To think this is very odd? (another mil one)

[FindingEmo]

Mil is not in the best of health and she goes on about it a lot but something's don't seem to be adding up at the moment and I don't know if it's me.
Mil has dialysis and was on the transplant list (supposedly).
My gran is in hospital and we have been warned that any day now she will be gone. The day my gran was admitted (it wasn't known it was this serious at the time) mil ring and said she had growths on her kidney and it was possible her cancer was back (she had breast cancer well over 10 years ago but completely recovered and has had no sign since). So me and dh are trying to support each other but and up arguing a lot due to stress. Mil days biopsy booked etc so we wait for results and she says at has to wait to see consultant and it is likely to be months which I was a bit about but I don't really know how these things work. She also says she has been taken off transplant list until result a are known. So any way dh rang hwr yesterday and said things with my gran were v bad. Suddenly Mil has had her results and it's not cancer. Today she rang dh in tears about my gran (they've only met once) and then told dh that she wasn't going back on the transplant list as it was too much hassle (I mean wtf ). I briefly spoke to to my dmum to find out how my dad (it's his mum in hospital) was doing and I mentioned that mil had been given good news etc and my mum who is the nicest person to everyone snapped and said that woman is the nicest attention seeker ever.
Aibu or is the whole thing really weird?
I've posted other threads about pil off behaviour before but this is even worse.

Sorry for the long confusing post.

My mum has breast cancer and has decided not to get it treated. She didn't use the phrase 'too much hassle' because she is old school and very articulate. Her reasoning is that the mastectomy and radiotherapy will be painful, invasive, will take over all our lives and will probably only give her a few more years of life. All this is based on her experience of nursing my dad through the cancers that eventually killed him. She would rather live a shorter time and have a better quality of life with any medical interventions focussing on necessary pain relief.

All of which does boil down to 'too much hassle'! Sometimes, for some people extending life at all costs is not their priority so I can understand your MILs decision not to have a transplant. All that being said she does sound like a massive drama llama and attention seeker.

I hadn't thought about it making her think about her own death etc.

I think my judgment is probably clouded because both pil are quite self centred and have caused us lots of hassle and out a strain on our marriage several times. And her crying to dh just got to me, especially as dh hasn't even given me a hug etc and it feels like he's do focused on mil that my feelings aren't important. Dh is ill at the moment too so has been no help with dc or around the house etc so I might just be focusing my resentment on mil.

There seems to be some kids communication or mil is getting forgetful. Mil just rang to ask how dh was an I asked her if she knew whether her and fil were coming to ds1s birthday party as dh had spoken to them a week ago and then said they wwerent sure if they could come (or that's what dh told me). Mil said dh had never asked her about coming to the party. I'm wondering if this week has been some misunderstanding either from mil or dh.