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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Earrings on babies and toddlers

63 replies

Unicorn1981 · 18/07/2016 12:03

I don't get it and would worry they'd get pulled out but understand it's ok in other cultures. Just wondering what everyone's thoughts are. I suppose it saves doing it when they're older but I had mine pierced when I was 13 and the back got stuck.

OP posts:
Dontyoulovecalpol · 18/07/2016 12:58

Wealthy doesn't mean a higher social class though

charlestonchaplin · 18/07/2016 13:09

It is hard to find one of these babies who has grown up to regret her parents piercing her ears, especially in cultures where female ear piercing is ubiquitous. I can only speak for myself. I am glad it was done early, when it was just one of many things that briefly distressed me. I like having pierced ears. They are part of my identity, but I'm quite the wuss when it comes to pain for 'beauty' procedures so I'm glad it was done and dusted a long time ago.

charlestonchaplin · 18/07/2016 13:13

In countries where female ear piercing is universal or near universal, there is no correlation between social class and ear piercing. Obviously.

LellyMcKelly · 18/07/2016 13:18

It seems to be going out of fashion with young girls. When I was 10 most of my friends had their ears pierced and I plagued my mum for months until she let me get them done for my 11th birthday. My 10 year old doesn't want hers done and none of her friends seem bothered either. She has described it as a weird thing to do!

Dontyoulovecalpol · 18/07/2016 13:20

Yes but the British don't like it partly through snobbery and they wouldn't consider an Eastern European or South American to be upper class (in the British sense) no matter how rich really would they?

Although, that aside, those cultures which embrace piercing are generally doing so as a show of wealth (which, relatively, may be very little, but show off what you do have)
It's a way of displaying jewellery, and buying jewellery is either a way of showing off your wealth or an investment (gold) or a way of keeping wealth safe- In countries where the banking/ security system isn't reliable or accessible.

These aren't lovely romantic religious or cultural reasons people are piercing ears for so I don't really a see why the fact people do it in less developed countries is relevant really.

JennyOnAPlate · 18/07/2016 13:23

My 6.5yo has been nagging to have hers done for about a year now (since one of her school friends got hers done.) I'm close to caving to be honest...I've explained how it is done and told her that it will hurt but she is standing firm!

Eatthecake · 18/07/2016 13:25

I don't get why anybody would put earrings on a baby or even an under 5 I've never understood it, when I was little I was 12 when mum&dad let me have my done.

It's different strokes different folks

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes · 18/07/2016 13:28

I'm friends with a professional and can only imagine the horror on her face should someone bring in a baby/toddler and ask her to pierce them.

Who's doing it? No one reputable would do it. I suspect a lot of them are done at home with a sewing needle and ice or with that grubby gun thing at Claire's by someone whose training was a 30 minute DVD. It's not safe.

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes · 18/07/2016 13:28

Professional piercer, sorry.

Pinkheart5915 · 18/07/2016 13:29

I don't like seeing them on babies/young children but the parents of the child obviously do and there are far worst things people can do to there children rather than have ears pierced.

I had my done at 14 after nagging my parents a lot and by 15 I'd stopped wearing ear rings and I've never worn them as an adult it was a passing fade.

We are all different, we all like different things

BlueLeopard · 18/07/2016 13:31

I wouldnt be a fan tbh. I got mine done at age 7 after I begged. My mum did educate me on the infections etc and how to clean my studs properly but I still had a nickel allergy and suffered. So my views on piercing might be coloured by my own experience.

Like religion, best left until the child is old enough to not only want them but to be able to understand how to clean and put up with the initial pain or discomfort. I'd worry about them getting studs or hoops caught in something and damaging their earlobes so hopefully not too young.

MintJulip · 18/07/2016 13:31

yes there are far worse things to do and not liking it - doesnt mean you think its severe child abuse either.

on the other hand its totally unnecessary and down to vanity from the parents.

I winced at baby barely standing pulling hers - crying...cue parent fiddling with them, more tears why?

charlestonchaplin · 18/07/2016 13:31

That doesn't apply to my culture, calpol. Often just fashion jewellery is worn. At special occasions perhaps, but then you'd also wear your best clothes on a special occasion.

DoNotBlameMeIVotedRemain · 18/07/2016 13:32

I had mine pierced when I was 4 or 5. I did ask for it as some friends had had them done. My DD is 8 and hasn't asked for it yet. I grew up in a working class family but live in a middle class area now so I do think it is more prevalent in working class communities.

DoNotBlameMeIVotedRemain · 18/07/2016 13:34

I don't either way now by the way as long as the piercing is cared for and kept clean.

wigglesrock · 18/07/2016 13:34

Mine have had their ears pierced somewhere about 6 or 7. Same as I did. Most of the girls in their class had it done about the same age, maybe nearer 8. My second daughter is 8 and I think most if not all of the girls in her class have pierced ears.

NicknameUsed · 18/07/2016 13:36

It isn't very practical though. DD puked up mist of her feeds until she was on solids, and most of it ended up on her ears. Keeping them clean would have been impossible.

harshbuttrue1980 · 18/07/2016 13:43

Everyone can do what they like to their own body, but I don't feel that people should have the right to make any permanent mutilations to the body of someone else without their consent.

Dontyoulovecalpol · 18/07/2016 13:46

What's the cultural reasoning behind your culture doing it then Chaplin?

P1nkP0ppy · 18/07/2016 13:51

Absolutely hate it, it's child abuse and fulfills some grotesque parental whim.
Nothing to do with culture imo, that's an excuse.

purplefizz26 · 18/07/2016 14:07

I think it is something best left well alone until they are old enough to want them pierced understand the pain/aftercare.

I don't think it looks nice, I think it's kinda pointless to be honest.

I met a woman in a&e once with a screaming toddler. She was revisiting the hospital after the kid had accidentally pulled a stud out the week before, torn the skin, and ended up with an infection and constant problems with the ear lobe not healing. I just don't understand why anyone would put their young child through this aggro just for some sparkly shit on their ears!!

Dontyoulovecalpol · 18/07/2016 14:19

P1nkp0ppy it's obviously not actually child abuse though is it? I mean I don't like it either but obviously if it actually were child abuse you'd have SS involved with all these families Shock

Shizzlestix · 18/07/2016 14:19

If its abusive, then surely so is circumsicion? Even if that has been shown to improve health.

A Mediterranean colleague who is pregnant with first dd is already debating the earring thing, it's totally routine where she's from.

AppleSetsSail · 18/07/2016 14:20

Surely it's just gilding the lily. Babies require no adornment.

ThoraGruntwhistle · 18/07/2016 14:21

The thing about circumcision being healthier is debatable too though.