To expect to be kept in the loop when someone takes DD out for the day?

[NapQueen]

Collected this morning. Venue closes at 4pm so told "closes at 4 but they may get bored before then" and dh and I asked that taker text us when she left venue so we could make sure we were in to take her back.

No word. Not a jelly bean. It's 6.40pm.

Actually before the time of mobile phones, I would have agreed on a time with my mum and then expect to give her a call if I was late (esp late by 2.5 hours because I knew she would have been beside herself).
So yes, even before mobile phone, in this instance, I would have expected a call or for her to be back on time.

The problem there is that your DH isn't bothered and clearly thinks it' OK for someone to be that late and that yoou just need to trust her completely...

It's with your DH that yoou need to have a word with first and agree on what is or isn't acceptable when your dd is away with someone (whoever it is)
Eg if your dd is out for the day with a friend and the parents come back 2.5 hours late, is that OK with him?

Op I agree with you. It's a bit controlling isn't it?

If I take out my grandson I keep mum and dad in the loop with photos and updates. To ignore a parents texts or bring back late without notice is plain rude and nasty. Unless there's a bloody good reason.

My 24 year old texts me if he's going to be late home if his plans change as I would do too.

My teens text too. It's good manners and caring about each other's feelings at the very least.

Btw I don't and never have expected updates with photos and whatever during the day. I don;t expect my teens to send me a text to say they are all and well.
I do expect everyone to keep to theeir words. That means arriving back at the time agreed.
Surely it has nothing to do with mobile phones and whatnot but everything to do with politeness?

Depends on how you communicate as a family - my mum would do this but I'd either ring her til I got her - or make the most of it and go out - you know she's in safe hands I wouldn't worry too much - she brought your husband up ok

I'd expect a phone call even if she was out with other parent for the day. I'm primary career and let DH know where I am and approx home time and text if battery running low. If expect him to do likewise.

Well..... he is a smasher, admittedly, however she has a very lasses fairs approach to life in general. If she had wanted to keep her out till 8pm I wouldn't have minded a bit. I just want a basic level of communication. 2.5 hours after the time we were expecting a response, and only giving it when asked, imo is bad crack.

Dh's indifference to it all is mildly frustrating however probably just part of his personality.

Two hours after they were due back or two hours after you thought she'd give you an update? It's a bit confusing

2 hours after I thought they'd be back. Venue closes at 4; 30-40 min drive home. Said they'd let us know when they were leaving