Two men and a baby - to be surprised at the reactions!

[LikeDylanInTheMovies]

I'm a gentleman Mumsnetter and at the weekend a male friend of mine takes his six month old for a walk and often stops at a coffee shop near where we live. Quite often I will meet him for a coffee and then continue on the walk with him.

It seems the sight of two men with a baby walking down the street is enough to cause consternation - plenty of double takes.a and we live in a largish city albeit where i live is a traditional working class area)

I'm not sure if they assume we are a couple and they don't like the fact that -shock horror - same sex couples can raise children, they think we are child abductors who've just snatched the child and wheeling it away or they are so unaccustomed to men performing childcare for very young infants?

Either way it didn't enter my head that we'd be subject to double takes and semi-suspicious glances.

Yesterday we went out for a family walk and my oldest child said to his dad look at you acting like a girl, I asked him why he said that and he said because he's pushing the pram with a baby! I was really shocked at his opinion I didn't realise he was already gender sterotyping.
Have now had a chat about gender equality

GMN, round these parts you would probably be given an award or something.

I grew up in the era of that Athena poster and I'm sure it's conditioned me to get a flutter in my nethers whenever I see a man with a tiny baby . Odd, because I don't have a single maternal bone in my body .

MrsSmith I can assure you neither of us are Athena-poster esque hunks!

I'd assume one was the dad and the other his mate or brother.

But the area I live in is a very liberal middle class Guardian readers area where Dads do their share of the parenting.

I find that very odd, Dylan - although I'm not saying I don't believe you at all.

If I saw 2 men with a pram, I wouldn't blink. I might think 'aww' - cos we're sort of conditioned to gush a bit at men caring for babies and I would assume that either 2 mates, 2 brothers, or same sex couple were taking their baby for a walk, and wouldn't bat an eyelid.

I guess some people do have bigoted old-fashioned attitudes, but I'm of the generation who in the 90's watched Joey and Chandler taking Ross's baby out, and leaving him on the bus I would've hoped society was a bit more accepting tbh.

The only time I've actively noticed two men with kids is when they hurled abuse at me for not stopping at the crossing (they were stood about 20ft away chatting with their backs to the road... did not look like they had any intention of crossing!!!) But as a general rule it's not something that massively stands out, who is pushing a pram/carrying a baby/ playing with a child

I did notice two dads out with older babies yesterday - not in a double-take, are they gay/superdads/child snatchers way - just thought it was nice they were having a day out with daddy, because it is unusual where I live.

But the area I live in is a very liberal middle class Guardian readers area where Dads do their share of the parenting

That may well be a factor. Where I live it used to have heavy industry and the accompanying gendered division of labour. While the industry has long gone, the gender divide in parenting seems to have survived it.

gay/superdads/child snatchers way

Nor do I think we (certainly not me anyway) are doing anything particularly praiseworthy, it is an excuse to see my friend, interact with the baby and get some fresh air and caffeine. I'd be almost as mortified by the idea that we were doing something praiseworthy, than the idea we were would be kiddy snatchers. The gay thing doesn't bother me at all, although I like to think I could do a lot better than that scruffy Herbert in the partner stakes.

Hold hands next time

Trump

Not until he moistures and gets a manicure.