About DH and his female friends

[CuddlyCat23]

I've NC'd for this.

Over the last couple of years DH has made friends with a small group of women, which came about through his previous job.

I have since discovered that he has recently lied to me about going to an event with a group of them (said he was going to meet someone else) and also that he has lied when one of them was texting him on a couple of occasions, when I had merely asked who it was.

DH thinks I'm U and cannot see why I have a problem about having these female friends. He says that sometimes he tells little white lies about it because he knows I will get the ump.

He does have some another group of female friends from the past, but they are all off getting married themselves now and, having seen their interactions with him, I know they were and are purely platonic.

I think I know he hasn't 'done' anything as such, but feel that most women would be rightly uncomfortable about this situation (?)

This is all after a recent bust up when I found out he'd been watching a lot of porn and lying about it, which really hurt me because I was (and still am) having self-esteem issues.

Not sure if I'm just going crazy?!

Its not like he's getting bombarded with messages though

While I also hate lying I can understand why he's doing it if you 'get the hump' about his female friends. You need to break this cycle if you don't give him grief about them then he would have no need to lie.

I'm sorry but I disagree. I don't think it is acceptable to lie ever. Regardless of if OP 'got the hump' previously. Lying just justifies her getting the hump imo

If I had to lie to my wife to avoid her getting the hump then it'd be a huge red flag.

I would also find the lying more upsetting rather than the female friends per se. I generally don't believe that people tend to lie when there is nothing to hide.

Nothing wrong with having friends of the opposite sex - both DP and I have plenty.

The issue is the lying. That suggests there's more to it.