to think this is controlling

[WeeEnglishRose]

Long story short, I went to cut the hedge today, but DH had a go at me because I didn't want to wear safety goggles while using the hedge trimmer. Yes, the handbook says they should be worn, but I wear glasses and the goggles make my vision go funny, which I didn't think was very safe when using a large bladed instrument.

He switched off the plug and stood in front of me, refusing to let me turn it on until I put the goggles on. I said that as an adult, I'm entitled to make my own choices about what's safe or not, and he can have an opinion but can't force me. He went in a massive huff, eventually stormed off, saying I was "stupid" and "you wouldn't let your child do that, so why should I let you".

I have massive issues with these, he seems unbothered and is being smug, saying he is right and there should be no debate on safety issues.

Any thoughts?

Don't know about him being exactly controlling, but he's definitely a patronising, rude, arrogant twat. How DARE he call you a fucking cunt!

You should of course try to use safety goggles, but I have glasses too and can't wear them easily. I tend to use my glasses as the protection (unless there is serious risk from something other than bits of leaves/sticks flying into my eyes - acid, for e.g. - always wore my goggles in chemistry)

This cannot be a one-off! You didn't post about a totally out-of-character event, did you, WeeEnglishRose?

Do you want to tell us some more about how your DH is treating you? How long have things been like this?

I think not wearing safety glasses is reckless, eye injuries can have life changing consequences. You can get safety goggles to over specs for less than £20.

That said I don't think your post is really about strimmers and goggles. Your H sounds horrible, whats really going on?

But it's your choice, as an adult, to take that risk.

Yes, it is. However, in a normal loving relationship I would say that the person who (a) loves and cares about you and (b) will have to look after you and (almost literally) pick up the pieces if you injure yourself is absolutely entitled to object strongly.

Only you know whether your DH complies with (a) and his methods of dealing with this are appalling, but please for your own sake don't take this sort of risk.