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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go to work tomorrow?

37 replies

SealOnASofa · 17/08/2016 18:18

Kids are getting exam results tomorrow. Predicted to do really well, all straightforward. DH is trying to make me feel guilty for going to work on such an important day, says I should call in sick 'just in case'. AIBU to go in anyway?

OP posts:
Blistory · 17/08/2016 18:20

Not unreasonable to go in. Your DH is unreasonable in expecting you to call in sick when you're not.

Is he taking the day off ?

honeylulu · 17/08/2016 18:21

Is he taking the day off since he thinks it's such a good idea?

Original poster
SealOnASofa · 17/08/2016 18:23

Yes he is Confused

OP posts:
Magazinepile · 17/08/2016 18:25

That's a hard one, can you just go home at lunchtime? X

BikeRunSki · 17/08/2016 18:26

Well then he'll be able to deal with emotions, alternatives and practicalities whichever way the results go.

SquidgyRedBall · 17/08/2016 18:26

My parents were on holiday when my results came through. When she got back I said 'shit mum, didn't get the results I needed but it's ok I've arranged to go to Staffordshire now' 'ok' she says.

RosieandJim89 · 17/08/2016 18:28

I would maybe see if i could go in a bit later and take them to get their results, maybe take them out for tea after work.
I probably would have arranged to be off work as my parents worked when I got my GCSE's and were on holiday when I got my alevels and it was quite an anti-climax having no one to share my achievements.

HobnailsandTaffeta · 17/08/2016 18:29

First person I told my results was my sisters PA, huge family and every bugger was abroad other than my sister who was in a meeting.

Really not an issue.

Sparklesilverglitter · 17/08/2016 18:31

Maybe you could go out for dinner or get a take away tomorrow if they do well as expected?

Not unreasonable to go in to work tomorrow they will have Dad with them so won't be alone if they don't get predicted grades

converseandjeans · 17/08/2016 18:35

I don't really see why you both need to be on hand - so if he is off work then you should be able to go in.

SapphireStrange · 17/08/2016 18:36

God, this never occurred to me when I was that age. But my parents were the kind who would never have a day off unless a limb was hanging off or something.

justneedsomehandholding · 17/08/2016 18:38

I don't know why you both have to be there. DS was on a school trip abroad and the teachers handled it. Just got a text. DD I took the day off. She literally shook as she opened the envelope.

Original poster
SealOnASofa · 17/08/2016 18:39

That's how I was brought up too, Sapphire - and that's why I'm asking. DH had a very different upbringing and thinks I'm heartless and uncaring.

OP posts:
SapphireStrange · 17/08/2016 18:41

Well, if it helps at all I really don't think you are!

TaterTots · 17/08/2016 18:42

If he's off anyway there's no real need for you to be. If he'd said a month ago 'Let's both book a day's holiday' that's one thing - guilting you into pulling a sickie is another.

Muskateersmummy · 17/08/2016 18:42

My DM and DF were both at work when I go my results. They weren't what I needed, I popped into mums work and we sorted it out together there. Wouldn't have occurred to me that she should take the day off. I certainly don't think it warrents both of you being at home

Queenbean · 17/08/2016 18:43

God do people really worry about the emotional impact of a child for not having both their parents there on results day?

My parents were both at work on results day and I can report no adverse effects.

Won't she be off getting shitfaced anyway instead of hanging out with the olds?

Blistory · 17/08/2016 18:44

But he's happy for you to lie to your employer ? What does he think the two of you would be doing for the rest of the day once the results are known ?

Presumably he considers himself a competent and caring parent perfectly capable of providing congratulations or commiserations to your children ?

TheCrowFromBelow · 17/08/2016 18:44

YWBVU to phone in sick, because you aren't!
YWNBU to book a day off if you felt the DC need emotional support, but your DH is there so they have that.
So YANBU to go to work.

SapphireStrange · 17/08/2016 18:45

But he's happy for you to lie to your employer?

Good point! Is that a great example for your kids?

mum11970 · 17/08/2016 18:45

If your kids are applied to go to uni you can find out online after midnight tonight if they have been accepted. This should give you an idea on their results.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 17/08/2016 18:46

He's at home, no reason to have both Parents there.

For what it's worth , last year me and dh were at hospital waiting for dh to undergo a procedure, ds2 phoned us and told us his results after accessing UCAS iirc , he'd have been mortified if we'd said we were staying at home.

mum11970 · 17/08/2016 18:46

Have, not are. Sorry.

myownprivateidaho · 17/08/2016 18:53

I can understand that it would be good for one parent to be there to take them in and be there in case something goes wrong. I don't think it takes two. And not really ok to call in sick over it in any case.

e1y1 · 17/08/2016 18:54

Call in sick when you're not?

Where do you work? I want to go. My place you can't call in sick when you're sick Grin.

It would be nice for you to have the day off, but not essential, the results won't have changed by the time you have finished work.

Can you get a leave day, or a swap day.