If i wanted to drink out of a fucking jam jar

[JackandDiane]

I would stand by my recycling bin
Please use glasses

I blame Jamie Oliver. Never seen him use a plate. Just a chopping board with a stabby knife.

What next - toddler potties? (At least they have rims to prevent the sauce sadly dribbling all over the sides.)

Or we could go the other way, Rubbish and start getting toddlers to shit on slates and chopping boards?

*...however I do use my empty Cocio bottles as vases. Cos they're pretty and retro looking.

To quote the wonderful John Finnemore:

"I don't want it in teacup if it's not a cup of tea,
I don't want it in a jam jar, 'cause I'm not a sodding bee!"

(From the song 'Put It On A Plate)

I'm just back from a holiday in Germany, and they really, really take their glasses seriously - no messing about with jam jars or anything else 'amusing'! Our flat was fully equipped with glasses for schnapps, wine, small water, large water, glass beer mugs, and tall beer glasses. Any drink in a cafe comes in exactly the right glass as well. Every variation of beer has it's own type of glass, and even soft drinks often come in a specific glass. I truly hate the slate / chopping board thing! How do you clean those things properly, never mind eat off them!

Noonesfool thank you so much for introducing me to #wewantplates via this thread. It's hilarious and I have found kindred spirits.

This really made me laugh. It's the stylish way the poster wrote his tweet to @wewantplates. Brilliant.

twitter.com/rocketandsquash/status/710513555246850048

I was discussing the vegan options with a waitress and realised the couple at the next table were eating their bloody, as in rare, steak off chopping boards. When I ordered my food, I asked for it to be served on a plate. The waitress tried to tell me his they only serve on chopping boards. I asked how the boards were cleaned. They could only be wiped as the wood will swell and crack if washed. "So you're going to serve me VEGAN food off a board that has meat cut on it?" I got my plate and I could see the chef, oh so trendy kitchen, and he didn't appear to have an issue with it. I often wonder how chefs feel about serving food on this crap.

Here is the whole song by John Finnemore, who I believe speaks for many of us on this thread:

Put It On A Plate

When I come to your restaurant, I do not ask for much
I don’t care if the food is late and chilly to the touch
Serve it tough or serve it raw, and I won’t really mind
There’s just one thing I ask of you if you would be so kind

Please won’t you
Put it on a plate
Put it on a plate
For Pete’s sake
Put it on a plate

I don’t want it on breadboard, though I know that’s all the rage
I don’t need my chips imprisoned in a little silver cage
I don’t want it in a mess tin I don’t want it in a crate
It’s a pork and onion pasty, please just put it on a plate

A plate is flat and circular, a plate has got a brim
It curves up at the edges, which helps keep the gravy in
The Chinese first came up with them 3000 years ago
If they think up something better I’ll be sure to let you know

Meanwhile
Put it on a plate
Put it on a plate
For Pete’s sake
Put it on a plate

I don’t want a cup of carrots, I don’t want a pint of peas
I don’t want a vintage bed pan full of macaroni ‘n’ cheese
I don’t want it on a roof tile I don’t want it on a slate
It’s a pecan pie and custard, please just put it on a plate

It may not be original, but I don’t really care
I don’t need my mind blown by the sodding tableware
And should I have a drink with it as you may well have guessed
I have in that regard a not dissimilar request

Won’t you just
Give it in a glass
Give it in a glass
For God’s sake
Give it in a glass

I don’t want it in a tea cup if it’s not a cup of tea
I don’t want it in a jam jar 'cause I’m not a sodding bee
I don’t want it in a test-tube, I don’t want it in a flask
It’s a sodding Gin and Tonic please just give it in a glass

Put it on a plate
Give it in a glass
Plate, glass, plate, glass
Plate, plate, plate, plate, glass

Drinks belong in glasses, food goes on a plate
It’s the breadboards and the beakers that have brought me to this state
When I’m in a cell that’s padded and a jacket that is straight
and they bring me bread and water please just

Put. It. On. A .Plate

You're welcome, ZBWRDSM

Noonesfool Much more drippiness than gravy. And what about the trend for smearing purees onto serving presentation? Sometimes they use a paint brush, to get the correct amount of smear. WHY?

Actually, could work well in a toddler-using-chopping-board-as-toilet scenario.

Good grief ZB, it reminds me of childhood picnics. Everything in separate containers and all the faffing around to get it on the plate.

I agree op.
Went to a restaurant a while back that was advertising it's "Hot Slate Steaks". Basically you got served a slab of raw meat on a very hot slate and you had to cook it yourself.
DH and I agreed that if we were having to do the chefing ourselves then we wanted to pay less than for a properly cooked steak. They were the same price. We both decided that the professionally trained chef in the kitchen would do a better job. Also it came on a proper plate with that option.
Recently I went to a burger restaurant (not fast food) and to my utter shock I was presented with a burger that was possible to eat by just picking it up and eating it like you're supposed to. I almost cried with relief! I truly resent being presented with a massive stack that you have to take a knife and fork to.

Mason jar penis beakers will be all the the rage soon.

I've been served chips in the little pails or fryer baskets quite a lot recently.

In all but one of them they line them with paper - which conveniently means that they have only enough space to put half the portion of chips in that they could have done...

Funny that!

Doesn't bother me personally as I never usually manage to finish all my chips and dh gets them. But it means he loses out twice - not enough in his own portion and no top ups from me either!

YANBU hate the blumin things

Also being served a bottle of wine with tumblers....... excuse me but I want a wine glass!

Don't get me started on the slate/wood thing

user the wheelbarrow

I was served cocktails in a china teapot with a little china cup.

And bloody Great British menu/banquet - where the guests are served their food, from Seagulls, who are trained to deliver the food into a giant, space-age looking egg, that looks like one of those 1960s TVs. Then have to work out what is actually edible soil or actual soil. (I may have exaggerated ever so slightly).

Thank you. I also don't want herbs in my drinks.

YANBU - drinking from a jam jar dribbles! (assume why glasses have smooth rims..) [runs]

Yanbu.

Also visited a highly rated trendy care with NO TRAYS.
Guy looked at me really haughtily when I asked for one (like the madwoman I am..)

RubbishMantra be careful what you wish for en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Modern_Toilet_Restaurant

I live in Sweden and in a hip restaurant, a pudding was listed as chocolate mouse served in a MARROW BONE . Thinking it had got lost in translation I queried it. No - it was correct, a chocolate mouse served in a marrow bone. The waiter then went on to assure me it had been throughly cleaned first

I like some 'theatre/twattishness/twee' stuff when I go out to eat but it has gone too far, luckily I live rural Northern so your lucky if it comes in owt different to a metal dish
we had the boards where I worked and if you dont wash over 75 degrees it doesnt remove trace allergens so quite manky and dangerous, but the boards just got wiped - bleurggh

Cafe not care. I am getting fed up of my self determining keyboard too..