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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have booked a surprise holiday?

21 replies

TheViewFromTheSheepSeats · 17/07/2016 21:34

Not a TAAT but I saw a comment on another thread that worried me somewhat!
I have booked a holiday for next year (deposit only so far) for myself, DP, DM & DF and my 3 younger DBs (5yo, 12yo and 19yo)
The 19yo DB knows about the holiday and as he is working will be contributing a little, the holiday will be during school holidays so no risk of fines ect, and the whole point is to give my low income, very good to us DPs and siblings a lovely free holiday.

But having read some of a different thread I'm now worrying I am out of order going about this secretly (a nice surprise I thought)

AIBU?

OP posts:

ANiceSliceOfCake · 17/07/2016 21:36

Have you not consulted your DP? I'd be a little miffed if my DP did this without even asking me to be honest. Even if it sounds like a nice thing to do.

Original poster

TheViewFromTheSheepSeats · 17/07/2016 21:38

No no my DP knows! It's my parents that are in the dark (as it's a surprise for them)

OP posts:

FeelingSmurfy · 17/07/2016 21:43

Depends on the person but I would NOT want to be surprised with this, and most people I can think of wouldn't either

Tell them all about it, gives them time to get their heads around it, plan anything they need to and most importantly time to get excited and look forward to it

MsVestibule · 17/07/2016 21:44

Will the holiday end up costing them more money than they can afford, e.g. spending money, holiday clothes?

MsVestibule · 17/07/2016 21:45

And I really wouldn't want to be surprised with something like this, but you know your parents. When are you planning on telling them?

Enkopkaffetak · 17/07/2016 21:46

I would love this as a surprise.

Original poster

TheViewFromTheSheepSeats · 17/07/2016 21:47

Yes I think you are probably right..... We have all discussed 'wanting a holiday' but I know that my parents can't afford to take the boys away, and I wanted to so something nice for them
But yes, I am BU aren't I.

OP posts:

Original poster

TheViewFromTheSheepSeats · 17/07/2016 21:48

Planning on telling them at Xmas, holiday in may.
Yes I am starting to worry about the spending money ect issue. Half tempted to cancel but that seems so silly!

OP posts:

anyoldname76 · 17/07/2016 21:54

id tell them now to give them time to save for spending money etc, its a lovely gift though

maras2 · 17/07/2016 21:59

You know your own parents but quite honestly if our kids ( age 34 and 40) did this we would not be very happy at all.

CalleighDoodle · 17/07/2016 22:00

Is it expensive where you are going?

Nocabbageinmyeye · 17/07/2016 22:02

No don't cancel but definitely tell them now. Christmas to May is not enough time to save spending money if you don't have money to save. I get you are being nice but I would hate this too, i would love a free holiday and the thought behind it but not if it came with pressure, which this will unless you tell them now

FeckinCrutches · 17/07/2016 22:03

Goodness me I'd tell them ASAP. If they are low income 5 months isn't long at all to save for spending money, new clothes for your brothers, insurance etc. You'll be putting a lot of pressure on them. Will they need passports? Are you going abroad?

Osolea · 17/07/2016 22:03

Tell them, they will probably be very pleased at the idea whenever you tell them, so there's no point keeping it secret.

If you tell them now they might be able to pick up some things they might need in the end of summer sales this year, and they'd also have the opportunity to use Christmas as a time to gift each other things they might need.

You can still make it a lovely surprise, just an earlier one.

LagunaBubbles · 17/07/2016 22:05

Where is the holiday?

Original poster

TheViewFromTheSheepSeats · 17/07/2016 22:06

It won't be very expensive, self catering in Spain- they all have passports but I can see that it is probably most sensible to tell them now, the fact I was worrying was enough to tell me I was BU really wasn't it.

OP posts:

headinhands · 17/07/2016 22:07

How lovely of you op. I'm sure your thoughtfulness will really touch them. I would tell them at Christmas still. What a lovely thing to find out about in a Christmas card.

PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 17/07/2016 22:07

I think it depends where your going? Are you going to be paying for food etc? What are your parents like? All these things would depend if they will like it.

I would personally hate it as I have a MASSIVE phobia of flying but if someone took me to somewhere say on the euro tunnel or in this country then I would be pleased

FeelingSmurfy · 18/07/2016 13:13

Definitely don't cancel, just tell them now

Also good to know now because they can get clothes, swim stuff etc in end of summer sales

Sceptimum · 18/07/2016 13:31

Tell them when you get a chance. It's a lovely idea but you don't know what they are planning - they might book other stuff,.or need to schedule medical appointments etc.

sharknad0 · 18/07/2016 13:46

I think it's a lovely idea, but I would tell them now too. My parents prefer to have something to look forward to, and time to plan and gets things ready the way they like. In a way, the countdown is half the pleasure of a nice holiday. Your parents might be the same?

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