HV has put my 9 week old son on a diet

[OneForTheRoadThen]

I have a beautiful 9 week old son. He was born at 36+6 and spent the night in SCBU with an infection but after 4 days in hospital he recovered really well. He also had a tongue tie that was snipped at 11 days. However he has never ever latched on so therefore I feed him by expressing as much as I can (usually about 10 oz a day) and feeding him formula for the other feeds.

He weighed 7lb 9 at birth and has put on almost 1lb each week since then so he now weighs 14lb. He is on the 75th centile and quite chubby (but gorgeous).

I have been taking him to be weighed every week at the HV's request and she has often commented on how much weight he has put on. A couple of weeks ago she told him I was feeding him too frequently - I had been feeding on demand and he was feeding about every 2 hours - and that I needed to feed him every 3.5 - 4 hours. We had been working towards this and now I feed him every 3.5 hrs but he would be happier with 3 hourly feeds. Although he doesn't cry he does root, suck his fingers and have to be distracted with a dummy. He was having 6oz every 3.5hrs and finishing the bottle.

I got him weighed yesterday and the HV said he was eating far too much and I was risking him getting obese and having breathing difficulties. She said he must cut down to 5oz every 3.5 hours 'although he wouldn't like it' and be weighed weekly to monitor his progress.

Obviously I feel dreadful. It really upsets me to see him hungry and the constant clock watching and distracting him is getting me down. So AIBU to tell her to fuck off? Or AIBU to continue feeding him on demand and risk his health in the future?

I'd really appreciate any advice from people who have had similar experiences. Thanks.

[Mumoftwoyoungkids]

I've just dug out my old red books and ds was 13 pounds 8 at 7 weeks and 16 pounds by 11 weeks!

That put him just over the 91st centile for weight. He was also very long (98th centile for height) and had a massive head (98th centile).

The health visitor described him as "a beautiful perfect healthy boy - isn't he doing wonderfully". He's now 3 and very average for height and weight.

What is your son's length like? Because (shock horror!) longer babies do weigh more!

One thought - is he thirsty? It has been very hot recently. i have a feeling that Ff babies do need water - especially in the summer.

[Citizenerased123]

It would probably be sensible to get your GP to review and document their opinion and advice rather than to just ignore the HV advice; whilst I don't necessarily agree with the advice you have been given, if you ignore it and your baby has a problem in the future, they could raise concerns that you have ignored HV advice. Is there a sensible GP with an interest in paediatrics in your surgery?

My dd was 75th centile at birth and rapidly went up to 98th centile where she has stayed and our HV hasn't suggested at any point that I cut down the feeds (even though I have thought that maybe I should!) She is ebf and is very greedy and very chubby but I know from my ds that as soon as she weans and starts to mobilise her weight will stabilise.

[Peaceandl0ve]

As i said upthread, my boy was an overfed breastfed baby. The crying etc was not hunger but tummy pain. My health visitor was right to get me to stop feeding on demand. He is now 6ft at 14 years old and a perfect weight.

[WrappedInABlankie]

demented It was enough to land him in hospital and enough to make him jump centile line. She really needs to speak to her gp

[shinynewusername]

The whole point of centiles is that anywhere from the 1st to the 99th is normal

That is most definitely not the whole point of centiles.

[siscaza]

My middle child was on the 98th centile (height and weight) and we had same comment from HV at 3 months. I ignored and he is now a tall strapping 7 year old but a healthy weight for height. Third child was on 50th centile at birth then jumped up to 90th over the course of three weeks, she was the archetypal chubby baby... Scrummy!.... Stayed that way til 18mths when she dropped down to 80th centile as she didn't like weaning.

[Lacystacie]

Get a second opinion my dd was born 6lb 8oz and she 13 months now and the size of a 3 year old ! In the 98th centile for height and weighf and I have never once been told she is fat I was told as long as the height and weight are evenish on the centile then its fine if there is a big difference between the two that's when you look into over eating

[emsyj]

Was the health visitor aware that your DS was born a little early? Back when DD1 (now 6) was born, the red book had a 'pre term' weights/centiles page - does it still have this chart now? DD1 was born at 37+2 and so was tracked for weight on the 'full term' chart, even though if she had been born 2 days earlier she would have been put on a birth weight centile according to the pre term chart. The result was that she crossed multiple centiles until she caught up with where her weight should be. Because she was not technically born pre-term, it looked as though she had leaped more centiles than she 'should' - but if you had charted her from the 37 weeks chart, she actually only went up from somewhere between the 50th and 75th up to just over 75th. On the 'full term' chart she started out on the 2nd centile.
Could it be that the health visitor hasn't taken into account the fact that your DS was born slightly pre-term and this has made it look as though he has leaped more centiles than he 'really' has?? Just a thought. I still think the wise advice is to see an expert in real life, which I see you've decided to do.

[MammouthTask]

I suspect that this is cominfg from some recent studies showing that 'overweight' babies are more likely to become overweight children and then adults.
Except that weight itself has no meaning if you don't also look at the height and head circumference....

I was always told that you can't overfeed a baby..... Has that changed now?

[KindDogsTail]

themilkmeg.com/can-i-overfeed-my-breastfed-baby/

I think you should ignore her. The baby knows what he needs. This article says with breast feeding he will not put in too much weight and he will be sucking for more than just food too. His weight will even out.

It does say, when feeding from a bottle - either formulas or breast milk - then it is so much easier for the baby to get it, that he could have too much.

[OneForTheRoadThen]

Labracadabra - he was born on the 50th centile, dropped to the 25th and is now on the 75th. The HV thinks he is on the 98th though but I'm 99% sure she is reading the chart wrong.

Now you have said that it makes sense why she is worried. I've added a photo of his weight chart. Am I right in thinking he's still on the 75th?

[ChoudeBruxelles]

Ignore her. She's bonkers.

[teraculum29]

Dear Op,

change the HV, I was also worried that my DD was eating formula every 2 hours and since she was born she was on 90 centile.

Do not reduce milk intake, maybe change formula?? I changed for formula for hungrier babies and that helped she wasn't demanding feeding so often anymore.

[Poppyred85]

As Labracadabra said while other posters are giving their advice with best intentions this is something that needs to be discussed with your GP/ another HV as planned. It certainly sounds odd but there may be a reason for what she is saying if for example she is concerned that he may have CMPI etc. There are certainly guidelines on how much babies are likely to feed but these are guidelines, not rules. Babies do their own thing! FWIW my ds shot up the centile charts and we used to have a bet on how much he'd put on but as he was 10 weeks prem it was lovely to see that once he was home he went from tiny scrawny baby to chunker! He was EBF/FF fed on demand.

[greatscott81]

How ridiculous, you don't let a 9 week old go hungry. They regulate their intake at that stage. Feed your gorgeous bundle as and when he needs it. For what it's worth, I had battles with my HV because I chose to express exclusively (she was adamant I went purely to formula). You know what's right for your baby and go with your instinct.

[littlemissneela]

I haven't read the whole thread, but I remember my hv being concerned that my kids were either too low or two high on the percentile chart. I then read, as long as they are following the line and not going too high or too low either side of it they should be fine.
I think it is crazy her telling you to cut down on your babys feed amount and how often to feed them. Is there another hv you can see at tne practise? Or maybe see the gp about it.

[Poppyred85]

Also 9 weeks is too young for hungry baby formula. This is harder to digest as usually contains more starch to make them feel fuller but will just cause constipation at this age.

[tootsietoo]

My baby was 10lb 1oz at birth, 99th centile, and is now an overweight 9 year old. (It is like having a labrador around, she will eat every scrap of food available to her). Perhaps don't take any notice of HVs, but do make your own observations of your child's size and take the chance to cut down the food intake before he does become overweight. It is a much bigger battle once they have the freedom to choose food themselves.

[QuackDuckQuack]

Are those arrows meant to be adjusting for him being early? If so, they appear to show him on the 99.6th at 6 weeks adjusted to 2 weeks and then moving down a little to 98th (still adjusted).

But you can't compare any of that the to earlier non-adjusted plotted points which show him on 50th. If he was plotted on 50th at 5 weeks, weighing 5 kg and then she suddenly decides at 6 weeks that she should be adjusting him to 2 weeks, but he should stick to 50th centile then she would be expecting him to be 3.75kg at 6 weeks, so a loss of 1.25 kg.

So I don't think she quite knows what she's doing.

[QuackDuckQuack]

I think it's fair to say that not all HV understand how to use or plot the graphs. I'm sure the majority do, but I guess the ones that don't might struggle a bit with some of the maths.

[Poppyred85]

Sorry just seen the growth chart. Looks like she's correcting his age back to say he is on 98th centile. As he was born at 36+6 she is correcting his weight back to what his due date was. This is usually done for premature babies to account for the extra time that they spent outside when they should have still been in. I wouldn't routinely do this for a baby born at 36+6 as if he'd been a day later you wouldn't bother! Essentially she thinks he's on the 98th centile, which he would be if he was 2 weeks old! Should say I'm a GP.

[OneForTheRoadThen]

Quack - I'm not sure what those lines are either. I'll try and find out what she's doing.

[MintChocAddict]

I took DC1 to be weighed at the clinic once after the midwife/HV visits finished and didn't take DC2 at all. Trust your instincts.

DC1 was pre-term and after a few weeks of being small, got very hungry. He's now a tall healthy 9 year old and not remotely overweight. Hopefully the other HV will put your mind at rest.

[Porg]

My youngest was having six full bottles of milk a day at three months old. I was told it was dangerous as he could overdose (it was a vitamin, D I think ). I was told to start giving him food. It was never suggested that I try to limit his intake by making him go hungry. I would get a second opinion.

[OneForTheRoadThen]

Thanks Poppy. So that is why she thinks he has jumped up the centiles and is concerned. That makes more sense now.