To let my son drive where he likes?

[willowtreecottage]

A bit of a moot point now,as he has been doing it for ages, however...
As soon as he passed his driving test(17),he went everywhere. I'm talking 300 miles from our home on one of his first trips.
Then again the next weekend.
I wasn't particularly pleased, but DH reassured me that he did similar ( from US and at a younger age)
Well, the amount of patents telling me we should have stopped him has been extraordinary! Apparently not till he was 21... "he'd need a good few years driving before l'd let him" blah blah...
Is this a thing?
Do/did you restrict where your teens go at the beginning? DS claims l am too " over protective, and most of his friends parents dont care"and l like to use this as an example of my laid back nature. not true

Good for him. I know quite a few people, who despite having passed their tests years ago, don't drive on motorways and / or don't like driving on non familiar routes.

Ds1 passed at 16 1/2 (non Uk). At that point , we'd already made him practice loads on the freeway. It's terrifying to teach but it's good for them. I had no qualms at all (except for normal
maternal fears of teens driving) in letting him go off once he's passed his test.

I do really like that our state restricts the amount of passengers under 21 and you have to be off the road by 9 in the early days, unless you're coming home from work or a school activity.

When I was in 6th form, it was tradition to drive to Weston Super Mare (from the far side of Bristol) on the day you passed your test. We always took the same route - M32/M4/M5 there and A370 back.

I think because I knew I had that rite of passage to come, driving on the motorway was never a big deal. Within a month I became the default long-distance driver going to London, Swansea and Blackpool before the summer was over!

So I guess what I'm trying to say is, driving long distances helped build my confidence a lot, as well as preparing me for adult life!

I find the whole "I wouldn't let him..." train of thought very weird. DS1, also 17, is sitting his driving test soon. He'll be paying for his insurance and the running costs of the car (a wee car that his grandmother is buying him) so what right would I have to stop him doing anything?

It's weird that often the people who say I shouldn't allow my teen to do something are the same ones who moan about children of 10/11/12 being too babied now with lifts to school and never away from screens.

Of course it's ok and beneficial too for them to become confident drivers. I'd be appalled if DS turned out to be one of those namby pamby drivers who can't ever go on the motorway or anywhere new.

lala if the teenager is self-funding that you can only advise but as I pay for DS's car expenses I do feel entitled to say how many passengers he can carry particularly as this is backed by research. His godfather's brother lost 2 children and 2 other teenagers were killed when the inexperienced driver crashed.

"Research shows that peer pressure can encourage bad driving and result in drivers ‘showing off’ to their passengers and taking more risks. 16-17 year-old drivers are up to four times more likely to die in a crash when carrying young passengers than when driving alone, but 62% less likely when carrying older adult passengers, indicating it is peer pressure rather than simply the presence of passengers that raises the risk [26]. Young passengers can also cause distraction: teenage drivers are six times more likely to have a serious incident when there is loud conversation in the vehicle "

www.brake.org.uk/too-young-to-die/15-facts-a-resources/facts/488-young-drivers-the-hard-facts

I'm glad l kept my mouth kind of shut!

As soon as I got home from passing my test my mum handed me the car keys and sent me off to work! 3 weeks later I drove over 300 miles for a weekend away with a friend. I am so glad my parents let me do that as I have driven all over the country and actually drove for a job too.
I have friends who twenty years on won't drive more than 50 miles away or on the motorway as they have no confidence at all.

I drove to the Lake District in snow! My mother had a fit saying that I shouldn't drive in snow and I remember walking out of the door saying "But I have to learn to drive in it and how else will I learn otherwise?" I drove along mountain roads with snow higher than the roof of the car! I came back in one piece having had a whale of a time!

How does driving long distances affect their insurance? I guess that they are still not going to rack up 20-30k miles unless they are doing it every other weekend.

And I don't trust quotes from Brake. They call themselves a road safety charity and when you ask them their view on something (properly organised motorsport for the over 8's) they suddenly get all up themselves and won't discuss it. They are all a bit "who'll think of the children" about it

Dd was driving to work and college (40 odd miles away) by 18 every day why pass a test and curb their driving? Saying that her boyfriend at the time wasnt allowed to drive after dark

When the children get killed, they've got a point - young drivers are a high risk group. (I am connected to a case similar to that mentioned by moles, it may be the same : two siblings killed, family destroyed)

Doesn't mean they shouldnt drive - but like anyone else, phones off , no dicking about , no aggression , etc etc.

Mileage is relevant as some policies limit it.

Isn't the point of passing your driving test, so that you can drive to the places you want to go?

Specialsubject. It may be true that they are a higher risk group but you also have to look at the other side of the coin - the more they drive the more experience they get and the better driver they will become. These are the points that are missed by charities that are really action groups.

I understand the need of those that have lost loved ones to try and improve things, but can they truly look at things subjectively when they have lost so much? Will their focus solely be on the side of the the stats on accidents alone?

It's taking distracting passengers and driving when already tired (late at night being designated driver to drive drunk mates home at 3am after being sober in a club) that I'll be worrying about I think. We're not there yet, but living rurally teens driving is a worry looming.

I'd rather my kids was driving her/ himself than potentially being driven by a mate who may have had a drink and insisted they were still OK, and I'd rather my kid was driving 300 miles in daylight with rest stops than driving a car load of drunk teens 20 miles home at 3am...

All for people driving to get experience. But kids think they are invincible and so the message.needs to be hammered home. Dicking about in cars can kill.

Phone off, belt on and passengers know when to stop jabbering.

Exactly Special. Education rather than stopping them gaining the experience they really need st that age.

moles there's a big difference, imo, in suggesting or telling a teen they should limit passengers until they are more experienced and "not letting" them drive longer distances. That's a whole other issue. And that's an issue that entirely depends on the teen and their friends and how reliable they are to be sensible in the car.

I did a 30 minute motorway commute to uni from day one. I drove 60 miles each weekend to stay with now DH within 6 weeks of passing my test. I did two 4-5 hour journeys to see friends the summer I passed.

I would a hypocrit to restrict mine.

When DD first passed her test I told her that new drivers weren't allowed to drive on the interstate - and she believed me until one of her friends clued her in.