during the procedure, because the anaesthetist can give you something for that quickly. And you may feel hot, so get your OH to dab your forehead with a wet tissue.

Fortybingowings · 19/08/2016 17:25

Totally THE most civilised way to have a baby. Mine was mandated by a twin pregnancy wit one breech and one transverse, BUT I'd have chosen one for a single pregnancy too. I don't do 'natural' We have good drugs, and they work well. I was gone in under 48 hrs and walked out relatively pain free. Make sure they add some laxatives to your take home drugs though. Codeine is marvellous but bungs you up. You'll be fine 😀👍

Rhythmsticks · 19/08/2016 17:28

Our hospital offers vaginal breach deliveries, is that an option for you? My friend had her breech baby naturally and they were very hands off and encouraged her to be active and she had her ds squating on a birthing stool!

Original poster

TiredOfUsingTechnology · 19/08/2016 17:28

Thanks everyone for your responses. They are very reassuring and making me feel a bit better about the whole thing. I'm sure I will look back over what you have said over the next few weeks as it gets closer xx

OP posts:

VocalDuck · 19/08/2016 17:33

I had an EMCS and it was a really serene and calm experience despite the urgency of getting DD out. I recovered really well and quickly; far better and quicker than many in my antenatal group who gave birth vaginally.

Take a long charger lead into hospital so you can access the Internet and take photos without your phone running out and take it easy when you get up from sitting or standing because that is where it will hurt for the first couple of weeks.

DaphneCanDoBetterThanFred · 19/08/2016 17:45

I was scared before both my c sections but they really were much better than I expected. Didn't notice the canula either time, the first section I needed a catheter but they put it in while I couldn't feel anything, and when they took it out one midwife kind of gently dropped newborn DS on my stomach while the nurse yanked out the catheter. Sounds awful but I was so preoccupied with 'catching' DS that I didn't feel the catheter come out so it worked! I breastfed for 1 year + with each baby, and healed really well each time. Talking to friends who had vaginal births, it seems that both ways have their discomforts and issues, but I was really happy with mine in the end. Just take it really, really easy after the section. After my second they forced me up and into the shower within hours which felt awful BUT it did me a lot of good to be moving again. Don't lift anything heavy for weeks, and yyyyy to breastfeeding pillow. And finding a position where the newborn rascal doesn't dig his foot into the c section scar and try to eviscerate you

anyoldname76 · 19/08/2016 17:48

ive had 3 c sections, the 1st 2 were emergencies, the last one was planned. it was by far the most relaxed and the one i recovered the quickest from. just take your time after, rest up and you will recover fine.

ineedwine99 · 19/08/2016 17:51

I didn't have a c section but I did have a catheter and Canula and honestly it's fine.
Try not to stress. All the best

MistressPage · 19/08/2016 17:58

This exact same thing happened to me OP. I would say don't be scared but easier said than done and like you I was terrified. Just try to stay calm. I was so frightened walking into theatre, but everything was calm and painless and the staff so reassuring and lovely. Once you're in it it becomes less scary. Also, I did think afterward that I was glad stitches were in my abdomen and not my vajayjay!

MrsBobDylan · 19/08/2016 18:06

I've had 3 elective cs and bf fine with all three, no expressing or formula top ups needed. I googled pics of babies on the boob before dc1 so knew what I was aiming for visually. Once they latch on, if it's ridiculously painful then they've just got end of nipple. If it tugs and feels sore but subsides, baby's got a good latch.

Try to put the natural birth away in a box mentally and start to prepare for your cs. It will be an amazing experience.

Also, re catheters, I could never feel them going in and once had one done with no anaesthetic after an accident and it doesn't hurt at all.

You'll be great I promise!

MarcelineTheVampire · 19/08/2016 18:27

I had a ELCS and I was so disappointed that I couldn't have a natural birth, but I know I did what was the best for me and my baby.

It wasn't half as bad as I imagined- the worst part was the spinal block which hurt a little and my legs going numb freaked me out but the actual c-section was fine!! Everyone really takes care of you!!

Feel free to PM if you want any advice you'll be fine!!

MarcelineTheVampire · 19/08/2016 18:28

Oh and breastfeeding was fine- my milk came in after 3 days and has stayed plentiful until now, 8 months later!!!

DoveBlue · 19/08/2016 18:43

I had an emergency c-section and breastfed both babies. Ask for skin to skin as soon as possible.

I hate needles but I coped with epidural/spinal. I was terrified I would move but midwife was fantastic held my hands and talked me through everything so calmly. It is a strange feeling being awake in theatre but you have the baby so quickly and after that you don't care so much. I did feel quite sick at one point and cold afterwards.
One thing I would suggest is prime whoever is coming in with you and the anaesthatist (sp?) To talk to you all the time what's happening once baby out. I was given one baby very quickly but other baby took minute or two. No one was answering me when I was asking if baby was ok. My husband was up with them at incubater I thought something was wrong (later found out he was cutting cord - they were instructing him what to do). Apparently someone did answer me but I didn't register it (again I was exhausted by this point but worth making sure someone talks you through what's going on with baby). I got in quite a panic and when my husband came over with her I was crying! There are a lot of people in theatre so it can be a bit confusing. The staff were really lovely though.

Also be aware you will likely lose some feeling on your skin on your stomach around your scar - this really freaked me out. It gets less over time (mines not all come back yet 1 yr later). I recovered really well (it was easier than walking round with twins inside me!). I also had a hard breastfeeding pillow that sat off my stomach (harmony duo) it is for twins but could use for one baby but they may do similar for single baby. (Or buy a twin one and use other side as table for book, tv remote, water bottle and phone (for MNing))

Good luck OP. Try not to think too much about it (v.hard) but fear is way worse than reality. Realise I've just written a bloody essay hopefully some bits useful

scarednoob · 19/08/2016 18:48

I was dreading a c section but ended up needing one. It was absolutely fine and very easy recovery. If we have another, I'd do it again without hesitation.

Lots of luck OP - in the scheme of having a baby, how you actually have him/her is such a tiny thing :)

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