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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be gutted my attempt to make memories with kids failed!!

150 replies

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 12/08/2016 00:18

I was looking forward to waking the children at midnight to watch the shooting stars tonight. What a lovely memory it would be for them. DD (9) grunted at me, went for a wee and then decided it was too cold to sit outside (snuggled in her onesie and blanket while sipping hot chocolate). DS (11) refused to wake up even enough to acknowledge me and DH has an important meeting tomorrow so couldn't stay up late.

So, I was sat in the garden on my own with a glass of wine. Saw one shooting star....and then there was a squeal from the deflated paddling pool. A frog. Being chased by the neighbours cat. So I had to rescue the frog. The security light kept going off after as the cats kept running across my lawn in search of the damn frog which meant I couldn't see stars anyway.

AIBU to suspect all the wonderful twee family moments are all fiction??

OP posts:
RainIsAGoodThing · 12/08/2016 00:19

Oh bless you. You definitely tried!

If it's any consolation, my favourite memories with my mum and dad are ones they probably don't even remember. Just they everyday moments where i realised how much I was loved.

flibbidygibbet · 12/08/2016 00:20

Yabu to use the term 'making memories '

VioletBam · 12/08/2016 00:20

Yabu.

Who wakes the children at midnight to do that!

I think it was a bit of an odd thing to do really.

Zucker · 12/08/2016 00:23

YANBU most of the memories we have are random stuff a person couldn't plan. I gave up trying to "make memories" a couple of Christmas' ago when I decided we should all put up the Christmas tree. Christmas tunes, food and drinks to get the spirit going ended in disaster. Plus the tree looked like shite as no one cared after a few good rows Grin Never again!

AnotherUsernameBitesTheDust · 12/08/2016 00:26

I was feeling sad that all my children were asleep and missing out. Then I checked my "on this day" on Facebook and we'd watched them last year, so I've made that memory with them and will remind them in the morning!

NorksAkimbo72 · 12/08/2016 00:27

Yanbu and you sound lovely!
Planning for memories always seems to backfire for me, too. The memories my DC's tend to be most fond of were silly, unplanned moments in the day to day.

littleshirleybeans · 12/08/2016 00:28

That's the sort of thing I'd do. I saw a great shooting star the other night, travelled right across the sky. Been too cloudy and rainy since then.
I've jumped into the car with my two ds and drove around trying to see the space station. Mine love that kind of thing and I think they'd have been up for stargazing with blankets etc. YANBU.

ArmySal · 12/08/2016 00:28

YANBU.

Nothing wrong with making memories. Use whatever term you like.

ifcatscouldtalk · 12/08/2016 00:28

If it's any consolation the year of the eclipse I was still fairly young and was so excited. My parents and siblings not interested in the slightest. Stood in the garden on my own to see it go slightly overcast!

Original poster
sparepantsandtoothbrush · 12/08/2016 00:30

littleshirleybeans I've driven around following hot air balloons before but they never land near us like they did when I was younger! Maybe I'm just trying to relive my childhood Grin

OP posts:
GinBunny · 12/08/2016 00:44

It's a lovely idea OP, have been out tonight watching them and they are very bright. Perhaps tomorrow you could try again?

Bragadocia · 12/08/2016 00:45

Your thread reminded me to go outside and look, the upshot of which is that DH, at the age of 46, has seen his first ever shooting star! So thanks to you, a middle aged man has now a nice adulthood memory.

TheWindInThePillows · 12/08/2016 00:46

The Perseids is a big astronomical event, for those saying why wake them up- between 150-200 shooting stars per hour so lots more chance to see them than ordinarily. Although my own personal shooting star count tonight was 2 in 20 min, so it wasn't overwhelming. Still worth it though!

blackheartsgirl · 12/08/2016 01:13

It's the random spur of the moment shit that kids remember the best. I have told this on mumsnet before but a few years ago when my son was 12 and our relationship was at its worst..I was considering putting him into care for respite as his behaviour was so terrible..anyway we had a major snow fall at about 1am in the morning and as we lived on a hill and all the girls were sleeping..Ds asked if we could just sled down the hill and that's what we both did. We both grabbed a sled each and spent a happy hour whizzing down our very steep and silent Hill. He still talks about that night and says he'll never forget it and I won't either.

brambly · 12/08/2016 01:14

YANBU and my heart broke a little for you at the image of you in the garden but... but... I have to be honest, if my mum woke me up for that as a kid of anywhere between 9 and about 14, I wouldn't have given a fuck and would have growled at her and rolled back off to sleep.

Wrong audience, I think. I'd have been excited at 5, and probably again by 18 or 19. 11 especially is right at the apex of the awkward bastard stage.

brambly · 12/08/2016 01:15

No that's a lie, 15 is the apex.

At 15 I'm ashamed to say I'd probably have told my lovely mum to piss off.

LucyBabs · 12/08/2016 01:19

I give up with trying to make memories.. My almost 8 yr old dd had a ten minute conversation with me tonight about all the times when has vomited Hmm
She had a very fond memory of her Daddy pushing her head down the toilet bowl as she threw up.
Never mind all the days out.. the snuggles on the sofa..the family occasions..births and deaths.
Fuck Grin

Original poster
sparepantsandtoothbrush · 12/08/2016 01:21

Lol brambly it's ok. I'm not heartbroken but I guarantee they won't remember I tried to wake them and will say they would have got up if I'd tried. Maybe tomorrow night will be more successful as per ginbunny's suggestion.

blackheartsgirl that's such a lovely story! I hope things worked out ok xx

OP posts:
Original poster
sparepantsandtoothbrush · 12/08/2016 01:22

lucybabs both DC remember DD being sick at her birthday party (aged 5) and DS remembers not being able to go on cub camp because of an eye infection!

OP posts:
LizKeen · 12/08/2016 01:23

DH and I stood out for 10 mins and saw maybe 8. Wonderful.

It is something DD1 would love to do. But she would have to be forewarned as she doesn't like surprises, and even then its a lottery if she would wake up in the right mood. :o

I try to do these sorts of things. Might give up though. DD1 was talking fondly about the time she was eating a pot noodle in our previous house. A pot noodle ffs. All the shit I have done and she fondly remembers a pot noodle.

In my book it was probably a shit parenting day never to be thought of again. Not fond memory material.

MrsDrSpencerReid · 12/08/2016 03:14

My DD (9) would have made me promise to wake her up, then refused to get out of bed when I did, then in the morning would have been outraged that she missed it and why didn't I wake her up?! Grin

MadamDeathstare · 12/08/2016 03:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Thethingswedoforlove · 12/08/2016 03:33

I asked my dds id they would like to be woken up to go and see some. So I don't think you are bonkers. I have just got back now and we sAw 10-15 shooting stars in 30 mins. I wish I had thought of a blanket and hot choc as we all got a bit cold despite wearing coats! I love star gazing and was delighted when my dds 9 and 11 were keen to join in. Now we all have to try to get back to sleep!!

CandODad · 12/08/2016 04:17

I think Billy Connolly tells it best when he talks about how he and his wife took the children around America in a mobile home. They even set up a dragons nest one day for them to come along and stuff like that. Heading home he asks "What have you enjoyed about the holiday?" They huddle together, discuss their ideas and then reply "Barney". One of the DVD's they had watched one night while they were driving somewhere.

Out2pasture · 12/08/2016 04:21

the meteor shower goes on for a few more days, I believe off hand until the 23 at least so maybe try again?