Is it normal now to behave in the cinema exactly as you would when watching a film at home?

[tulippa]

Went to watch Finding Dory with the DCs today. The parts of the film I could concentrate on were great but the whole thing was spoilt by the amount of people having constant full volume conversations.

I didn't feel I could say anything as it would have meant asking the people both sides of us and behind us to be quiet. Also because the adults were joining in the conversations I would be directly challenging their parenting/child caring methods iyswim. The fact that so many groups were doing it had me doubting myself as well.

I don't mind laughing, children getting generally excited about the experience or whispered conversations at all. When did constant loud questions/answers/comments/getting in and out of your seat become such a normal thing to do at the cinema?

AIBU to stop going to the pictures at all if it just means having to listen to other people's conversations and not being able to concentrate on the film? It seems to happen more when it's busy - we had this problem at Star Wars as well.

BillSykesDog Yes good idea. I also remember making a conscious decision when the DCs were younger about whether they were ready to start going to the cinema. Eg: can they sit still for 2 hours? Can they understand it is important not to talk loudly and if you talk quietly it needs to be about something important? Will they be able to understand the film without having everything explained to them? Otherwise it's not fair on them either.

Our local autism friendly screenings appear to have become the place to take your toddler and let them do what they want. Running around shouting and climbing over seats happens all the time. Everyone I know who has autism or a child with autism has stopped going.

We went to see Spectre at our local screening room - it was darned expensive but far more civilised in that anyone who had food had it on plates not in rustly bags and there was no overwhelming nacho stench. Also, they don't serve during the film and people don't pay £20 a ticket and then talk through it. Great for films you really want to see. But I refuse to go to the normal cinema anymore for all the reasons everyone else has said. There were always ushers in the cinemas when i was a teenager, and you didn't mess about. There was a lot to be said for them!

Even at parent and child screenings there is a real lack of discipline. How are children suppose to learn that they are suppose to watch a film quietly if parents don't even attempt to teach them and let them run around!

Conversely we went to the cinema the other day and a woman turned around and hissed at my son to stop kicking her chair.

Now i would have apologised had my son done it but he was sat cross legged ( shoes off - he has sensory issues ) and was being good! Considering he has ADHD and often struggles i was really proud of how he'd coped. However I'd ensured I'd waited til my partner could come (and of course this cost more) so if he hadn't we could have stepped out for a bit and his four year old sister stay watching.

In fact my daughter saw her first film at just over age 2. She wasnt disruption.

Bar additional needs i think alot of it is just down to lack of role modelling and boundaries. Of course my children can be horrids but they know the consquences and expectations of behaviour and generally confirm when needed.

I've experienced the same at Theatre shows too.
Having a bag of sweets and drink is fairly normal but last time I went a family (mostly adults) were having a full on picnic, on the front row, I'm sure the performers were thrilled.

People who object really need to make a practice of asking the manager to do something about it, and demanding a refund if they don't. Cinemas really need to be incentivised to deal with this for their own sakes, as so many people are giving up on going to the cinema.

Why not complain to the ticket collector/ manager? They soon send disruptive patrons on their way. Or demand a refund for the film you didn't get to watch?

I think people are too used to putting up with it and don't complain enough!

I know what you mean. It's a shame and probably down to the fact there is no staff supervision, unlike the old days when ushers would stay in the auditorium and turf out nuisances. I did leave a film once due to noise and a bunch of lads throwing popcorn. I complain in the foyer and did get a full refund.

*complained

I used to work at Vue, we had to check in the screens but weren't allowed to stand in there for extended periods unless there are reports of bad behaviour. If you report people behaving badly a staff member should come and stand in with you for a while and then continue to make regular checks until the end of the film (or until the badly behaved person/group is asked to leave)

Staff might not seem to monitor the screenings but they do, we are told to keep out of sight and be silent so you might not notice. The cinema I worked in were very on top of people being obnoxious but it was easier then, it was before smart phones so people weren't as constantly attached to their phone as they are now.

Hearing about all this bad behaviour in Finding Dory particularly is pissing me off. My son is desperate to see it but he is autistic, he is well behaved and will sit still for the entire film but there is huge potential for him to distract other customers (mainly by saying 'blue tang' every time Dory is on screen). For that reason I have searched for an autism special showing. The only ones available are a cinema a significant distance from us and there are only two so we don't get a choice of time. I hate that I have to go out my way to make sure he can be at a separate showing so he isn't bothering anyone when I could have just gone to the local cinema if everyone is talking etc.

YANBU. The last time I went to the cinema, the guy I was sitting next to chewed his fingers the whole way through. I just could watch the film whilst he was gnawing on his thumb, it was just disgusting. I had to ask him to stop as it was putting me off watching.

We bought a projector and screen and now watch movies at home. Much more civilised and much cheaper in the long run!!

Yes cinema's have gone downhill in the last couple of years.

he is well behaved and will sit still for the entire film but there is huge potential for him to distract other customers (mainly by saying 'blue tang' every time Dory is on screen).

I wouldn't mind that at all because I would see that as your DS enjoying the film and getting excited about it which is lovely actually. It's completely different to a full on unnecessary conversation.

There is a lovely independent cinema near me, fat comfy seats, little tables where you can place a glass of wine or beer, space between rows so you don't have to stand to let people past, great screen and sound, only costs a quid more then the odeon down the road but without the antisocial phone using loud gossiping thunder cunts who feel it's their human right to ruin a film. No brainer really.

I went to the cinema today with DD to watch The BFG. Obviously packed and lots of young children.
Lots of trips to the loo but that was fine and I was very impressed that most of the adults with very young children were telling them to shhhh.

One family to the right of us made a fair amount of noise all the way through because they had a very little one with them but they were clearly making an effort to be as quiet as possible but when the film finished and they left ........ OMG to the carnage they'd left behind!!! Popcorn, food and containers all over the floor!!!!
Do these people do that at home???
They could have at least tried to bloody tidy up! Dreadful behaviour

YNBU. I expect a bit of noise with kids films because, well they're kids at the end of the day and still learning. I took the DCs to see Snoopy at Christmas and practically every single person in that cinema was as quite as a mouse, adult and child!

Best one I can recall is going to see Hamlet via NT live, a group of students behind us was talking in very hushed tones, lady nearby turned and hissed for them to be quite and they obliged. Cue the same lady then opening up a big packet of crisps ten minutes later and rustling her way through the rest of the performance!

honkinghaddock that's a real shame, I find them so invaluable. i am hoping that Finding Dory will be on at Cineworld at the beginning of September - hopefully everyone else will have seen it by then.

The local-ish Vue does an autism screening for £1.99 (I guess a bit like the kid's club showing) I imagine that could just end up as a free-for-all. The others are still full price so I'm not sure why many people would choose that screening over standard ones.

My 8yr old can then wander round to his heart's content.

In case it's of use to anyone, the UK Cinema Association has just launched a new website for people looking for relaxed or audio described screenings.

www.accessiblescreeningsuk.co.uk