AIBU the hospital should have known the cord was wrapped around DS

[LubiLooLoo]

This is not an angry thread. But during labour I was left for 5 hours in stage 2 on the horrendously painful cytosine, told I wasn't pushing hard enough, was refused pain relief because it would slow delivery, and held down on a bed...

I'm sure everyone there was utterly professional. But the baby's heart rate was dropping during contractions, and no matter how much I said I was pushing, I was told it wasn't hard enough. The midwife said if I could breath or make noise I wasn't pushing hard enough.

Eventually had a happy (if shaken) baby boy delivered via forceps, which was when they realised he was tangled and the cord was around his neck twice...

But shouldn't they have had some idea that there was a problem that wasn't just my ability to push? I coped with labour really well up to the point they introduced synthetic hormones. Anyone else know anything or had experiences similar?

You were pushing for 5 hours?? Very unusual, they normally intervene after two hours? or sometimes less if it's not your first baby. I pushed for 3 3/4 hrs with my dd. I was only allowed to try for that long as we were both coping with it and the consultant was in theatre so unable to come see me anyway.

My ds was born with the cord wrapped round his neck twice (it had to be cut off when he was delivered). There was meconium in my waters and I was only allowed to push for a short while before intervention, luckily I pushed him out in just under an hour but they anaesthesed me down there to help me get him out quicker and I did tear a bit.

Personally I couldn't use gas and air and push at the same time, I found I didn't need pain relief at the pushing stage anyway. With pethidine etc I don't think they can give it to you in the 2nd stage as it's too close to delivery to risk it.

21 years ago my son was born with the cord around his neck 3 times and knotted. It was so tight it had to be clamped and cut from him. He needed resuscitation. It was the most frightening time of my life. The worst thing was the staff DID know about it only nobody mentioned it to me until I heard the midwife telling a student. The previous day I'd been monitored and scanned due to reduced movements. I still feel bitter that it was a close shave. My mother lost a newborn son this way between my elder brother and me . I sympathise with you , it leaves a lasting impression

Sorry just to add - I've never been able to talk about this in real life because of my mums dreadful loss. I know I'm lucky to have my amazing son but it still upsets me

DS had the cord round his neck and also under his arms and around one leg. Effectively holding him in place and not allowing him to move down and engage. I was having 4 weekly scans to monitor a different issue and nobody noticed the cord issue.

I didn't go into labour. I was induced at 40+15 and 4 days on a drip still hadn't induced labour. Not a single contraction. In the end I threatened to leave the hospital, removed my drips and tried to go back to the ward to collect my bag. They wouldn't let me go, put me back on the drip. I ended up removing the drips again and creating a HUGE scene. DS was finally born by emergency CS 7 days after I was first induced. They had to chop him out - I have a large L shaped scar!

I blame the hospital for being generally crap and not doing anything about the failed induction - such as thinking there might be a reason the baby wasn't engaging and I wasn't going into labour - but not for not knowing that he was so caught up. The midwife said she's never seen a cord so long - albeit in multiple small pieces! DS was fine though, thankfully.

I had a similar experience. My second stage lasted 4.5 hours. I'd got to 10cms using gas and air in the birth centre, but when it came to pushing nothing was happening.
Then they transferred me to hospital and put me on the evil syntocin (sp?) drip to make my contractions worse to "shake him up a bit" as they kindly told me. This is when it became unbearable painful and undignified for me. I wasn't allowed an epidural as my blood results were showing I had an infection.
After 4.5 hours of me begging them to do something they finally delivered my Ds by c section because I could not push him out.
I tried to put it behind me and just be grateful I had a healthy son, but the whole experience upset me so much I had a birth debrief a year on. The midwife told me that they didn't consider the 4.5 hours to be unreasonable for a second stage, and that they had only left me that long because I had done so well in labour to get to 10cms that they wanted to give me every chance of delivering him myself.
That praise gave me a bit of comfort, and I was glad I got to tell them how appalling the situation was for me after they put me on that evil drip. As it was my first baby I wasn't well informed and just accepted every intervention. If I have another baby I will feel more empowered to say "no" to things like that.
I think a debrief might help you, but also feel proud that you laboured well and you did deliver a healthy baby.

You can speak to a midwife at the hospital for a debrief. My GP didn't know she existed but a friend told me and I went over a year after I gave birth. Think she was called a midwife counselor. She had my notes and went through things. Was reassuring. Gave me a card to contact her if I had another baby (I never did!)

Oh yes seething on your behalf Lorele what's with the 'natural birth' bollocks. And as if any woman is thinking 'oh this giving birth is very enjoyable I won't push too hard as these contraction feel so nice' ffs!

Well done to all of us for just getting through it. To everyone

Tiny thanks, just one in a long line of shitty little undermining comments - he's gone now, hurrah!

I couldn't push with my last. The pain down there was unbearable and unnatural. Not only could I not push but I couldn't sit stand or do anything. The midwife and DH basically told me off for refusing to try but I just couldn't. My previous two came naturally. They tried forceps with no success and he was a c section. He had the cord round his neck but so did my middle one who I had the urge to push out from 9cm. The whole being unable to push thing was weird but I resent it being implied it was 'poor maternal effort'

merlinsbeard87

It sounds to me like a similar experience to mine. My labour went from relatively nice, in control and peaceful to undignified, frightening and truly painful in a short space of time.

But as you said, we know now!

Also, well done ladies. You are machines! Hope you're all proud of yourselves.

Held down on the bed is the disgraceful bit how dare they. I had similar but they told my ex to do it, he wasn't that brave

Anyway you can't control the urge to push. If it's there you push. You can't help it. I didn't realise this until I had no push feeling at all with ds1 and was being told to
Push but failing dismally. No urge.

Ended up with forceps and he was back to back.

My other 3 were straightforward anterior and the urge to
Push was overwhelming.

Held down on the bed is disgraceful

Both my babies were born with the cords wrapped round their neck twice - ds in particular had worrying heart rate dips etc. I don't know if it was definitely related to the cord though. I pushed for about an hour with him and with Dd it was one big push and she was out so maybe less chance for problems???

Fwiw I felt uneasy after dd's birth about a few things - I left it for a year then finally went in and spoke about it and felt so much better!

I only have two DCs but in my experience pushing is nothing to do with you. DC1 I pushed for an hour (with hormone drip) and needed forceps to get him out. DC2 came after two pushes. Completely different experience. With DC 2 I wasn't even consciously pushing; it was like an outer body experience and I had absolutely nothing to do with it, something else completely took over. With DC1 I was consciously pushing as hard as I could with each contraction but my body just wasn't doing it, I never had that urge to push. Once you've had it you know what it's like, but without it I firmly believe that pushing will never work.

Yes exactly that wuthering that was my experience too.

The push urge is simply primeval and overwhelming and you cannot hold back. Certainly it's uncontrollable.

Sorry about your experience. My first had the cord round his neck twice and across his body and was born with a double episiotomy and forceps (sewn up incorrectly and had 3 corrective procedures afterwards) but he was fit and well and is nearly 24. I was in labour from Wednesday to Saturday and at the hospital in labour for over 24 hours. My second was induced early to ensure that there would not be similar problems. He had the cord round his neck which was unlooped during birth and I needed no other assistance other than gas and air. He was however classed as stillborn but was successfully revived and is fit and well and approaching 15.

I have since been told that in the "olden" days I myself would not have survived the first birth.

It seems awful and traumatic at the time and for a while afterwards but if you and your baby are physically healthy now please try to realise you are not alone. Many people never tell others what they went through especially to pregnant friends for fear of scaring them. ((Hugs)) to you and the baby. I hope you are feeling better now and be assured the medics in this country do all they can for every family.

My DD had cord around her neck but they only let me push 1/2 hour. The midwife told me after the first push that I'd have to push harder than that but I'd put everything into that first push so was a bit concerned. They didn't know that she had the cord around her neck then. She eventually called the dr. An entire team came running in and they pulled her out by ventouse in 2 contractions. I was very relieved. 5 hours does seem a lot to be left pushing.

Ironically three of my babies had the chord wrapped round their necks, all born blue and one was in intensive care for a couple of days. The other two, who didn't have the chord wrapped round their necks, were the ones that were being monitored for foetal distress. I didn't know you could ask for a debrief, no one has ever mentioned it. I'd have loved to have one, but I think it's a bit late for me.

Should have said that none knew that the three had the chord round their necks until after delivery. I was also told that if I had had the water birth I wanted, I could have lost the first one as a result. I opted against that for any of the others.

unchallenged cords

A very high percentage of births involve a nuchal cord. This article is very interesting - explains how the nuchal cord had become a bit of a scapegoat for problems in labour which aren't well understood.

My DC had a clip on their head for monitoring and the heart rate was dropping. Turned out to be a faulty clip. (Also ended up pushing pointlessly for 2.5 hours after being in labour for 4 days before a forceps delivery. Still haunts me many many years later.)

I think there must be different 'degrees' of the heart rate dropping with contractions. I'd read somewhere online that it was normal for the baby's heart rate to dip slightly with contractions, so when they put me on the monitor after my waters went and I'd been admitted (finally after days of back to back labour) and DP noticed the dipping I was very unconcerned. However the midwife was incredibly concerned when she saw it, got a doctor to look at the trace immediately who didn't leave our side after that, and around two hours later they did a caesarean as I wasn't progressing and the heart rate was dipping still with contractions which made them suspect the cord was round her. It was, three times (head, torso and feet). No way was she coming out without a fight! I'd been feeling quite crap about my long, unproductive labour before that. Afterwards it all made sense. Maybe ask for a birth debrief if it's still playing on your mind, that's what the service is there for!