Should I help pay for DN's education?

[LorettaJones]

I have two siblings and all together 2 DNieces & 1 DNephew.

My sister's seemingly lovely husband turned out to be a cheating, lying twat. DSis managed to rumble him about a month ago, kicked him out and has been trying to sort out her life/finances ever since.

The truth of the matter is, Dsis is 39 and hasn't worked in almost ten years, ever since they had DNiece(9). They've lived a comfortable lifestyle and are in the middle of a very messy divorce, DNiece attends an independent school and soon to be ex BIL has threatened to stop paying for it if DSis doesn't start to act reasonable. Truth be said, she's is taking him to the cleaners and acting slightly scary.

She's currently started looking for employment and if she manages to put her degree to use can hopefully find something very quickly and suitable, but she's asked me if I would loan her the money for DNieces schooling for the following school year, it's a lot of money & I do trust she'll pay be back but I'm just not sure when and what if DBrother asks if I'll do the same for his 2 kids?

Am I overthinking it?

I would stay out of it.

It's not as if she needs to borrow money for a rental deposit, or to eat. It's for private school.
At that age it won't even make that much difference.

The fallout from her not paying, or you being asked the same by your other sibling is worse than a 9 year old girl going to a non-fee paying school.

What sort of wage is she likely to get when she gets a job?

If I could afford and not worry how long it took for her to pay back then I would, but whatever your decision you need to be clear on this asap, as she is going through a very difficult time and needs certainty. My mum became a single parent and approached her sister for money to help with major house repairs. She agreed and at the last minute (once builders were in!) said her husband had gone against the idea. Luckily a neighbour agreed to loan. My mum had it paid off within a year. Keeping things as normal as possible for the children is more important than just saying state schools are fine.