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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To drop this complaint against my manager?

5 replies

directyourcall · 14/07/2016 09:41

I had to go through my GP to get amended hours at work due to problems in my pregnancy, and told my manager. He told me verbally when to come in (in line with GP recommendations), and he would physically change the rota to reflect the changes. But he forgot to write in the changes. This went on for a while and it was really stressful as I was constantly being called at home to ask why I wasn't in. Including by my manager who kept forgetting! I kept asking him about it and I started to feel like he was becoming irritated with me.

I went to him about it and he told me that "No one knows when you're in work, I told you to change it yourself." I denied knowledge of this - I swear he never told me to - but said no problem, I will change it.

The next day, he shouted at me from across the office, in front of everyone, to say I'd done it wrong, that I had wasted his time as now he had to do it "for God's sake". I stuck up for myself and said I got it wrong because completing rota was not my role. He told me to get back to work, then I heard him say to a colleague "when I was young I wouldn't speak to my manager like that".

I found it upsetting and stressful as it was in front of everyone else in the office. My GP signed me off work (I was struggling by this point even with reduced hours and GP recommended I finish now). My OH said I should complain about what happened. HR at my work said they could arrange a meeting between me and my manager to resolve it, and that could happen either now or just before I go back to work.

I just don't know whether it was so severe that I would still care about it 6 months or so from now when I return or whether it's worth the stress of going in for a meeting with HR when my baby is due any time now. AIBU in leaving it, either for now or for good? HR said that if I did go through with a complaint, it would not be severe enough to warrant a transfer to a different department.

OP posts:
Lookatyourwatchnow · 14/07/2016 09:48

Drop it, sounds like something or nothing

icklekid · 14/07/2016 09:53

Probably not worth the stress or hassle if your not going back. Post maternity leave if your still concerned you still have that option open but I imagine things will have moved on and it won't matter so much...

directyourcall · 14/07/2016 10:41

Thank you for the replies. My friends are saying they'd understand why I'd drop it.

OP posts:
Mouikey · 14/07/2016 23:24

Might be worth writing it all down and putting it on your HR file, not to make a complaint but to have it recorded - I can't imagine that HR would look kindly on a complaint that is 6, 9 or 12 months old even with Mat leave - I would be surprised if they would do anything. so if you feel strongly you will need to complain now (in a timely fashion).

It shouldn't have happened (the way he spoke to you), I am surprised that your company didn't send you to OH to check the reduced hours request and your manager agreed to this (which had they have acted on it would have been very reasonable). For next time, tell your manager but also include HR as they have a duty of care to you as a company.

Sorry your going through this now x

directyourcall · 15/07/2016 11:37

Mouikey tell my manager what?

I did go through OH, just missed that part out in my OP to shorten it down.

OP posts:
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